Suicidal thoughts don’t make you a bad person, or crazy, or weak, or flawed. These thoughts occur to when our pain is greater than we can cope with. Will power has nothing to do with it. If we could cheer ourselves up, we would. We all experience different kinds of pain and we all have different limits. If you ever feel like giving up, just know that you are not alone. There are many of us feeling the same way. But don’t give in, talk to someone first. Talk to a friend, a stranger, talk to me..
Tag:
different
I’m quite young (only twenty) but I feel very alone, let me begin by saying that I have spent most of the last four years by myself going more than a month at a time without seeing or speaking to anyone that I knew just the checkout person at the supermarket asking how I am sometimes I would try to respond but could not find the words, I moved back into the city less than a year ago and things where a little better then when I lived in the country side but things changed quickly, these days when I see people I always feel […]
I haven’t been on this site in almost 2 years.. I thought abt it a lot but never had an opportunity to get on. I’ll fill yu guys in on Wats happened since last time I been here… I was in a foster home in merrillville where I started doing heroin. I got caught and tried to run away but the cops picked me up I was brought to this place called the crisis center (the A house or alternative home) it wasn’t so bad there I actually kind of miss it but of course at the time I hated it but I meet some […]
Robin Williams was so incredibly fortunate to be able to die on his own terms and still have the popular opinion in his favor. It doesn’t seem to be socially acceptable to judge him or call him a coward for what he did. Rather, people are still celebrating his life and all the good he’s done, and this is what we’ll pass down to future generations. They’ll never think seriously about how he died, just his amazing talent and the legacy he left behind. It’s amazing how different it is for so many others who ended their lives.
How do you get over someone? like … how do you get over a breakup or so? How long did it take you to move on? Are you a different person from who you were before the breakup and after your breakup and after you’re healed?
So many posts I read on here, so much loneliness, emptiness, self anger and hatred I wish I/we had the opportunity to meet one another and assist each other through these times. The powers that be know I can use a friend! Were all destined to die eventually its just getting through the “now” that’s so fukin difficult. I know I wish I had an understanding individual to chill with. Well back to my lonely world, to those that plan on killing themselves, good luck and to everyone else I hope you have an understanding friend to turn to!!! Good day all
All I wanted more than anything this weekend was to come home from college, drive the five hours to see my friends and family for my birthday weekend. I now realize it was a bad idea, I was so hypermanic yesterday when I came home, literally haven’t been that happy or excited for anything in ages. I have to leave tomorrow morning and I’m so terribly homesick even though I’m still here. It was like nothing changed, I had a bad nightmare that I was at college and I woke up and everything was okay. I don’t know what to do, I hate it there […]
First post here, or in public at all about how I’m really feeling…
I’ve been depressed and suicidal for years. Been on lots of different meds, admitted and discharged a few times with no improvements, and a few failed suicide attempts too. I’m at a point where I’m seriously looking for something effective, but hopefully not leave a gruesome scene – I don’t want family to find my body hanging when getting home from work or for some poor sod having to pick up pieces of me quickly to keep busy commuters happy…
I may never die. Someone else wearing my DNA, the telomeres shorter — a body built of different atoms; a different organism will die in my stead.
What are we from moment to the next? We are already gone; lost in time. An instant passed inexorably; an individual altered irreversibly; life exists only as a continuum of perpetual chaos.
You are an individual existing for just a moment with the previous moment’s memory.
I don’t know what it is about him that makes me feel worthless n nothing to him I have spinal scoliosis see he doesn’t seem to believe that n sees me as lieing about how much pain I’m in he has been my stepdad for about 10 years since I was in grade school I’m so tired of him I’ve been in pain from my spine n body for about 3 years but lately it’s just been getting worse I don’t know what to do I feel like giving up on life n he doesn’t care for I can see it in his eyes […]
I feel like Cerberus,
The three headed guardian of the gates of Hades.
Yet, each head has a different goal.
But will all end up in the same hole.
One says hold on,
Fight the feeling.
Another says we don’t belong,
We’ve reached our ceiling.
The last one makes the most sense.
And decides not to speak in the past tense.
Each has it’s own tune,
One is that if a siren,
Attractive but deadly,
One is soft and sweet,
Like a summer time medley.
