Been thinking about suicide for a while because it seems like everything I do in like bites me in the Ass,I cant do anything right Ican’t make anyanyone happy including myself feel my last hope is death….ill misss my family but I think they will be better off
Tag:
feel
Its hard knowing that you’re never good enough and it’s harder to know that every body actually think the same.
Sometimes it would be great knowing that people believe in you. Sometimes it would be great to also not feel worthless, it would be good to not feel like a total shit. Sometimes it would be great knowing that things you do aren’t complete shit. Sometimes it would be great to not wake up everyday of your life thinking about ending it all.
Sometime just sometimes i wish wishes came true, so i could wish knowing that it might come true, […]
Coma baby,
With your sick head
The doctors saved you
But you’re still dead
And through your scalp
I would like to reach in
So I could pull out
The monster you’ve been
And you would do anything to
Destroy the body that they rescued
Your sick little head
So brain damaged
And lying in that hospital bed
Coma baby
The cry of your bones
And your skull when it
Split on the road
I wish I’d find all
The lonely remnants
From your head
When it cracked open
And you would do anything to
Destroy the body that they rescued
Your sick little head
So brain damaged
For the past 6 years I have suffered from severe depression and social anxiety. There has never been a good time in my life. Before I even developed mental illnesses my Dad was an abusive asshole to my mother and sometimes to me and my siblings. I’ve never had a true friend, I click with no one and relate with no one. I’ve been in therapy for about 3 years now and it seems like nothing is getting better. I left school on the first day of last year because of how bad things were getting; I just couldn’t handle it any longer.
So basically all I’ve been […]
Sometimes this helps. Just a little bit, when my feelings are tumultuous, anxiety is creeping through me and my stress levels are rising. I am overwhelmed by everything or nothing at all and It feels like I am at melting point, but I just want to stop feeling. To evaporate into thin air and just simply cease to be. Away from everything and everyone.
I Stop and I breath. Close your eyes if that helps, but breath in and out slowly. Concentrate on the air, going in and out, feel your chest rising gently and feel a wave of relaxation roll through your body, slowly washing over every […]
I’m lost, confused; angry at myself, yet I portray my anger at others to hide my insecurities. I am a sadist, I hate it. I hate it so much, yet I can’t help it. I want to stop hurting, but I cannot control myself. I made my mother cry today. I blamed her for what I am, I blamed her for who she is. She always let’s me do whatever I want. She never says no. Nor does she ever try to stop me. Does she care? I push limits, boundaries, nothing I do phases her. I wipe my feet all over this woman and […]
Seeing as the nights are simply growing colder no matter the weather outside the glass or the amount of sheets I attempt to crawl beneath, I find myself here again. From time to time, this feeling engulfs my body only to later show the stressing of my seams. Dearest, the shadows I live with are numberless; and, as if this statement werent true enough as is, I am a walking suicidal anomaly with as many wounds as demons to show for.
My body is a constant reminder of the years of drug abuse and self inflicted torture. There isn’t a day I awake to feel regret […]
Ever since I was little I dealt with a tumultuous relationship between my mom, my dad and my brothers. I’ve been abused my whole life. I use sex as a way to feel loved. I’ve had over 15 sex partners and I’m not even 18. I hate my brother most of all. He rubs his achievements in my face like he’s better than me. He makes fun of me cuz I had to stay back my freshman year of high school. I do recreational drugs to numb how I feel. But sometimes, I just want to die. I don’t want to feel anything anymore and […]
I am 22 and I feel like I am living because I have 2, since I was a child I always knew I was different from the other kids, I was always wondering about death and where I will go… my parents got divorced when I was a kid, I actually don’t remember anything of that, but I remember being raped… since then I have been a lonely person and I am really afraid of relationships with guys , I had friends, but for some reason I ended up cutting the relationships with them, is like, a lot of people know who you are but […]
I love pens. I love finding them on the ground or on a desk and taking them for myself. I don’t know what it is about having a lot of pens that makes me feel good. I just bought 108 pens on Amazon just now for pretty cheap. I feel guilty, though, because I am from a very poor family that never had the money to buy pens or pencils for school. We’d have a few that we used, the rest were my dad’s pens which we couldn’t use since he wanted to keep them for himself. Maybe I get it from my dad. I […]
Oh goodness I am so tired of people telling me I have a drug problem. I do not. My Mentor told me, “If anyone takes a substance to not feel, then that’s a problem.” I’m sorry I feel so sad all the time and am worried about other things, that I take pain pills to deal with it, and I cut myself to deal with it. I don’t know what else to do when I am so down in the dumps. I don’t know what to do. If I do have a problem, so what? No one is going to ‘help’ this poor 16 year […]
the people on here, this website, are true sufferers- they are drowning in poverty, surrounded by nothing but their own crushing thoughts and self-accusations. they have reason to scream and sob and choke on depression.
