Im living this life that isnt even mine. I dont know what im living for anymore..I was once a happy little girl but everything chance for me im not the same person anymore….how do I get my life back?
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living
Hi, I just want to rant here. I am 22 and already tired of life. I have been without friends for a long time. Last time I have some friends in doing things is in my junior high school. I have been told to do everything by myself because that is what adults do: doing everything independently. I have a good role model for that: my mother. She is very reliable and can do everything by herself. I too want to be like her. I have been trying to live on without a friend since junior high. It’s scary and tiring to do everything alone. […]
this depression i cant get over. im almost 23 years old n life isnt life anymore. 10 years of this bullshit. numerous attempted suicides. july 5, 2012 i thought was it for me. i had taken 60+ pills. i just didnt care anymore. at one point i had it all. a job, school, living in my own apartment. today im jobless, living at home with my parents who could care less about my problems, and a single parent. that day i woke up and had completely given up on life. i remember the paramedics trying to talk to me. i was to drugged up for […]
Damnit. Why do I do this to myself? Why do I let myself hope and think that it’s going to be ok? How do other people handle it? How do they just move on from people, how do they keep breathing and living and laughing? I need serious help, because it’s clear that I’m not getting better. And I don’t know what to do. I’m scared.
I live a life that’s not really mine. My mother has been emotionally and physically abusing me since I was a young girl. My father left when I was only seven years old, and lives with his fancy girlfriend. He doesn’t care what happens in my life. I acheive high grades, I have friends, and I seem like a normal girl externally. Internally, I am forever suppressing an intense desire to put an end to my life. I only find comfort in dance, music, poetry, and for some strange reason, science. However, I dread every moment I spend at home with my mother. I live […]
The only thing that keeps me living is knowing that at any moment I can choose plan B. I would go  crazy otherwise. I’ll eventually do it anyway. You can’t fire me. I can quit. Why stay at a job you hate. I think its funny when people say don’t kill yourself. You will go to hell. Don’t you want to go to heaven? Lmfao. I know there is a hell and you don’t have to die to visit it either. It’s not that I want to die. Just wish I didnt have to be around another minute to suffer through it more. I don’t […]
Who honestly gets into a fight over a bag of fucking chips? Me and my family do. I have been living back with my family because I have a medical condition and can no longer work. No work equals no money to pay for my old apartment. After finally earning some money for myself from working the odd nights at my friends hall, all I wanted to do was enjoy a bag of chips that i finally bought with my own money. I bought other foods for everyone else and all I wanted was to have this to myself. Stupid isn’t it?
I go to grab […]
Kawaii: “Every species pollutes, but only one species tries to stop it. Every species gets sick, but only one can figure out why and stop it. We can’t run very fast, yet we are the fastest living things on the planet. We’re not very strong, yet we can move mountains. We have no wings, yet we’ve flown higher than any animal can imagine. Our voices aren’t very loud, yet we can talk to our brothers on the other side of the planet, even further than that. I have seen more than the keenest of hawks, gone faster than the quickest of all cheetahs, moved more […]
I’m at the point where I feel like I’m only living so the people I’ve grown so attached to don’t have to deal with my death. Knowing I’d be missed does feel nice because not all people can feel that. But living for everyone but me is taking it’s toll. I’ve been thinking about suicide everyday for a couple months, each day its becomes more desirable. Even though I know I’ll be missed, I still feel alone. I don’t see my future going anywhere. And I’m okay with dying. But pain is what brought me to this point and my death would cause a lot […]
I have struggled with addiction,depression,low self esteem,family issues,loss,grief etc for the better part of my life.I have attempted to take my life a few times,most times not truly wanting to die,was more of a cry for help.A year or so ago my best friend commited suicide,it was a very hard thing to deal with,it hurt very much.I always think of the way that he did it,i think that is how i want to go as well.Last year on x mas eve,i received some news that was rather bothersome to me,it hurt me deeply.I turned to alcohol,for the most part ive been clean for 10 years,the […]
Do you get that?
Because you think everything is “boring and a waste of time.” Â You can’t actually believe it… it must be an excuse to justify you doing nothing to change your life and start living on your own terms.
They know nothing of how hard exactly you’ve worked to change it and they assume that it is indeed possible to change. Â Knowing nothing about you, this is the pure assumption they cling to to discredit how you really feel. Â That it must be impossible for someone to take no pleasure in doing anything and find that the mere act of existing is the waste of […]
i dont even know where to start… the title sums up everything.
” Except some 10% of humans, remaining all are just meat bags
I really don’t know from where these 90% humans getting motivation for living
These 10% of humans at least leaving some footprint on earth. they may be remembered for next 100 or 200 years
But remaining 90% humans, No one knows what they really trying to do with life. simply assisting that 10% of humans.
Out of this 90%, some realized the fact and in dilemma whether to commit suicide or not. Average humans who are non suicidal are  just foolish ”
Question is: Â If an average person* with strong self convincing power is living happily, isn’t he […]
I am 16 right now. I would not be 16 if it hadn’t been for a mircale.
I was that kid who always seemed to be followed around by bullies. I had constant thoughts about what the world would be like if I were not in it and once even asked my friends if they would miss me if I were gone. Of course they said they would, but then, I didn’t believe them.
One day, I was walking home from school and I saw a big semi-truck coming my direction. The light had just turned green for him.
I thought about how painless and […]
“keep listening to music because it gets you through everything”
by imlostatsea
written by imlostatsea
life saving bands:
Never Shout Never
Pierce the Veil
Sleeping with Sirens
Suicide Silence
Of Mice & Men
My Chemical Romance
Enter Shikari
Bring Me The Horizon
Black Veil Brides
All Time Low
Falling in Reverse
Fall Out Boy
My Genuine Find
Catching Your Clouds
Motionless In White
The Devil Wears Prada
Blessthefall
We Came As Romans
Attack Attack!
A Day To Remember
Asking Alexandria
Before I go I wanted to say this. So you’ll understand why I chose to go. I lived in a middle class style of life. Learning responsibilities young and trying to fit in whenever it was time to move again. I’m 22 and can easily remember about 25 places I’ve lived. Not counting the dozen others I can’t. So I’ve kinda already lived a travelers life. Knowing when to pick up and move. Knowing where to go the next day. I was born into it. Naturally I can’t be held down. Forced to please another living a domesticated lifestyle. The walls tell me it’s true. […]
“How can they know how it feels,” I ask my self as I’m crying, “To wake up the next morning and realize that you’ve just failed at dying? To drone on day after day searching for a reason, just one reason to stay?” They said they really cared for me and i was dumb enough to believe them. I trusted them, i lived for them, and now i never see ’em. They ran away, scared today to think of what ive become. A monster, a coward, a harbringer of a life thats become undone. And so I’ll end my solemn poem with these words i […]
I just don’t see what the point of going on and living is anymore. If I’ll never have lasting happiness, whats the point? I have no friends, my last friend just gave up on me I guess. So, nobody would miss me anyways. And the feeling, the feeling that I know in my heart that the one thing I desire most in this world will never happen to me. It is one of the worst feelings ever. I think about death on a daily basis. How I will kill myself, when and everything else. And what it will feel like to be dead. I imagine […]