on dec 3rd of 2004 2 years after my grandmother past away and i was dealing with bullies, school, and family problems.My brother just told our parents that he was gay, now you can imagine what mom and dad were going through, well that night they had went out and i was home alone i found a box cutter and hid it in my room. well after mom and dad left i wrote the note made sure i told them i loved them, and i filled the sink with hot water and put both wrist in the water after grabbing the box cutter and placing […]
Endless hours of unbearable pain.
Unbearable pain that cannot be explained
Why do I have to feel this way?
Can’t this feeling of hopelessness just go away?
I am so tired, so fed up
Can’t I just die, get it over with?
I don’t want to try anymore
I can’t try anymore
I have nothing left inside of me.
I had enough
I had enough
Why do I have to feel like this?
I want to end my life
I just can’t take this anymore
Please just let me die
The world would be better of
Good thing-I feel like I’m starting all over.Time to do things right.
Bad things-Sure there a lot of beautiful girls but none of them are you.None of them have your eyes,none of them have you voice.I thought my first love had a beautiful voice but then I heard you and now sometimes before I go to sleep I hear the voicemails you left me just to hear you.I have yet to meet a girl that’s like you.You were everything I looked In a girl and more.I’m not young anymore.I want to settle down.I could honestly see myself settling down her.She used to always worry about her […]
I’m not here,
I’m not there.
You can’t find me anywhere.
I have left,
I have gone.
Cause everyday
made my life wrong.
What people do,
what people say.
†I hate uâ€,
†Go away.â€
I tried to keep calm,
and have no fear.
But it got too much,
so i disappeared.
I took a rope,
and made a bow.
Put it around my neck,
and just let go.
For a second there was pain,
but soon there was no more.
As the life in me left,
my body went limp and poor.
Nobody knows,
nobody cares.
I’m transparent,
as thin as air.
People’s […]
anyone left here from ireland?
I live a life that’s not really mine. My mother has been emotionally and physically abusing me since I was a young girl. My father left when I was only seven years old, and lives with his fancy girlfriend. He doesn’t care what happens in my life. I acheive high grades, I have friends, and I seem like a normal girl externally. Internally, I am forever suppressing an intense desire to put an end to my life. I only find comfort in dance, music, poetry, and for some strange reason, science. However, I dread every moment I spend at home with my mother. I live […]
I was at school and the counselor wanted to talk to me. So I started talking to her about being depressed and she asked me if I had a plan to kill myself. I said I’ve been thinking of killing myself and if I were to I would use sleeping pills.Then she started crying and said it was because she cared and called the school’s police officer guy and he came in and asked if I was suicidal and I said yes and then I
had to confirm it with another counselor then he searched my bag and then I went in the back of the deputies’ car (without handcuffs) he […]
I don’t exactly know why I’m posting this. I don’t believe that I will kill myself, at least not yet. Although the thoughts are there. Constantly. I have thought about how I want to go, why I want to go, and the impact it would have on those who love me. It will be painful for them, I understand that. They will however live their lives. Without me. I’ve become a burden, a failure of a man. A failed marriage, failed fatherhood, failed life. I have no dignity left. No hope for the future left. No hope for happiness. My story is rather simple, and […]
I’ve had depression for a number of years. My parents work all the time and I wouldn’t consider my family to be close anyway so i’ve always been independent. When I was 11, my dad left my mum because she was an alcoholic but came back after 3 months. My mum lied to me for years about how he had left for another women but no..it was because of her and I was only told this 4 months ago. I’m not really close to anyone. I literally don’t care about anything anymore. It makes me laugh how even my dad thinks I’m not depressed, he […]
So im 33 and have hoped my life would get better…the past week or so has proved me wrong and there is nothing left to be hopeful about.I have several health problems any of which could kill me at anytime.I have 3 girlswhoi lovemore than anything even tho only one talks to me anymore.Within a week or so after i postthis i plan on taking my life,i know its a selfish act but there really is no other choice.It feels good just to write this down thanks to anyone who reads.
