Why do you want to die why not talk over some pie or we can just get high oh its illegal thats why lets just talk over pie lets forget about lifes lies, talk about the fallacies of our mind the pain that you just cant be left behind or maybe you can say just say hi dont be shy tell me why you want to die I kinda ran outta pie by the way my name is guy
Tag:
high
I guess I’m back. Last time I was here I was in high school. Now I’m in my second year of college and not one thing has changed. My uncle, his wife, and his son came down for the 4th this week. I haven’t seen them in 3 years. I hardly know them. They never come around. Well none of that matters. Just a minute ago my Grandmother told me that my uncle said I was “Anti-social”. It hurt. I tried to talk. I gave my best. They think I’m weird, but weird is good to me. I lost all my friends from high school […]
Today my cousin and I were on the swings at an old elementary school. I was listening to music when we closed our eyes to swing back and forth. My cousin later asked me what depression felt like and I told him if he remembered what it was like to close his eyes on the swing. How you never knew how high you were, and it didn’t matter because you always felt the same. That’s what depression is like. No matter how high you are you’ll always feel close to the ground. Falling backwards.
A few years ago I was high on life. Had a good job, 2 great kids, a home, 2 cars. Seemed like the perfect life. Then i met this guy. He cheated on me, beat me, raped me. The list goes on and on. When I tried to break up with him he would kick my door in or break a window. I felt i had no choice but to give in. I sent my kids to live with there father (I did it for them but now they hate me). I tried to kill myself. Waking up in shock trauma was not fun. I gave […]
It’s all too fucking much for me…I seem to fail at everything.
I failed in school and high school
I’ve failed in love
I’ve failed at sports
I’ve failed to achieve a normal social life
I’ve failed to continue my musical career because of being a pathetic,self-hating idiot
I’ve failed as a son
I’m only a financial burden on my family,who’s still keeping my useless ass in high school,and for what?I’ll just end up working at a McDonalds for minimum salary and spend all my money on drugs.I know I’ll just disappoint them,like I do with everyone…
I disappointed them when they found out about my mental problems…They wanted a normal son,not this […]
I have never felt sad about a suicide. By the time I graduated high school, two of my best friends had killed themselves and even at that young age I never felt sad. Confused, yes. But in my heart I knew that suicide marks the end of a problem, and so… much like divorce in the case of an abusive marriage, it’s a good thing even though humans instinctively say “how awful”.
Humans at large cannot perceive the problem, so all they see is the solution which they don’t agree with. If you didn’t know that a woman was being mugged, and all you saw was […]
Im 26 today. Every day i live is another day i pray to die. How fucked up is that. I keep praying to god that he’ll just take me his own way. Car accident. Heart attack. Allergic reaction. The flu. Some crazy disease. Cancer. Being hit by a car. Even kidnapping, I dont really care anymore. Ive already been raped… Rape and murder would be better than this shit. I just dont want to get to the point where i have to do it myself. Why cant i just accidentally take the wrong step going up the stairs and, bam, thats all she wrote. Its crazy […]
I used to be a lively person. I remember it vividly when I was younger I was always happy when asked about where would I be when I’m older and those similar questions. It was the downfall of me when I failed the entrance exam into the most prestigious high school in my town. I always had a high expectation strolling right behind me and my parents. I expected myself to be able to do just about anything I could imagine of doing.
But reality hits me rock-hard. I wasn’t accepted into the school that my sister went to. My parents claimed that they’re okay with the […]
How many times did the sun shine, how many times did the wind howl over the desolate tundras, over the bleak immensity of the Siberian taigas, over the brown deserts where the Earth´s salt shines, over the high peaks capped with silver, over the shivering jungles, over the undulating forests of the tropics – day after day. Through infinite time, the scenery has changed in imperceptible features. Let us smile at the illusion of eternity that appears in these things, and while so many temporary aspects fade away, let us listen to the ancient hymn, the spectacular song of the wind, that has saluted so […]
Every decision that I have made each mistake and failure in my life is floating around inside my head. The fact that i’m emotionally disconnected because I’m terrified of feeling anymore more pain. I don’t want anyone not even my ex and deep down I think I still love him. I still talk to him I still see him and I’m sure that’s a big mistake on my part. But I can’t let go maybe it’s because I’m afraid, maybe I like remembering the good. Its unhealthy I know that, but I seriously think that there is something wrong with me mentally. Is it wrong […]
I’ve never imagined I could be as devastated as I am now. I don’t believe in god but as my life progresses it is hard to believe that this amount of bad luck is random.Â
I’m not going to talk about the years of abuse I endured in my childhood or the fact that my mom died when I was four. I won’t go on about my dad’s alcoholism, and after this sentence I won’t mention the blister acne that adorned my face from 12-21. I won’t dwell on the murder of my best friend in high school or my family’s lack of funds. No, those […]
Red against white, who will win?
Silver metal, my deadly sin, some days I don’t wanna win.
Feeling high, feeling numb, lost again in this-
Eternal bliss.
But the scars that cover my wrist are so damn hard to over come.
Hearing the words they say, seeing the looks they give
Telling myself I’m not good enough.
I’m worthless, that I’m not allowed to breath-
Don’t say I’m not, don’t tell me I’ll be fine.
I don’t wanna see the light, at least not for tonight.
I wanna be dreaming of a lost happiness
Of someone loving this crazy broken person
Of not being shattered
it feels weird being back on this website, but Im back to the place where i need it.
i guess a little update on my life then, although Im pretty sure nobody cares.
lately, like in the past month or so, Ive been more depressed than i ever have been in my whole entire life. even though Im living at my dads now, which is everything i wanted, it still didnt fix anything. i pushed away all my friends and family and i just sit in my room all day watching YouTube videos. I cant even think about the future anymore, even though everyone […]
I’m not “high risk”, I’m just tired.
Well, where to begin. I’m new to this whole thing. I figured, why not express how I to a bunch of people I don’t know? So, here goes it.
Im 16, no I’m not perfect, Â no I don’t have the worst lifestyle a human could have, but it could definitely be a hell of a lot better. I am now a sophomore in high school, and if anybody told you that high school was easy, they’re lying to you. Quit while you have the chance.
I have been bullied since the fourth grade. Crazy right? Who knew that girls could be so mean. I was always quiet, […]
Hi there, I stumbled across this site and I really think it’ll do me some good to post my “suicide story” here.
So, I’m 15 years old and have always struggled with depression. Currently, my life is falling apart. Please don’t tell me that “I’m only 15 and I don’t even know what it’s like to be depressed yet” because I really don’t want to hear it. I always have made an honest effort to just keep my head up and try to stay happy but it seems to get harder and harder each day. I’m not a smart kid, by any definition. My grades have […]
Once an addict, always an addict… right? So that’s how this works too I guess. I want to cut so badly. I’ll have to go to the store to get some blades and replenish my selection. Seeing my thoughts written down makes me feel like throwing up. Good thing I’m too high to care
I think overdosing will be the best method. A bunch of sleep pills and a shit ton of vodka, I have a high tolerance for lq I know I’ll throw most of it up but hey here’s to hopping.. Cheers
I have had more and less, yet I have always been a miserable person. My brain is not right. I am not capable of sustaining relationships with sabotage or to truly “connect”. There are a few things I would postpone my death for but once I got to experience them I would not consider it worth living for. I date someone who has no respect for me, I am an option to them and worth keeping around albeit at arms length. I am embarrassed I allow this and often times pursue it. If it weren’t for him though I would not have any social […]
If you’ve made it to today. Hooray! Suicide was yesterday! lol…
O_O
sorry I’m high. lol