i have never felt this hopeless before. i just want it all to go away and i can only think of suicide. i always told myself that i would never do it however its all ive been thinking about lately. its always on my mind. i just want the pain and the hopelessness to go away. im such a failure in life. i have nothing going for me. the only reason why ive stayed this long is for my little sisters and my boyfriend other than that i would have been gone a long time ago. but right now im scared because lately i have […]
Tag:
Failure
I want to give up I want to kill myself. I’ve worked out a couple of ideas jump from the story bridge, take all the pills I have (I’ve got about50) or/and hang myself. Jumping feels like the most reliable. Anyway can someone just tell me to give up, I’m sick of the supporting comments it stops me from acting on my impulses. So please if you’re going to comment tell me to end of everything. Tell me everything’s pointless. Tell me il be a failure and a nobody for the rest of my miserable life and I should accept my inevitable fate
I’m a 16 year old boy who is thinking about Suicide all the time, doesn’t matter where i am or what i’m doing. I don’t have a standard story, mabye i can cry about having disvorced parents or being bullied in primary school but that aren’t really reasons i contemplate about suicide. I’ve never had therapy, i think none knows how i am… I’ve tried a “online” therapy “test” and as diagnosis came out i am severely depressed. I’ve propably been depressed since i was 14 but none saw it, neither did i.
When i read post on this site i always see the sentence: Life gets better, […]
I don’t know why I let myself fail to the point that I do. I know I can put more effort into bettering my life but every time I try putting forth any effort I am only met by failure and worthlessness. I am unable to even comply with basic day to day situations sometimes and I need to trudge through it knowing that it is only me myself who is keeping me back. I’m being pushed through a hole of the wrong shape to fit in with everything so extremely fake around me, yet had this been a different world my inferiority would have […]
I have a learning disability and right now I’m attending a university. I did the best I can to do well in school. Sadly, seems like I was not smart enough for anything. Thus, I need to end this life. I will miss my parents and my siblings, but I’m a complete failure. I did the best I can in school. I study every day and never play video games much. I know its wrong for me, but the student loans and my failure makes me want to escape this cursed world. I was not meant to be born in this world. There had to […]
I can’t stop it anymore. I feel like shit all the time.
I think I might.
I might.
I Probably…
               Will try until I fail.
I don’t know how or when. So don’t ask.
I won’t plan it. It will happen by itself.
…. I feel like failing.
That night…tall grass bathed in moonlight. The stars sparkle brightly as the North Pole’s breath travels down to where we are and dances across your cheek. Tall grass and white flowers..in that place  next to the brook and that wise old tree. We would stretch out between the roots under the spot where you carved our initials when we were young. The place where we fell in love, where you first tried to kiss me and I pulled away and ran as you chased me until i tripped over a secret root and you fell on top of me. Dear God we were only 13 and 14 […]
This one’s pretty long, sorry if I bore anyone. I should preface by saying that I’ve been depressed for four years. I was formally diagnosed with major depressive disorder January of this year, but I knew long before. I’ve never had a true friend, anything even close to a relationship (been led on a few dozen times), and I feel alone constantly. Recently my diagnosis was changed to suggest the cause of my pain is ADD. I’m not sure if the doctors are right, but amphetamines are helping a bit lately. This is the story of the last eight months or so, from the first […]
I just cant see a reason to go on.
I have lost everything in the recession. I was lucky and found a new job in a new place. I found a job I loved. I was a respected professional. I was doing so well. Had my life back on track. I befriended a coworker. We were both in a new city and both new with the company.