Maybe it’s for the best
That we no longer talk
It’ll break us both
Into a million pieces
Well at least for me
But then maybe your life
Wouldn’t be so dramatic
Maybe if I left you
The annoying thorn in your
Side would be finally gone
Maybe it’s for the best
That I leave you in peace
I cant live with myself anymore after he left ,i just hate myself so much for not being good for him ,i hate myself for having an ugly personality and ugly face and ugly body and i hate myself for being stupid and not being good at anything! I just hate that im not one of his sexy smart pretty friends ,i hate that he left me ,i hate that i cant rewind ,i hate that i cant get over him and i hate how much i miss him!.
I still remember how boring and empty my life was before i met him , and how when we started getting together it was just for fun ,wasn’t planning to ever fall for him or think the way im thinking right now ,i fell so hard i was ready to do anything literally ANYTHING ,and then he slightly started to back off ,its like he did that in purpose he just had this need to kill someone mentally for no reason ,he just left me without saying anything after he started to act mean ,i know he’s not mean i just dont know why! He […]
Why are people so unfriendly to me? Do I give off some vibe that says don’t talk to me? My roommate gives me dirty looks. I will call her Sandra from here on out. I am not sure if this is just how her face normally looks or what but she never says hi or good morning to me, I want to say those things to her but the looks she gives me make me stay silent. I live on campus this semester, it has only been a few days but it has been very hard. I feel like I am constantly sick to […]
the frost of frozen thoughts do stay
where hidden creatures tend to lay
among the canyons of my brain
where ice has festered in my veins
this vacancy begins to curl
and thoughts begin to twist and swirl
where heat and fire once had burned
but nothing ever lasts I’ve learned
how could you be lost again?
I wonder just how long its been
I bet youre fleeing, running fast
and making sure its me you pass
my hearts a bowl of pain and glass
where emptiness has now amassed
carved hollow from the thought of you
but you never even had a clue
shes […]
You’re tearing me apart,
When I can’t stop thinking and lock myself in my mind.
You’re tearing me apart,
When You’re always on my head and You’re forcing me to stop thinking of myself.
You’re tearing me apart,
When you want me to stop living, and concentrate on your feelings.
You’re tearing me apart,
Cause while time passes, flowers are dying and so am I.
You’re tearing me apart,
When You’re giving me reasons to not fight and give up on myself.
You’re tearing me apart,
All I can feel is the pain that you left and is keeping me by your side.
Without being there with you, but in your […]
Curled tightly in its iron womb
Forthcoming almost certain doom
an infant bird respires last
wretched secrets mere and vast
“To die!” it shrills “I beg you please
Take my breath and let me cease”
A chilly, silent, cheerless air
secreted by this bird’s despair
Restrained by ageless ferric bars
adorned in grisly, gaping scars
from strife and discord with its cage
and self-inflicted fiendish rage
Withered and replete of wrath
its essence walks a lonely path
Phantoms, voices beckon so
and warn of hells it dares to go
what happened to this bird I know
a tale of endless pain and woe
left in its cage to rot […]
Just called a suicide hotline.. they guy i talked to .. he just kept saying uh well you need to look at it from a better point of view.
I lost my 2nd oldest brother cause my oldest brother raped me! and you exspect me to look on the bright side. I look at his facebook everyday, hoping to get to know him. I DONT EVEN KNOW MY OWN BROTHER. And i hate it.. i hate it so badly. I only found out last week he’s graduated highschool.. i never knew.. i didnt know..
I miss him so badly, we would stay up reading the hungry catapillar, […]
The truth I hold, took years to unfold, locked up and never told. Now I speak, for I am done being weak. A story I will tell, awakening the pits of my hell.
 Pinned against the wall, being six a little small. Tongue against my chest, you can imagine the rest. Touching, feeling, my eyes rolling to the ceiling. I push away, forced down, screaming, but i was never found.
 Day and night, always full of fright kissing, sucking, nonstop fucking. Crying, weeping and always pleading.
Was I that bad […]
.. Have i ever thought i’d get to this point no.. im only 14 why am i here. What did i do to deserve this. I guess this is the time i’d share my story right? Exsplain it all get it out, wipe my slate clean. But im sure none of you care to hear my story. So if you dont stop reading, its not gonna be a happy one.
I was 3 when my mom kidnapped me, she abused me every day tried to kill me once out of jealousy, cause after i was born no one gave her attention anymore. Great mom right? after […]