Tag:

find

confused mainly tired

by E 9/6/2014

written by E

Im not sure were to start I’ve read a few posts here before but nothing more. For nearly three years I’ve wanted to die. I’ve attempted 4times only twice officially. I’ve had a mild drug problem for a year or so i think.

Im not really looking for pity or nothing im just tired im tired of it all. Im always looking for new methods as oding never works but i think what i need is a partner I’ve never been brave enough to die alone

planning on trying again after a special event in November. That should give me enough time to find someone who’ll come […]

9/6/2014 4 comments

Peaceful Pill – PEOPLE SHOULD NOT BE FORCED TO SUFFER

by JadedGuy 9/6/2014

written by JadedGuy

ANIMALS ARE PUT DOWN AND GIVEN PEACEFUL DEATHS WHEN THEY ARE IN PAIN AND HUMANS ARE FORCED TO SUFFER AND ARENT EVEN ALLOWED TO WILLINGLY AND PEACEFULLY END THEIR OWN LIFE IT MAKES ME FURIOUS JUST ANOTHER REASON I HATE THIS FUCKING WORLD AND HUMANITY. ….ANYWAYS I found online a pill called the peaceful pill and it is supposed to be the best way to go and i am so happy i found it it would give me great peace of mind knowing i could be able to use this method….does anybody know about this pill ,how i can get it (from what i have […]

9/6/2014 8 comments

Final Goodbye

by Scarlett Dawn 9/5/2014

written by Scarlett Dawn

Tonight is my final night

I bid you all farewell and hope you find contentment and serenity in this life

We shall meet once more in the afterlife

This is my final goodbye xxx

9/5/2014 12 comments

by HereticBlood 9/4/2014

written by HereticBlood

Dear mind,

Dear mind, why do you present me with the same old questions I can never find an answer for ?…

Dear mind, why do you continuously spin and make me feel like this room of silence is a room full of sin?

Dear mind, why do you continue to play these scenes and make me hear all these foul things?

Dear mind, please let me escape just this one night, so maybe I can find some sort of fight??

****found the [edit] button sorry

9/4/2014 7 comments

my agenda

by 14days2live 9/3/2014

written by 14days2live

If I went back a year in time i would have certainly made many more drastic decisions that would have prevented me from getting to this point in life, and yet here I am. I have everything to live for, except for the will or enthusiasm. one year ago today i fell into a fugue state that has kept me from feeling anything. I am operating only on my left brain. The analytical side. The smart side. The correct side. And I am finally i am considering its intentions. I am considering that in one year if i am still alive i will only wish […]

9/3/2014 1 comment

Angel with broken wings

by kramdragon 8/31/2014

written by kramdragon

You know that girl with the beautiful face,

Cute little body, not a hair out of place?

She’s always the first one to tell you a joke,

Share her advice, or give your ego a stroke.

Her smile can brighten anyone’s day.

She seems so perfect in every way.

Don’t forget she’s so smart and so strong.

You’d never know that you were so wrong.

You don’t notice the scars on her wrists

Or the pain that’s hiding behind hazel eyes.

Makeup covers the brushes from his fists,

While the truth is covered up with her lies.

She really believes that she deserves this.

After all, it’s been like this her whole life.

As a little girl she survived

Strange […]

8/31/2014 3 comments

Paralyzed

by lifelight 8/31/2014

written by lifelight

Hi everyone,

I’m not sure if anyone will read this or care but I’ve accepted that boiling up my demons inside of me is not the answer, so here’s my story.

I’ve only felt this while for a little over the year, and I’m not exactly sure what triggered it. I have a stable family, a stable education, and a stable set of friends. I have a roof over my head and I have a lot to be thankful for. But I had one sad day too many, and one day I just collapsed into this mindset. And I haven’t gotten out.

I wrote a paragraph of reasons […]

8/31/2014 6 comments

Update on me xoxo

by sbkstep43 8/31/2014

written by sbkstep43

Well I haven’t posted on here because I thought life was getting better but I saw I was living for others intead of myself and that I’m alone i feel all broken and weak so now I’m trying to find myself and what I want do because I have to decide which college I am going apply to by December and hopefully I survive my last year of pre med ( if I go back)

Recovery has been hard but I have been clean for almost two years , no drinking no cutting and actually eating so I’m somewhat proud of myself

In conclusion this […]

8/31/2014 0 comment

<3

by HereticBlood 8/31/2014

written by HereticBlood

I just wanted to say that with today being my first day on here I’m glad to know I’m not so alone in these feelings… I truly hope we can all find happiness!

8/31/2014 2 comments

Failed at Death

by EvilKitten 8/31/2014

written by EvilKitten

Last week I slit my wrists, all the way up my arms, multiple times. Anywhere I saw a vein, I sliced hard and fast. Amazingly it didn’t hurt. Earlier that day I went to the store and bought a brand new kitchen knife, for exactly this purpose.

