Tag:

deep

Impaired and Destructive

by brodie3750 8/17/2015

written by brodie3750

…or at least that’s how I think I feel

I’m so worn down and tired all the time now. I’m not usually one to commit to displaying how bad I feel but recently I just had at It on social media (Instagram, snapchat, etc) Eventually people took notice and started worrying.

My boss called me in for a chat recently to see if I was alright. She looked at me funny when I couldn’t give her a reason as to why I feel so horribly bad. People who don’t actually suffer depression don’t seem to understand that it’s not necessarily a combination of negative things that make […]

8/17/2015 5 comments

Release…

by jadedkeizy 8/17/2015

written by jadedkeizy

These past few days have been full of epiphanies, deep reflection and tears and a strange sense peace. Knowing that my ship is about to set sail into the unknown has created some serenity in my mind. I was tired of being motionless and receiving constant beat down. Relocated to the country, all I do is just breathe and watch the lush greenery. I am preparing for release.

“Life can be a setback, and death can be progression
Life can be a burden and death can be release
Life can be a problem and death can be a solution
If your life is death there can […]

8/17/2015 0 comment

Will never get better

by bluu 8/16/2015

written by bluu

A vicious circle my life will always be.

I’ve always coped in the only way I know, it hurts me and creates even more darkness.

The small glimmer of hope came and passed; false and pretend, that’s all it ever was.

A vicious circle my life will always be.

In a week’s time, I will be nothing once again.

There is no future for someone with such deep struggles.

I held on for no reason; I will never get better.

I know.

8/16/2015 0 comment

I’m just tired

by Hollowway 8/14/2015

written by Hollowway

I’m trans, asexual, panromantic, and dead tired. I’ve been diagnosed with depression a year ago, when I cut myself too deep, and my parents found out. I didn’t want them to find out. I wasn’t trying to get their attention. It was my private thing, my personal haven, and I wanted it to stay that way. But I was careless, had to get some stitches, and I was outed as not-actually-alright.

I feel absurdly tired allthe time. I basically stopped leaving my house since I finished school. I don’t have the energy to do anything at all. There’s nothing that I’d like to be doing pretty […]

8/14/2015 3 comments

******

by lonelyguy91 8/5/2015

written by lonelyguy91

tired of being one. I wwant to avoid it but cant. and im so alone. If any of you people have someone in your life, like you have children or a fiancée , or bf/gf you guys are so lucky. you shouldn’t even be here, I hate you. if you cant see who ur with. im alone in this world and have no one to live with. ive had it, im tired of feeling misunderstood and lonely. im diseased no one is going to want me and its my fault. why keep living on my own? im so tired. I always think of cutting deep […]

8/5/2015 6 comments

shell

by hardlyhere 8/4/2015

written by hardlyhere

Lately I’ve just been feeling like a shell of the person I used to be. After you’ve been talked down to by nearly all the people you look up to, all the people you called friends, and people that don’t even know you, it starts to weigh down on you. Back in 2010, I lost someone very close to me to suicide. I began my freshman year very lost. I let my grades slip and became extremely recluse. My social anxiety sky rocketed. Like, I couldn’t even ask the teacher questions. That continued all 4 years of high school. I failed nearly all of my […]

8/4/2015 5 comments

Another poem. Just made it up

by wndozh8er 8/3/2015

written by wndozh8er

I look up to a deep blue sky, yet all I see is gray

An airplane flies overhead, I wish it was the Enola Gay

Fat Man, Little Boy, why must you keep me waiting

turn the sky Crimson red, and leave me evaporating

8/3/2015 0 comment

A Poem I Wrote That Explains How I Feel Almost Every Day….

by DepressedBitch 8/2/2015

written by DepressedBitch

All my darkest fears rise into the light
Out from the cold place I left them deep down in my soul
I laugh I cry then soon i want to die
Forgetting what it’s like to live
Not knowing how to love life
Repeating this sad cycle
Breathing the same shitty air
Death would be living
This hell we call earth is rotting
I cry tears no longer
I cry blood like 1000 needles pierced my eyes
Caterpillars no longer turn into butterflies
While flowers no longer bloom
My screams become faint
Nobody hears me
Nobody cares
Because nobody’s there
I’m already dead

8/2/2015 1 comment

I’m Not Okay and It’s Not Alright

by MentallyWeak 7/28/2015

written by MentallyWeak

Sometimes I always go into deep thought about my life. Sometimes I feel like i have good days. But then at night i just think. Like, why should i live if i know people dont want me around? Why should i have to live, constantly feeling like people hate me for no reason? Why should I live, knowing there’s no reason to? My mom doesn’t know that i feel this way. But if i try telling her she’ll say im stupid . My guess is that she just doesn’t want to believe that i could feel this way.

My mom is a nurse and she […]

7/28/2015 4 comments

all the bright places

by eeemmmmm515 7/26/2015

written by eeemmmmm515

Anyone ever read tht book, it literally kills me deep inside by mentioning how i actually feel abt death and now it sucks, i cant get over the bk, or, maybe this life, this death thingy .

Wow. Death.