i am 16, popular, a brilliant student, a violin prodigy (slight hyperbole), an extrovert, horror movie addict. my parents are established- “dad” has a Ph.D, mom is a retail genius. we are upper-middle class, gorgeous home. i’m an only child so they shower money on me; where else will they dump their earnings?
the question to ask, then, is: am i allowed to be so sad? why should i have the right […]
i can feel the sting as the blood trickles down my arms
i can feel the water rushing in my nose, my ears, my lungs
i can feel the rope tightening and my breath slowing down
i can feel the wind whipping past after i step off
i can feel so strongly that i sometimes feel nothing at all
2 months before my 18th birthday i developed a horrendous condition called tinnitus, which is ringing in the ears or head. At first, although it was very bad, it didn’t cause me any issues, but it did never stop or go away. as the weeks went on my anxiety began to build, i couldn’t sleep and i was in a constant state of unprecedented despair. eventually the inevitable happened, i developed depression and life became unbearable. i couldn’t concentrate in school, dreaded and avoided social situations (including my 18th birthday) and could not stand anybody. But to cut a long story short i overcame this […]
i can’t stop crying. the thoughts are never going to go away.
i question why i feel this way because i have it way better than most people do,
i have a home , a bed , clothes , food , but i just feel so shitty and utterly worthless.
im afraid that im just gunna fail in life and what sucks the most is i have nobody.
i dont need friends but sometimes its just nice to have someone to understand you and
just listen. being alone just sucks.
I was intoxicated by the feeling in the air, faint wisps of pizza and beer filling my being.
It was a graduate program alright, but the campus itself reeked of undergrad shenanigans. Most people find it gaudy, but I love the community atmosphere of a uni campus. It’s a sexually incestuous band of merry vagabonds, topped off with general studies classes that force a modicum of higher thinking that is generally expressed in smoke filled dorm rooms. Well, at least a chemically induced impulse to think outside the box.
Logging more hours than I care to think about on the road to the university, my mood was […]
You make me the happiest, but you make me the worst. With you I feel Complete but I also feel lost. I need you in my live but you make it harder to fight. I’d do everything, even If that means ruin myself for you.
Few weeks ago I stumbled on this website while researching on how to commit suicide and different ways to do so. I was in a very dark place in my life where I felt like suicide was the way to go.
I have felt emotionally depressed over a year ago when my boyfriend at the time and I broke up. At the time, I felt like the whole world was crashing down. I started to fail dramatically in school by not attending classes and not paying attention. I never had good relationship with my family because I was always a disappointment to them (no I didn’t just […]
This is my first time using a site like this, i have always felt weak if i tried getting help, i have had depression for 7 years. I have been able to control my bad thoughts most of this time with distraction methods, this only works so much of the time, when I’m at my lowest nothing can distract me from the pain i feel, i struggle to put in to words what it is that makes me feel this way.
The main cause i suppose is my life being an absolute mess, everything i do goes wrong, every time i try and make my life […]
This is my first time on here. I don’t even know what I am doing. I have suicidal thoughts. I am 40 years old nd feel as though I havn’t amounted to much in this life. I feel like a complete loser. Lost my main source of income a year or so ago. No retirement or savings of any kind. The reason I lost my job is making it very very difficult to get another one. It was my life and passion. I don’t feel that my friends and colleagues listen to me or respect me enough. I am always wrong and whenever I have […]