I’m still alive. I cut myself so badly that I turned my bathtub full of water dark red. I saw the blood spurting out of my veins. I wished for death. Irritatingly, my veins stopped bleeding after only a short time. So I found veins on my legs and ankles to slice up. I’m fair skinned, so finding them […]

8/31/2014 8 comments

Finality

by nozmoking 8/30/2014

written by nozmoking

I’ve wasted much of the past fourteen years being lost in the pain of losing someone I cherished more than anyone. Some of you have seen the details puked out here on SP and I won’t go into them again – suffice it to say I gave my life to someone who decided it was more in their best interest to dump me in the gutter and run off with a child molester.

I’ve not had any contact with her for several years, at which time she got in touch with me for reasons still unknown. I made it clear I knew all the secrets, even […]

8/30/2014 4 comments

I’m Not Very Intelligent

by TwistedSpace 8/30/2014

written by TwistedSpace

I wish I was a Blonde, that way I’d have something to match my stupidity down to a tee. I feel that people wouldn’t expect as much from me if they saw I was Blonde. I also wish I was a trust fund baby who didn’t need to work a day in her life. I wouldn’t mind taking shit for it, because I’d be too rich to care. People say I can be pretty smart, but I don’t see it. My grammar sucks; I don’t know a thing about it, honestly. I just repeat what I see from reading. And about reading, it takes me […]

8/30/2014 6 comments

Struggling to find a reason

by dysphoria 8/29/2014

written by dysphoria

I’ve had mental and emotional problems starting at a young age, and I thought I knew how to control them (I was sadly mistaken). Instead of seeing my problems through, I would bury them deep down and dismiss them completely.

That used to work for me, but as I get older and more mature, it’s becoming harder and harder.

The smallest of things will trigger my downward spiral of depression and suicidal thoughts and I’m at a point where I’m scared of what might happen.

I have no money, or insurance, but I have been actively seeking help at local mental clinics.

I really struggling to keep hope/faith in […]

8/29/2014 2 comments

Simple Questions

by depressednihilist95 8/29/2014

written by depressednihilist95

What do you do when someone who you love leaves your life forever, and you never feel that same way with anyone ever again?

What do you do when you find out you love someone much too late?

8/29/2014 1 comment

the whispers of my sins

by theWhispersOfMySins 8/29/2014

written by theWhispersOfMySins

I watched the sun go down today
And I felt a surge of tears
With a sense of desolation
I was overwhelmed with fears

I saw my hope on the horizon
And I saw it fade away
With desperation I tried to believe
That there would be another day

And then suddenly I realized
That my hope was still there
It was just clouded over
With my feelings of despair

Then I began to wonder
Why am I still here
And in my own self doubt I saw
The creation of all my fear

In order to see the sun come up
I would have to search and find

8/29/2014 4 comments

One constant thing is sp

by sunflower 8/26/2014

written by sunflower

Somehow i always end up back here… back to my blog thats held my darkest secrets. I guess i find some comfort in that sp will always be here to listen. ive turned to tumblr recently which ive been venting on… but on here its different. every time i come on i feel like ive lost a battle; except this time i can truthfully say i dont want to die; i have so much more living to do… but i am so sad. i’m lonely and i hate feeling this way. I feel anxious all the time, i feel helpless, alone and i hate living […]

8/26/2014 1 comment

what’s wrong with me?

by dolliexbabes 8/26/2014

written by dolliexbabes

there’s a feeling I get every time a friend asks me to hang out. I often get short of breath my my heat races. I get hot and my head starts to pound. but why?
why is it that even though I want to hang out, I always find my self making excuses.
is it because I’m afraid they will ask me why in wearing a long sleeve shirt in 100 degree weather?
is it because they will comment about my pale face a bags under my eyes?

I don’t know what’s wrong with me..

8/26/2014 4 comments

help

by lovemyshihtzu 8/26/2014

written by lovemyshihtzu

been trying to die since I was three, I tried to hang myself by a rope on a swing set. my entire life has been depressing. I knew happiness for a short time but that person gave up on me and left. every time I’ve overdosed, someone always found me. now that I am stuck living alone, no one should find me right away, but I don’t have the access to those prescription pills anymore. I want to try asphyxiation or strangling but having trouble figuring out how to tie these knots. also don’t rope but have scarfs, belts, shoelaces, bed sheets clothes…help

8/26/2014 0 comment

Another reason

by kramdragon 8/24/2014

written by kramdragon

Another day, another reason to live.

Another way, another reason I give.

Today is my Mother’s birthday. It’s also another day where I have changed my mind about ending my life. All the wheels were set in motion, all of the plans were made. Then I was reminded of what today was. I worry about what my death will do to my mother on a normal day, but I can’t use her birthday. So today is just another failed attempt.

It was so peaceful this week, planning everything leading up to today. Now that I know I have to live on another day my world has come crashing […]

8/24/2014 3 comments

Session 19: Read between the lines.

by R3T31D 8/24/2014

written by R3T31D

Part of me still hopes for a safe resolution, maybe find someone that is not a religious crack head to try to repair me? Is just false hope, I know that. I’ve known that for some time. I wonder why I kept holding on to this noise. I knew that everyone was going to walk away, to move on.

Everyone moves on, in the end we are nothing but memories that linger in time and eventually fade into nothing. Unless you find one of those people that can never forget. If such a thing even exists.

I’ve been researching more locations in the area that […]

8/24/2014 4 comments

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