Tag:

choose

The Best Life Or Nothing At All

by todestrieb 1/23/2015

written by todestrieb

When given a choice to have the best life on earth or not be born at all, what will you choose?

This is a close one for me, but I think I’ll choose not to be born at all. You simply can’t deprive someone of something who is oblivious. On the other hand, once you are here on earth there is bound to be things that you can’t do and can’t have. You can’t break the law or you will go to jail, you can’t do whatever you want in a relationship or you will hurt the other person, and you definitely can’t walk through walls or teleport from one place to another. […]

1/23/2015 3 comments

An Unwelcome Guest

by Silverbird 1/16/2015

written by Silverbird

A disclaimer to the world.

I really don’t belong. There’s no conceivable place on this planet where I belong.

The public is my enemy. If you put someone in front of me, I’ll do everything in my power to disregard them, including not-disregarding them. My mask is so genuine that it even deceives myself half the time, such is the cost of being able to blend into society, and avoid being a homeless bum the rest of my pitiful existence (of which will continue to be a pitiful existence, bum or not, however bums are publicly pitiful, which is why I’m willing to throw myself away most […]

1/16/2015 1 comment

conflicted

by passionfruit3 1/11/2015

written by passionfruit3

How do you have everything going for you and yet still find yourself just going to screw itup for reasons that aren’t entirely valid right now?
I made up with my best friend, I have my first ever guy friend, and things seem okay.but my fear of the future is causing me to want to end my life.my younger sister has my same fear ironically enough shes afraid of turning eighteen this year cause my parents will divorce forcing us to have to choose who we want to go with mom or dad.i don’t want to choose id rather choose suicide shed rather leave to […]

1/11/2015 3 comments

Why?

by QuixoticNomad 1/5/2015

written by QuixoticNomad

When you’re suicidal, why do you choose not to kill yourself?

I don’t know why I haven’t killed myself yet. I am so tired of being depressed; I am so tired of my mood swings.

I wish I didn’t care about anything; I wish that I was a sociopath.

1/5/2015 4 comments

What should I do with social media?

by jasal 1/2/2015

written by jasal

I am going to kill myself soon. I have a question, however? Would it be better to delete my social media accounts completely before I commit the deed, or should I leave some of them for my family to do with as they please? (I also kind of wanted to keep my writing blog up as some sort of…I don’t know, testament to how much I loved creative writing.)

So, would it better to wholly erase my online identity–photos, videos, etc.? Would that lessen my family’s pain, since they would have less reminders of me after I die? Or would it better to let them decide […]

1/2/2015 4 comments

Needing Advice, Please!

by EvilKitten 12/18/2014

written by EvilKitten

It’s been a while since I’ve been on here. I’ve been really busy with work and such.

Things are going rough and I on’y have until the 30th of this month to turn things around or I’ll lose everything.

These are my choices:

1) Default on my storage units and lose all mine and my late husbands possessions.

2) Sell my body to come up with $400 by the 30th.

3) Chain myself to a tree in the middle of nowhere tonight in soaking wet clothes and freeze to death.

Out of those options, which would you choose and why? What do you think I should do?

I’m working, but I don’t […]

12/18/2014 29 comments

why we choose to live without purpose

by unknowninjuries 12/16/2014

written by unknowninjuries

I am a recently injured adult, 27, who obtained an ankle sprain, followed by a hamstring work injury, followed by an unknown ailment to my other ankle. I have been rehabbing for 3 months, with no end in sight, except to leave this predicament through alternative means. My doctors have to take an MRI of my new injury and I am still rehabbing my other two injuries. I’m taking two days off PT because my Achilles is hurting.
My history is that I have attempted suicide 3 times, without succeeding. Two times after my longterm ex’s broke up with me and once while injured in […]

12/16/2014 0 comment

Are you Afraid to Die?

by TheBoyWithRedShoes 12/2/2014

written by TheBoyWithRedShoes

I ask a question as old as it is cliche. I no longer fear the ambiguity of death as I once did. It is not the thought of the actual act of dying that scares me, but rather my willingness to let go. There is no reason for me to share my story. It is no sadder than any others. We all live with our own burdens and sins. Some of us choose to fight the good fight, to “keep on trucking” as the saying goes. Others of us get our lives cut short, never given the option. And some of us choose to tap out early, […]

12/2/2014 5 comments

A Little Release

by kissofdeath10 11/30/2014

written by kissofdeath10

So, someone wrote a post about “Window Shopping” the other day, and it got me thinking. I had this track I recorded lying around and decided to speak some words to it. Thanks for the inspiration! It’s a rough cut, but it helped me through the moment.

http://suicideproject.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/Window-Shopping.m4a

I am supposed to choose something

Anything, just not nothing

But I prefer the window-shopping

I get too overwhelmed by the options

It isn’t just tradeoffs, or give and take

There is so much more at stake

Pick what you want, but it might break

Then pay in time and tears for your fate

Imagine it’s a bomb that I’m meant to defuse

And I have to […]

11/30/2014 1 comment

In despair

by Septemberlove 11/22/2014

written by Septemberlove

I don’t know where to start. If I could choose this story would be a lot longer. I want to tell you a part of my suicide story.

Please, I know that when you are young you have your whole life ahead of you. But it doesn’t apply on me because I dont feel my age. Though my physical body is 17. So just bare with me.

