My sister doesn’t know y I sleep so long.. I literally have no reason to get out of bed especially when all she does is make me feel worse accuses me of everything blames me for her nd gordy fighting tells me I’m useless that I’m not shit lik y the fuck would I wanna get up if that’s all that’s gonna happen I’m starting to break Idk Wat to do tbfh Idk how to make my fucking life better
Tag:
feel
Do you ever feel like you have no reason for being. Almost like you were just left on earth to wonder why you have to live in the first place.
I mean I have tried to feel like everyone happy like things are simple, but WHY i mean I tried college I try to work hard and it almost seems people
go out of their way just to make you feel like shit. Then you find one thing to hold onto and it becomes toxic like helping family or friends. you put your heart and soul into trying to be level headed and peaceful for them and […]
So I’m only 12, nearly 13. I feel like dying each day. No one knows I want to die. I darnt say anything incase of being called an attention seeker. Some of my friends know I self harm:( they are always there for me. I’m really self conscious, like I don’t like people looking at me. It’s because I’m pretty fat and ugly. I hate the way I am. I try to change but I can’t. Most people seem to hate me because I’m different, I have bright coloured hair, I’m quiet, I’m not out goibg im clever, I’m different. IM FULL BLOWN WEIRD. Everyone’s […]
Only been out of the house 2 hours and feel like I could sleep for a week! Why is it like this?!!!!! I hate it!! Always tired yet struggle to sleep 🙁
Two weeks ago I left the psych ward after three months of trying to recover from depression and anxiety. Before I left, the shrinks there questioned me about how my three month stay had helped me. I lied, told them it changed something, told them it had made a difference, told them that “it taught myself a lot about me”. In truth, nothing has changed, but I didn’t have the balls to tell them about it. I felt like I had just wasted a quarter year of my life twiddling thumbs. I still feel anxious. I still feel depressed. I still feel like I could […]
Hi everyone.
I’m new to this site. I don’t know what I’m looking for or what I want because at the minute I don’t feel anything. I guess I want to be able to write things to people who have more chance of understanding. I had a couple of years of feeling I was making progress and on a path to happiness, but recently I feel so depressed and flat I have no emotion I’m just here. I used to cut and have tried to kill myself a few times. I just feel like I’m floating around struggling to concentrate and do my job well. I […]
I think its time for me to open up. I want to tell my mom but I don’t know how to. I was about 14 when I was rapped. I thought she was my friend, but I guess wrong. She said that if I didn’t let her, she would kill me. I was scared for my life that I let it happen. I feel like it’s my fault, I shouldn’t have let it happen. I would go into detail on how it happen, but I don’t think anyone wants to read about that. I feel like if I tell my mom she might blame herself […]
I’ve been unhappy since I can remember. Sometimes I forget, that I’m unhappy in certain situations, but it never lasts longs and I quickly get back to my normal state of depression. It’s really hard for me to find thinks that I find enjoyable enough to make an effort to experience them.
I have always wondered what was wrong with me. I studied some psychology and read a lot of self-help books. I made some progress, but I never understood why, despite my seemingly great live, I felt so worthless. Yesterday I stumbled upon the TED talks by Brene Brown and I finally realized what my […]
Why is it that every damn time I try to escape all the fuckin memories and flashbacks they come on harder?… Why is it that the more I try to feel the more numb I become?.. These are answers I will NEVER have.. So why does My mind want to constantly fuckin trap me in this twisted fuckin bull shit with no escape?.. None but the one that EVERYONE considers “wrong” .. I have so much anger!!!!!!!!!
I sometimes feel as if I can not tell the difference between actual reality and the one in my mind. I think the worst of people and their intentions. I want to trust. Especially when people are seeming to earn it and be found deserving of my trust. However I can not shake the feeling that it is all just an elaborate act. I don’t like people. I used to. Not so much anymore. Maybe that’s just because of the people in my life that love me, spend their time and energy on me and have no idea who I really am and how dark […]
there’s a different kind of tired
not the kind when you haven’t slept
or you’ve run two miles
or you haven’t eaten in hours
it’s the kind you can feel
behind your eyes
your neck
your shoulders
your chest
your knees
everywhere
when you’ve just had enough of being knocked down by it all
and the only cure is sleep
but not even that cures
because you know when you wake
you’ll be tired all over again
so you just drift through everything
tired.
