So my cousin who I consider More of a friend and my friend from high school get along really well and we all hang out but now they are both in relationships and the 4 of them get along so well they are talking about double dates and I just left bcoz I have no1 and even if I did I don’t know how to be in a relationship or what love feels like the only example I have growing up is not 1 that I consider love and It is I don’t want it but I have also just lost the only 2 friends […]
Tag:
left
Locked in prison with no escape,
keeping track of long lost days.
Where will my weary soul reside,
when there is nothing left inside.
Who will wait my painful soul,
whose actions make me a fool.
Can I ever live with myself,
or in darknesss dwell.
Can the light of truth free me,
or all alone will i ever be.
The fate of my life is long gone,
for I have done to much wrong.
and see people delete their posts and accounts,
people fade away or suddenly disappear,
arguments and long, carefully written comments left just to show someone they care.
Something’s been rising in my head again, and reading through this site makes it more alive. It makes suicide seem more possible. That seems dangerous to me now, but it’s also a relief to be somewhere where it’s not something you have to keep hidden. It’s a relief just to see it written about.
Is there anyone else here who’s been away for a while? I’ve been back from time to time but I’ve spent more time here in the past few […]
I had this friend who I started talking to online. Me and my far away girl met him from a chat site. His wife left him after 4 years. He admitted that during the entirety of the marriage, she never let him do anything sexual with her at all! No sex, no foreplay etc! I was completely shocked.
He is a 43 man with Cerebral Paulsy, she was 25. She left him for another person with CP. I felt so sorry for the dude. I even ordered him NASCAR video game with my own money.
For almost a year after she left him, he praised her and blamed […]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hc8kH3d6Bf8
why is it that I always am left with the benefit of the doubt? it’s annoying. I don’t have aspergers but I feel like I do sometimes and I cant control it. I feel like no one understands me at all. like im left to suffer. it depresses me. it disappoints me when I don’t hear the correct words I expect of the other person. at least a feedback. always happens when im in college. like no one likes me for some reason I don’t know why. I feel stupid and it makes me look like it. I guess i’ll be dying alone then […]
Yesterday wasn’t the best day, and neither was today. I might have lost 3 friends over my mistake that I made.
I was supposed to go to an amusement park with my friend today but I refused to go out of fear. I feared being left out again. She ignored me at dinner last night to talk to my sisters (or at least it felt that way). I just boiled over and got angry, ran upstairs and cried. I didn’t say anything to her when she came up to get me. Just put a smile on my face and continued on.
When today came around I told […]
I’ve been sick my whole life… Ever since I was two years old I was sick. I was diagnosed with type one diabetes at the age of two, and it’s been hard for me to cope with my entire life… I was bullied during elementary school not only by students but also by teachers… And then I went to high school where I thought things would get better. They were basically the same but on a larger scale. I fell in love with a boy, I really fell in love. He was my everything and we were together for nearly two years… He left and […]
i drove up to okc because my step mother and dad are getting married and brittany’s (step mom) dad offered to give her 2 grand for a dress. we found a dress after playing cat and mice with her dad for the money. we couldnt pay for the dress becase her father lied about giving her money he offered. brittany works hard for everything she has never asked her father for shit and always looked after him. we stoped at 7-eleven and her father pulled up drinking and driving gonna get a DUI. my step sister is making a scene about it almost fighting him. […]
I dont have any fight left in me. Im 30, I was married for 11 years. My divorce should be finalized next month.
He left me for someone else. He told our daughter shes her new stepmom. I never wanted kids yet I have three and a baby on the way.
My husband controlled my life. I wasnt allowed to work or go to college, for a long time I wasnt even allowed to drive.