Last year I started in a new school at the age of 16. I started there completly alone, with no one I knew. We where well prepaired for 3 years of studying by the teachers who made sure that everyone […]

11/22/2014 1 comment

Jumping into the void

by GalaxyEyesXx 11/20/2014

written by GalaxyEyesXx

It’s not like I think everyone hates me although I have never been loved by anyone except the people that are obligated to do so. We can’t choose our family someone once told me. If we could…would I have been chosen at all? I know that my absence will be a momentary sadness. I have been alone for so long. Fading in between the lines of their book. Into the crowd, just a forgotten ghost. I don’t even know how to handle company outside of family. Before it perturbed me deeply. But now I prefer to be alone. It is safe, predictable even if the […]

11/20/2014 3 comments

Despondency

by misterunknown 11/11/2014

written by misterunknown

I guess I’ve been depressed for years now.. And it’s rough. The worst of it is that most others don’t understand. “What’s wrong with you?” “You just have to be positive..” “I can’t handle you being sad all the time.” Lately the suicidal thoughts are occurring more often and seem to be sounding like very viable options, and I hate that. I woke up this morning and just cried. Mainly because I hate my job, my living arrangements, and my current economic standing. I hate that I am so ridiculously lonely all the time, yet consciously choose to be alone. I hate that I know […]

11/11/2014 2 comments

I knew it..

by genesis0987 11/9/2014

written by genesis0987

Deep down I knew it all along; I knew I would relapse. I just didn’t know it would happen so soon after I started getting better. Maybe I wasn’t actually getting better? Yeah, I got a job and started doing voluntary work but my mind is still empty. For more than 2 years now it’s been 97% empty, remaining 3% were occupied by my feeling of worthlessness and grief towards life. I stopped daydreaming long time ago. Nothing interests me, nothing bothers me. I don’t think. I’m getting dumber each day and it’s showing. I’m so done.. Even meds stopped working. Sometimes I still […]

11/9/2014 3 comments

by Remnant The Unbroken 10/29/2014

written by Remnant The Unbroken

I wish you would say hello to me. Ask me how I’m doing. But I know you will always choose her over me and I will sit here with all the loyalty and love I had for you and let it rot.

being alone hurts but I think it’s necessary now.

but forget about lonliness. My goal for the next hour, if my therapist decides to roleplay in session again in a few minutes, is to not have a breakdown on the way home again. Can’t fucking live the nightmares over and over again.

10/29/2014 0 comment

Why does this happen to me?!

by beatsme 10/8/2014

written by beatsme

Soo i’m 13 and i noticed i have no reason to live because my parents hate me (seriously, they freaking hate me), my brother that loved me so much is now treating me like a stranger and i have “friends” actually hates me. I don’t get it. I don’t get the reason that i choose to live, the boy that i like is the only reason i live. Why? he treats me soo much better than my “friends” and family.

I need advice on how to be happy, because i am sooooo close of taking my own life. so please help me, i need you.

10/8/2014 1 comment

grandpa why?

by death bunny 9/22/2014

written by death bunny

I didn’t knew my grandpa much. He died when I was 10 in his sleep. He was also depressed. Sometimes I blame him for my sufferings. It could be genetic. Then, he didn’t choose to fall into this pit, so I can’t be mad at him. I think he was a good person. My mother say so.

I’ve been told he was the manager of a sock factory. I’ve been told he survived the holocaust. I’ve been told he has been through a lot. It must have been nice when death greet him that night. Like a big relief. I wonder how’s that. Salvation. I wish […]

9/22/2014 3 comments

Understanding the Damned

by KissOfDeath 8/26/2014

written by KissOfDeath

I don’t expect you to understand,

no one ever does.

Our own mental status should be controlled by our own hands.

We are all condemned to death,

so why are we just sitting around?

Like ticking time bombs,

why not handle our own miserable lives,

instead of allowing others to choose our fate.

8/26/2014 2 comments

Sometimes, I think I hate everyone

by Engie 8/21/2014

written by Engie

and I just get by by pretending that I don’t. Not inwardly, I mean on the outside. A mask of sanity. I’m a apathetic misanthrope portraying the character of a normal lovable person in a perpetual improv act.

I’m polite and sweet. I listen to people. I laugh at their jokes. I’m considerate. My mind is dissecting them. I’m dead inside.

I’m just not there.

I’m not depressed any more. I haven’t been for almost a year, but I no longer feel complex emotions of any kind. Some would call this a mixed blessing. There is nothing mixed about it. If I had to choose, I would trade […]

8/21/2014 0 comment

Xxx

by buju 8/17/2014

written by buju

I have a stable pain inside, not going away, causing me to thinking about commiting suicide. I cannot enjoy anything, if you can send me to my happiest moment or give an option to just vanish, I would definately choose the second one. Most of the time I wish I was normal. While registering to this site I couldn’t help but think about the future; somehow if I end up committing suicide, this account will eventually be discovered by my friends/relatives, they probably will think this was a cry for help. It is nice to know that you are not the only wierd person who […]

8/17/2014 1 comment

Better post before its too late

by quaero 6/22/2014

written by quaero

I cannot choose anything in my life. Underground Man was right. No desire in me goes deeper than my desire for truth. i was wrong when i said i will choose freedom over truth if such a choice comes. i was recently given this choice. i stuck to truth. truth is unbiased. each decision in life is biased. you need a reason to do anything, and that reason has a beginning somewhere. no reason is “holy”. something has to begin somewhere. so how can i choose anything? on what basis i will make that choice? what is worthy enough to be given preference?

And what’s worse […]

6/22/2014 1 comment

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