Tag:

Cowardice

by Dan1983 7/11/2014

written by Dan1983

Most people in life have many people who would miss them… I have 1.

My entire life reads like a greek tragedy. First my mother didn’t want me and gave me health problems in an attempt to abort, then my siblings abused me physically (and sexually in one case), Then as I grew older the abuse got worse when we moved by my grandfather. My dad was never really around, and my family didn’t want, need, or had any wish to even see me… my mother would leave me places in the hopes I’d get taken and only my sister seemed to care (she was much […]

7/11/2014 2 comments

To be, or not to be? That’s a fine, fine question.

by AndInTheEnd 8/5/2013

written by AndInTheEnd

Everywhere I go, every place I look, I see people. I see love; I see happiness. I see what could be best described as a form of ignorant euphoria. Guys strut through the malls with their girlfriends, people just sort of hang out around places. Fuck. I don’t know. I don’t think I’ll ever know. What I do know is that I am feeling a sort of pain that cannot be rectified, minimised, or mitigated, due to its constant presence.

I will never experience love beyond that of my few friends, or that of my parents.

To be perfectly honest, I’m tired of my parents, particularly my […]

8/5/2013 11 comments

by stellaeric 5/8/2013

written by stellaeric

Today, I explained my non-intervention policy to one of the people I tentatively (for lack of a better term) call a friend. (Being more concerned with what they perceive as my interests than the interests themselves, I don’t think they can be termed “allies” precisely. So I use the word “friend” rather loosely, although I suppose it would be more accurate to say “one of those people I hang about constantly whom I happen to know”.) I interfere (interact, I suppose) with people as little as possible and would appreciate if they showed the same consideration to me.

She confronted me with the question: What if […]

5/8/2013 2 comments

Cowardice – I am all of it.

by Faithless 3/21/2013

written by Faithless

I am everything that I can be
So let this all just end for me
I’ve said my piece and played my part
And it’s set in stone; I’m faint of heart

This world grows crueler as each day dawns
Brutal and fit for kings not pawns
I am not one among that class
And I have not the will to last

I’m tired of this pain and hurt
And have no delusions of self worth
Regardless of the future pain
I wish not to wake again

I am of no consequence
No sung hero of grand event
Just this sorry bag of meat
Who finds living too […]

3/21/2013 4 comments

Changing

by AscahIsBroken 1/22/2013

written by AscahIsBroken

Instability is the only stable thing in me
Balance is challenging to me
Maybe I need something like peace

Hello serenity how have you been? It’s been quite a while since my needs were meant, in this parasitical relationship, your lack is hurting me
Hello algidity, you’re stuck in my bones. It’s been such a long time since I remember being warm, in this frigid cowardice, I’m not any closer to free

I’m not being heard and I wonder why, “Why am I”
“Why am I here because I’m not changing much”
The things I say the words I speak
I have to ask “Would I even […]

1/22/2013 1 comment

A man can only take so much…

by Son of Kings 11/26/2012

written by Son of Kings

I’ve tried before to take my own life, I was 22. Many things hadÂ occurred through out my life at that point all of which had been coming to a boil, my button had been pushed, death was the only way to escape. Â Some may find it cowardice, but not me, it’s my life, the things in my life are under my control, and at the time I felt I had lost control of everything. So I decided I was going to take control of something for once, it was one of the lowest days of my life. I was having issues finding work, the mother […]

11/26/2012 5 comments

Grieving all the time

by Ryann 11/20/2012

written by Ryann

I am sick inside. Alone, overwhelmed, confused, and filled with hatred for myself and regret for my life. I should never have been born. I told my dad that once, and he said it was an insult to him and to my mother. The funny thing was, he said it as if he thought it wasn’t meant to be. Well, it was. They were too young for kids when they had me. They were irresponsible, and their own parents were irresponsible. And you can probably trace it all the way back to the Stone Age. Too many people who had no business raising kids. And […]

11/20/2012 2 comments

Running away

by Arisu 11/3/2012

written by Arisu

I need to stop running away from all my problems. It’s not like they’ll disappear if I turn my eyes away. They’ll just keep building up and up until it not only affects me but everyone else in my life… But, that’s so much easier said than done.