Why is it that everytime I turn around someone’s telling me that I put myself in this place? I dug myself this hole and I’m keeping myself 10feet under.. If I could for one day feel “normal” (whatever society considers that) then I would be in a heart beat but I don’t ask to see think and feel the things I do. I don’t ask for the flashbacks or nightmares and I don’t ask for the emptiness.. But whatever maybe it’s something I deserve maybe and fuck being “normal”
Since suicide by starvation alone takes a considerable amount of time, ive decided to drink smal doses of anti freeze mixed into my gatorade, i posted yesterday stating i was beginning the starvation process but ive actually been on it for 5 days so far including today. ive gone fr 170lbs to 161lbs so far and feel like death figuratively, but thats probably due to taking my anti anxiety meds without food. Like many of you i wanted the least painful way to go. I dont suggest these methods. i will update with how the antifreeze affects my body in a couple of days.
Sometimes I wonder what the point of all of this is? When those thoughts start running through my mind I can’t help but wonder what it would be like if I ended it all. However, I don’t want to hurt the small amount of people that actually care about me which is why I haven’t and probably wont ever do it. It’s still depressing to have all of these thoughts. I really wish I didn’t. On some level I feel guilty and I feel like maybe I’m taking everything for granted. Compared to others my life is pretty normal I suppose. At least now it […]
It’s funny how we all live in this huge world to be known by some but feel forgotten by everyone. I walk in the streets and they may see my smile but they’ll never know my stories.. They’ll never know the truth behind this face. All the lies of happiness and all the stories of fake laughter. When will be the day that people can see beyond the “joyful” eyes and see what’s really beneath it all <\3
Yet again, I can’t trust anyone. My “friend” left me last night cause I told her what I trully was. She said she can’t be friends with someone who’s depressed and stopped talking to me all together. I just feel like shutting myself from the world and go mute. I’ll just talk in sigh language when I have to.just completely shut myself from the world and hopefully die before I’m 20 🙁
You wake up in the morning – happy as can be. You strive in life to put a smile on anothers’ face, but struggle to put one on your own. The evening comes and the thoughts wander in – What if…wouldn’t it be great…how would others react it…
Ive been through this website a few times as I struggled to keep myself from making a second attempt. I read about how others feel, the struggles they go through, the stories that match mine.
Having a constant loss of happiness is the worst pain. The moments spent creating little notes and looking up various ways of attempting. The […]
I was born into relatively lower middle class family. My mother is an school teacher all her life and my dad is an alcoholic since forever working in construction. Ive born into a small town, with no opportunites and with no financial aid, I attended the school and finished by graduating 12 classes. As a kid I played used to enjoy playing football or just pass time as a computer which is most of my whole life. But If I were to defy myself Im incredibly shallow, no confidence/self esteem, have not felt anything in years, no-one to care for or something to hold value […]
I am clumsy oath. I have no feel. I tried to massage my mother. I do not seem to feel anything. What am I good at? What am I doing here?
My ideas get rejected. I cannot even do a simple university assignment. I want to leave my university. My ego wants me to stay even I know really well I am going to kick out.
I like being alone because I feel even more alone with the people around me.
I am tired. I want all this to stop. I just don’t have the guts or energy to end this. THe world has come […]
So as you can see you already know what i’m about to talk about, yeah i might be young but sex as a different meaning for me the more the half of the other my age younger or older, yes i’m a virgin but it’s really sad seeing sex just becoming what its becoming today as weird as it may seems sex is a gift, i see i as a gift, a gift to your husband and wife and it’s kinda the reason why i want to stay a virgin till marriage (lol if i’m not dead ) but yeah i always tough of sex […]