I count all the broken hearts I will leave behind.
You are the only ones that are keeping me here, even though I long to say goodbye.
How could I ever express my gratitude to you for keeping me alive all this time.
How could I ever apologise.
I know I can’t but I am sorry.
I will love you forever and I will see in the next life.
All of my love, my heart and my mind.
Forever yours,
Xx
(This is merely a poem, not an actual suicide note and I am hoping never will be)
it seeps into your heart, your mind, your soul wrecking your body everywhere it goes.
i cant take the time to stop and think where am i going? Who is gonna help me?
you wake up in the middle of the night and your dreams scare you right out of your bed.
How do i get out of this?
You take a knife and you just cut because after you do it sends shivers of warm fuzzy tingles throughout your senses.
it leaves you shivering with ecstasy
You wish someone would help you but all they can say is are you okay?
How do they […]
1,2,3,4…
It goes on and on.
The scars of yesterday,
the blood stains on my shirt,
still shaking, in shock.
How can you push me to go this far?
Talking to myself,
the faint whispers in my head,
“You’re not worth another day.â€
Another day goes by.
The smiles and laughter can’t get any faker.
At home, I lock myself in my room.
Cry to myself.
Telling myself its over.
Trying to say my last goodbye’s,
losing my mind.
Its happening again.
Been here so many times before…
So many miserable times,
I’ve had enough of this feeling.
Its over for me.
Or at least that’s […]
I thought I was finally okay…
I had found the guy of my dreams…
He loves me scares and all…
He loves me for me…
He helps me up when I fall
And holds me close when cry
But i’ve slipped to far this time…
Farthest I’ve ever fallen….
I know I’m loved by at least one.
But each and everyday I feel
Self hate building stronger.
I’ve attempted to change myself…
Hateing the result each and every time…
I’ve tried to end it well over a hundred times….
But yet I’m still sitting here crying in pain…
The blood from my cuts seep down my wrist climbing over each scar…
He begs for me to not give up….
But this is […]
I swear I’m a danger to other people. Everyone that means something to me, that I truly love with all my heart, gets hurt because of me. I don’t intentionally hurt anyone. I’m not that kind of person. But something bad always seems to happen to people that try to help me. It occurred numerous times in the past. And it just keeps coming.
This past week has been terrible. I wanna keep going; I just don’t know how anymore. I don’t want to invite anyone else into my life. I can’t take it anymore. I’m beyond saving at this point there is no use in […]
So I found something of mines from about a year or two ago and I decided to put it up on here. Everyone puts up the troubles they’ve been through and I’d like to share what I’ve written back then and maybe when later on, if I make it through with life, I could look back to my posts. Anyways, this was made around 2010 or ’11. This was for my friend, who was also facing depression like me and we both promised we wouldn’t do anything horrible to each other. I felt like I failed her and that she wouldn’t ever forgive me, surprisingly […]
I never understood why people write letters before killing themselves. It always seemed sort of unnecessary and selfish to put the ones that stay under a letter apologizing why they did what they did because why did they do it in the first place? So I never understood why, until now. They write because it’s the last goodbye, it’s their last attempt to say they love who’s staying and they are sorry they couldn’t find a way out… They know it’s gonna hurt who’s reading it, they do, but they have to write it. It’s like when an old man decides to reveal his last […]
You read the stories of people suffering and slowly dying. You hear the words of being told a person is dead over and over again in your dreams. You see everyone you know around you dying suddenly without signs. You cry every night when you remember them living. You beg God to somehow bring them back to you and alive again. You feel the presence of your lost friends at your side all the time. You replay the scenes of their death over and over again. You spend hours memorizing facts about the people you lost. You reread your last message or recall your last […]
Â
To: Life Â
Â
i wept gently at the sound of her call
i always favored that wide eyed grin
the time they said is now at hand
time for her rest to finally begin
suffering no more, for her at least
letting go all the pain and heartache
i’ll stay with her til the very last moment
for her heart was the claim i did stake
let go i say…please just let her go
theres nothing i can do to change
over and over til i see every color
the memories drowning the pain
can i go on?…do i even dare try
when half of one is […]
Please log in to report posts