I don’t talk to anyone anymore–what few “friends” I had, my family…no one. I’ll send the rare text from time to time to let them know I’m alive, but…if they try to start a conversation or call me I just ignore it. I don’t know how to face them anymore. I’m so disappointed with myself and what my […]

11/3/2012 1 comment

Why bother

by Sonic 9/24/2012

written by Sonic

I can’t say like i’m many of you. I’ve been pretty fortunate as far as life goes. But i dunno. No matter how well off you are there will always be a problem that somehow manages to get you. It’s pathetic

I don’t know why i carry on really. I used to like doing a lot of things and i had a lot of interests all over the place but i dunno what’s the damn point. It’s all useless idle bullshit. i’m bad at what i’m good at doing and i’m stupid to boot. I’m useless to society and i should just go kill myself except […]

9/24/2012 13 comments

courage and the world

by Venetia 8/6/2012

written by Venetia

so i’ve heard that there are good people in the world. and i have this stepfather who is generally an angel. but he’s, i would suppose, human. human in that-

somewhere, deep down, when nobody’s looking, people are petty, blind, stupid, immature, ingenuine, farcical, prejudiced, lying, selfish, ungrateful, sex-driven, etc. in some way

and i just can’t stand being surrounded by all of it. for some reason i suspect everybody of having these ugly sides. i’m all of the above too. and for some reason i just can’t stand that this is the world we live in. i usually ignore it but today it just drove me […]

8/6/2012 1 comment

Whats the hold up??

by CJMudd 5/6/2012

written by CJMudd

I have no real complaints, I have a job, no mortgage, no dog, no loans no-one depending on me.Â I have low self esteem and little or no self worth, I am a perfectly functioning person so long as I don’t have to talk to anyone. On those glorious days when I can go about my business with not an utterance falling out my mouth, not a single bit of eye-contact. I thrive. I live in a city though. Where it is extremely difficult to avoid everyone.

When interaction, is unavoidable, I regress into my shell arms legs and head in short, turtle like. I become a […]

5/6/2012 2 comments

Suicide – Not a Cowardly Act

by SadWingsofDestiny 4/5/2012

written by SadWingsofDestiny

IÂ have been depressd/anxious for 30 years but I have managed to find some happiness during that time too.Â I will never be “normal”. I know that sucidal thoughts have many causes, mentall illness, faulty thinking,Â life experiences or endogenous/ exogenousÂ depression.

But many times people commit sucide because sometimes the pain of life is way too much to handle. Why suffer everydayâ€¦why die a slow death everyday? We all die so why not decide for yourself when the right time is? My only cavaet is to really think about the ramifications especially if you are young. Things can change in an instant.

*Please try everything posible to live and strive […]

4/5/2012 5 comments

A Goodbye Letter

by Desperation57 2/16/2012

written by Desperation57

Â Â Â Â (the following is a letter I recently wrote in serious consideration with my personal thoughts. Sorry its not Hollywood style beautiful, but it is how I am feeling at the moment)

My dearest family, friends and anyone else that this letter may find its way too… This, in the end, may b worth nothing more then a bad joke because there r no words I can say to express how sorry I am… Sorry that I was blind to the blessings I already had and was selfish enough to think my problems were all that mattered. Sorry that I […]

2/16/2012 11 comments

If there is a god, he’s laughing his ass off

by antilex 2/10/2012

written by antilex

Hello everyone. I’m female, 17 y.o. – actually i’m turning 18 in 2 days. This is my first post. I’ve read the posts in this site before, but it wasn’t until now i decided to write something. It’s not the first time i’ve been thinking about suicide, as you can tell. Since the age of 11 i’ve been depressed most of the time, and i think i’ve forgotten what “joy” even means. I’ve never gone too far in my attempts, i’ve stood on the edge countless times, i’ve tied so many nooses and climbed high building, and i’ve actually prayed, i’ve prayed day and night […]

2/10/2012 3 comments

Empty Platitudes

by unclemeatrc 1/8/2012

written by unclemeatrc

If there is some positive takeaway I can give to others before I go it is this:

There is far, far too much hurt in this world.Â Averting your eyes, looking away, looking down, trying to ignore another human being in pain is weak.Â Being jaded, cold, unfeeling or taking a hard line with someone who is in pain is cowardice.

Every single day, we are confronted with people suffering whether it be sorrow from a break-up or death of a loved one or being in a place where you go hungry and are cold at night, it’s everywhere.Â This world, life, it’s a ************.Â It isn’t […]

1/8/2012 6 comments