Last year when he asked for a divorce I joined a dating website and met a man. I fell in love, I never loved my husband this way. This man turned out to […]
Life for me it just a reset. Nothing is What it seems happiness is a temporary lie so why indulge.?? Because you want it so bad.. But once you get a taste its taken away from you and your left more broken than before. You just find ways to cope with life until it kills you or you end the suffering and do it yourself
It all started when I was in elementary my mom couldn’t afford an apartment or a house. so we had to live out of her boyfriends van. After living in the car for like a couple of months we moved to a homeless shelter. It was hard going to school because I couldn’t be like the other kids. For me after school was just going back to the shelter and that was it. I didn’t really get to play much and if I did play I would play with my older brother. I have 2 older brother but my oldest brother got kidnapped by his […]
I have no one. I’m left with my pathetic self and I can’t even manage to commit suicide. It gets harder everyday, and today was the last day that I was gonna let it be. My chance was stolen though, because I’m weak and stupid.
Where do I go from here? How do I even start to write this? It will be long and painful but I hope to give some light to my life….to help you understand where I have been and the footsteps that have brought me here.
I’ve been abused all my life. At the age of 1 my mother pour Mr. Clean down both my ears and caused my eardrums to rupture, causing me to lose my hearing. When I was 8 I received an at the time experimental surgery to give me back what they hoped would be some hearing. It worked and for the first […]
I tried to help a friend – a dear dear friend
It backfired – he hates me
I have nothing nothing left
I am leaving tonight – probably in a few minutes
They may not find me – hopefully not
My kids deserved better
My friend deserved better
I am sorry God
I tried
I failed
And the world is no more worse off than when I entered
Now I leave no more breathing, no more tears
I’m done
Goodbye
Its been a while since I thought about suicide. I had a panic the other day tho. I went and got some help in july. Went to this psychiatrist and got some ativan for anxiety and he gave me welbutrin for depression. I told him I didn’t feel depressed anymore. Just normal sadness ocassionionly. Lots of anxiety but not the suicidal solution that used to be right there just last year. Idk. I don’t think I’m depressed. The welbutrin doesn’t do shit as far as I can tell and this is like 2 and a half weeks in. I think I have add. I can’t […]
Truth is, im a failure in life. I fuck up in school and I cant even complete something in the summer no matter how small I set my goals. Why can other people complete things and I cant? Why cant I truly be happy? I hate myself. My dad left me and I think my mom doesnt like me. Its just hard not having anyone there for you in life you know? I lost the ispiration to live and I just hate myself. Im going to be a senior and I still dont even know what im going to do when I grow up plus […]
Just thought I’d make a post for those of you suffering physical pain and discomfort.
Many people are ignorant to the “scientific fact” that the left hemisphere of our brain controls motor function to the skeletal muscles on the right side of our body and vice versa. If you were to accept that movement begins with the eyes (you look in the direction you are traveling or intend to travel) then we must also consider the optic nerve and the way in which nerve impulses are sent from the brain (visual corteX) to the eye muscles.
There are in fact 2 branches of optic nerve […]
I’m 23 years old and I have one year of college left. I am getting a double major in two major arts fields that probably won’t get me a job. I have absolutely no money and am completely dependent on my parents; living at home right now while I take classes. I can’t stand being dependent on them and constantly feeling like I “owe” them. They still try to control me in many ways. It didn’t bother me until this summer but now it’s really getting on me…I feel like I am suffocating. I am already depressed and the fact that I don’t even own […]
I really fucked things up with my friends and they won’t ever forgive me. I feel extremely bad with myself for what I did and feel I can no longer live with myself knowing I did the things I did. I don’t have a good relationship with my family and there’s no one left in my life so I contemplate suicide because no one would be affected by it anyways since not even my family cares.
Since my father has heart problems and my grandma had trouble sleeping I’ll take all their pills and swallow them all at once so I can finally put an end […]
Latin translation:
(Ancient)
“sui” (of oneself) “caedere” (kill).
(modern)
“suicidium” or “conscivit” .
Greek:
“Aftoktonia”.
My thoughts upon these words, well the obvious “thing” which comes to mind is the cide or SIDE in sui, an anagram of die or dies. This combined with the “Aft” in the greek translation, presumably adapted as a nautical term which denotes either movement towards the STERN or TAIL of a sHIP or AIRcrAFT.
We might say the human body has six sides in three dimensions, that is the top, bottom left and right front and back, with the additional of the inside and outside that makes eight.
Amongst translations for the top as relating to […]