One is loud,
With no discernable cause,
All the while waiting for an applause.
But it will not come,
Because their time may be […]
Sorry I’m different. Sorry I like different music. Sorry I’m not perfect. Sorry I’m bisexual. Sorry I’m depressed. Sorry I have low self esteem. Sorry I hate myself. Sorry I’m a fuck up. Sorry I’m not who you wanted me to be Mum. Sorry I don’t get all A’s. Sorry I’m not smart. Sorry I’m not beautiful. Sorry I don’t get solos in choir. Sorry I waste your money Dad. Sorry I do what I can to get out of the house because I hate it there. Sorry I’m not athletic. Sorry I can’t do everything you want me to do Mum and Dad. Sorry […]
Today felt different. Not really a good or bad different. I went to work today as I had been out the last few days due to the fact I was not mentally able to go. Today was just a strange day. I did my normal routines, handled my normal business. I spoke very little. A couple co-workers told me I was a “bit off” today. They asked if everything was alright. I assured them everything was fine – from my perspective anyways.
The ride home from work was different too. The sun was well past its zenith, the shadows were long, a light breeze in the […]
Most days I want to end it. I don’t have a plan. I don’t dwell on a way out. I just want it all to end.
When I was 12 (I’m 30 now) I first thought about suicide. It seemed romantic. Maybe I’d come back as a ghost – if a somehow fashioned a guillotine then I’d haunt my house like Marie Antoinette. Maybe I’d get to meet god, the real god. As irrational as it sounds, I was curious about death – what was it like on the other side? IS there an other side? That being said, I was also looking for a way out. I […]
Years of pain. Years of searching. Years of planning even. Now, after years of searching,when I have obtained the requirement for my exit I have been advised that they are changing the law here in relation to Advance Directives. There is now some hope that I can have some say in my exit. Could I ask of those of you from different counties and cultures have Advance Directives or Living wills etc worked. I would also advise all to consider this, even when I could see no hope or alleviation of the pain something happened that even slightly lightened my load.
You’re welcome.
It’s funny: people talk about how easy it is to find places on the internet about how to kill yourself. But, when you go looking, there’s actually very little. The “joke” sites far outnumber the serious ones. In fact, the only true serious one I’ve ever found is lostallhope dot com. It alone appears to have serious and well-researched information available on different methods.
But I’m serious about the Vipassana meditation and that book I mentioned. It sounds clichéd to say that “it opened a whole new world for me”, but, well, it opened a whole new world for me. And mindfulness meditation really is […]
Let me ask you a question. Do we like being miserable? I am writing a post on a suicide website. How does that strike the average individual? Obviously there is no such thing as an average individual. Members of this simulacrum of grief, of this meeting place of agony, come from very diverse and varied backgrounds. Some may get help and move on. I’m willing to bet a small percent have actually killed themselves. But why does any of this matter? Well nothing matters. You have seen a person on their last day. What does a person on their last day look like? Usually unremarkable. […]
I guess it’s a bit different. People can get along. But will I ever do the same?
What makes one sane? A bunch of standardised tests for differentiated individuals?
Disorganised and depressed thoughts for the last 4 years. And I’m not even 18.
Maybe I just had a rough day. But, I’ll never be able to talk to y’all the same way.
Sorry for wasting your time. I just felt the need to turn to someone/something. Cause I have a bad tendency to turn to self abuse when I feel low or disappointed or mad at myself.
Posted in here weeks ago, had severe depression from chronic pain and could see no end.
Out of the blue I was contacted by someone who wants the same as me, but for different reasons.
Was a total shock to me to even get a response and to speak to someone so determined to go through with it.
They are interstate and will be travelling up tomorrow to work out the details of how/when etc.
It’s never ending. Every time I recover I get hit with another blow. I’ve made it through trial after trial, never knowing how I ended up on the other side alive. I’m not going to tell my life’s story in my first post on this site, but I will give some insight. I’ve lived the majority of my life alone. What time I was around people; “family”, shelters, fosters, etc.; I always felt different, unwelcome, crazy. I’ve contemplated my death since the beginning of my memories, in a way it fascinates me. I’ve just never had the balls to actually go through with it, I […]