I had a new home with a yard for my dogs. Slowly our friendship grew and we both helped each other to do amazing at our new jobs. I started […]
Hi,
let me get straight to the point im a normal boy who is determined to have something that satisfy me. I was sponsored in a university i left my country 3wks ago and i arrived in a different world so when i got in i had one thing in my mind (i am number one). Then those goofs said that i should take theology i protested by saying i am not interested with islamic theology. I called my parents they were dissapointed but they said (study my son i know u can do this) i accepted it and another shocking news is that i […]
The only reason I am living is for others. My family, friends, and people I dont even know. I would have committed suicide by now, but ive told my friend not to tell anyone so if i end up doing it the burden will be on his shoulders. I dont know what to do. I havent told my parents or anything because i cant face them. I am a coward they would feel terrible, they would feel failure as parents if i told them. My life seems to have no meaning. Seems that nothing can make me happy. When something does make me happy it […]
So there I was, a couple days back – sitting alone thinking oncemore about how shitty my life is (I’m in my 20’s, have a university degree, but no one will give me a job, im lacking in major social skills and have never had a GF – still a virgin and havent had any friends for years). 90% of my time outside of my house has been to the Doctor or my Therapist.
To digress, I’m sitting here and decide to “take some pills” (i wont detail everything). I take a few (slightly more than Ive done before just when Ive felt bad), then I […]
I try so hard to get my life back on track. It seems that whenever good happens in my life something 10X worst follows: i just can’t get a break. I don’t really have any friends, I’ve never had a girlfriend nor could I ever hope to future with one since I started going bald and became impotent at 22 and now I’m 26, even cialis doesn’t work. I’m studying a field that I’m not passionate and nearly flunked out my first year. I did better my following years but it will nearly impossible to get into grad school. I still live with my parents […]
Lights off. Ears plugged. Doors locked. Notes placed. Water running. Blade cutting. Perfect. All according to plan.
Lights fading. Consciousness slipping. Room spinning. Parents sleeping. Blood pouring. Finally. Time to go.
No more. The End. Black. Infinite black. Peace. Calm. Eternity.
Then noise. Faint. Distant. A hum. A buzz. Audible only because it it the only sound in the beautiful void.
The hum won’t stop. Won’t go away. Won’t leave me alone. I have to find out what it is. What is it anyway!? Look around. Just black.
Wait, I didn’t look around. I couldn’t. There is only black. Maybe if I open my eyes. Then I could find the source […]
The fabric of my life.
“It’s dying, It’s dying!” They all cry,
Your heart got far too close to mine,
And now it’s ripping, breaking inside,
My body breathes a sigh of relief as it’s time.
I can hear it in the wind, I can feel it on my skin,
“Just one more time, you’ll feel much better ” I can’t let these voices in.
“Please don’t desert us, we were always there for you,
On those lonely nights when you were lost and didn’t know who to turn to.
Self harm? No harm! What harm can it do? They take me away cause they know it hurts you.”
Now she’s […]
Reading through the posts, its amazing how different all our stories are.
We have somethings in common – that feeling of not being able to carry on, hating our lives, hating our past, not feeling like we have a future.
How many of you have read anothers story and thought either:
Thats far worse than my life,
or
thats not so bad?
It something to think about – if we put ourselves in other peoples lives how would we feel then, worse or better than we do now.
If one can get one spirits up just a little – its really important.
Having severe PTSD (post traumatic stress), having a nervous […]
I’ve failed.
at so many things.
life, mostly. work. people. I’m consumed by the pointlessness of it all, now, too. I can’t see a way out. And nothing makes sense.
I just want it all to go away.
One way or another.
the truth is that..i still feel this way all the time.i dont have a girlfriend i can afford..i cant afford to even kal a girl that just acceptd my proposals i am as broke as a dinosaurs fossil.i am sliding into depression jst from making this comment.a girl once fainted in my arms at home.but i couldnt afford the simplest form of transportation around this parts,i couldnt get her to the hospital or anything.i was called a curse to the economy.i can hardly afford my meals so i am staying with my parents,this to a great lenght have stopped me from being who i am,truth […]
While I share a variety of similar issues and reasons for being depressed than most of you here; I’ve recently come to realize that as time has gone by, one of the main reasons for me wanting to die has become, as shallow but sincere as it sounds: PRIDE. Yes. Before this crisis (I’ve had many) started I used to be looked up to and even though I paid a very high price to mantain an image of myself that wasn’t quite real, I felt semi-comfortable and semi-proud to be there. But now, ever since people have learned about my failure, the girl is no […]