7/26/2015 0 comment

add it to the list

by goylem 7/26/2015

written by goylem

I’ve totally fucked my life. Over the past 7 years I’ve self-injured. At my worst I didn’t care if I lived or died, I just needed an escape. Something to shut up the voice in my head, and let me breathe again. Now I’m almost 20 and the career that I’ve dreamed about my whole life is impossible because of the scars I have. And I understand why it’s a PDQ, but that doesn’t help me not beat myself up for fucking this up. And I also know that my mental instability was caused by circumstances beyond my control and occurred at a time in […]

7/26/2015 0 comment

My Life: Chapter 2 (age 5 to 6/7)

by wndozh8er 7/24/2015

written by wndozh8er

As I said in my pervious post, I was living with my grandparents who i seen and still see as my mother and father. Just before I started kindergarten, my biodad moved a few states away to North Carolina in 1989. I took it very hard and it was like a death to me. I only saw him once a year or so after that.

Then I started kindergarten in the fall of that year. I was scared to death and never was exposed to a lot of children before then. That same year my grandpa on my biomoms side got locked in his bathroom. It […]

7/24/2015 0 comment

July 15, 2015, 1:51 AM

by allisnotwell 7/23/2015

written by allisnotwell

I’m empty, but deep down I feel a very distinct emotion of hate, and sorrow. My mind is very confusing, to say the least. There are trap doors that hide behind old memories collecting dust, and I don’t have a flash light to rummage through broken dreams without being cut. Too bad my scars are not able to completely fade away, I can not hide everything from everyone and I seem to do a shit job at it anyway. But what I find is that the people who notice are the people who really care. I mean, if you “care”, that’s fine, but don’t hang […]

7/23/2015 2 comments

These Voices Won’t Stop

by -M- 7/15/2015

written by -M-

Over the entire 16 years that I have been alive, many people have told me different things. Now you woukd think that all the good things woukd stick with me and make me feel better, but that is not the way that this stupid ball of dirt we live on works. All the negative, mean, and hurtful things have stuck with me and I keep hearing these voices in my head repeating them. I can hear “Are you really that self-centered?” “When you lived with your mom, you were so horrible I alnost didn’t want to come back.” and “I have known you for over […]

7/15/2015 4 comments

I see the beauty

by ariel24 7/12/2015

written by ariel24

My name is Ariel

never really done this, talk about how I feel out in the open with people. I’m 24 been thinking about suicide since I was 16. I haven’t hust thought about it I’ve actually tried a few times. Could never really go thru with it completely. But I’ve tried. The worst part is that I know who I would be hurting, what I would be losing, I see the beauty of life, I see how beautiful the sky is when the sun is slightly shining upon my face, even tho it’s 100 degrees outside. I see the meaning of life In my little […]

7/12/2015 2 comments

Shadowy Realm

by gunnervin 7/11/2015

written by gunnervin

When they fought, I chose not to fight.
When they cried, I thought there is respite.
Amidst the squibbles and squabbles of life,
My kindly nature kept me rife.
But then came doubt I did my self.
I did my nature, I did my health.
I doubted everything I felt,
And on I went to change my self.
I tried to turn the course of the stream.
Not knowing I was only killing a dream,
Of little joys and a profound realm,
On I went on a broken whelm,
For other dreams were going to be at helm.
I had walked too far still mind […]

7/11/2015 1 comment

It’s the beginning of the end and I don’t know where I lost control…

by amzibabi_666 7/8/2015

written by amzibabi_666

That’s a bit of a lie actually, I suppose i can pinpoint where, I just don’t know how…

First off, thank you to those who are reading this craptacular piece of…well crap.

I have read many of the posts on here, and have become completely immersed in other’s stories. Each of you are so important. It’s just a shame I am a spectacular hypocrite. There is no way I could say the same about myself.

I care for others, I seriously do. I care for others so much that I distance myself away. I don’t feel worthy anymore. It is incredibly frustrating and difficult to explain, even in […]

7/8/2015 3 comments

Don’t know

by Guria 7/7/2015

written by Guria

Don’t know where my life is heading me. Don’t evn know how to live. Every thought, each feeling, every emotion is now jumbled up. M into deep darkness…. want to come out of it. Trying…. but not able to. Somebody plsss advice how can i overcome this suicidal feeling. long back i attempted it twice. Aft that gradually everything become settled. But again with his ignorance towards me & getting closer to another lady pulled me back to 7-8 years ago. Same problem is arising again. I cnt evn trust myself now. Hv loose all my hope n wish for death every moment. Each second […]

7/7/2015 1 comment

Why

by Cage 7/6/2015

written by Cage

I’ve been this way for as long as I can remember – A Fake! Walking around…all smiles, but deep down I want to scream.I know, I know…gotta see the glass as half full and all. But then I ask why? I haven’t been suicidal but I’m also not “living the life”. I can try to pick myself up but at the back of my head I ask why. Its tiring. It seems I prefer to be a zombie. I dont have to talk that way. I don’t have to put up with pretenses. People pretending to care. People commenting on trivial shit because […]

7/6/2015 0 comment

So Hard Not to Slosh Around in Self-pity

by almo lothar 6/29/2015

written by almo lothar

I’m about to turn 64.

I worked hard through my professional life to put my son, daughter and nephew through good schools and university and my wife through law school. In 1995, I started my own business in California.

I had some welcome success, putting aside a comfortable nest egg which I thought would carry me through however much time I had left. I was wrong. All the nest egg did was attract the attention of circling sharks.

Beginning in 2008, I made some business decisions which, over the course of the next five years, would cost me virtually everything. A former partner, my personal attorney and an […]

6/29/2015 4 comments

Newer Posts

Older Posts