Boot777 asked me what my main problems are that cause my suicidal thoughts. I decided to make a post of it, so here it is. Well, there isn’t really one problem you can point at that causes the suicidal thoughts. Actually, there are a lot of things that cause them. I am not telling you all of them, because probably I’ll forget one or two and that’s going to be bored, so I’m going to tell the important one’s (I guess). I’ve been bullied from my fourth untill now. The worst part was at age of 11, 12 I guess. I was at elemntary school […]
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Lost People
When I was a kid I used to climb rocks and mountains, this one time I slipped and was hanging on the edge of a rock, the fall would have certainly resulted in my demise. I was scared, but then I looked down and for some reason I felt more alive there hanging so close to death. I felt so much life in me on that cliff.
10 years latter, I have finished my education, a bachelors degree and latter a masters degree in computer science and with good grades. I have a pretty decent job. I have pretty much accomplished what ever I was […]
Okay I said I wasn’t going to come back to this site but here I am. You ppl seem to be the only ones to understand. I’m in my early 30s and very alone. It sucks so bad but at the same time I push people away. I have these anxiety attacks and deal with depression so it embarresses me to be around anyone but at the same time I can’t handle being alone. I kno makes no sence at all. Its just like now… I lost 3 people just yesterday. Crazy weekend… had the police tracing my fone b.c. I was open to a […]
so ive been on here because of a girl, her name was kaylee and she pretty much treated me like shit for me doing nothing at all. but i’ve gotten over her and im so glad that i did because i don’t deserve any of that crap i found a way better girl that i know is not going to treat me like that. so i hope that girl out there actually realizes how bad she hurt me. like it just hits her one day or she gets hurt with the guy she’s with, just to see how it feels… her lying to me that […]
Where do i even begin? I am 18 years old and i lost the people who pretty much raised me at a young age and developed depression before i had hit the third grade. Then i found out i had cancer, ive been fighting that for almost a year now and ive gone through so many surgeries and dont know what to say about it. But the weight of the sickness and the looming thought of dying and just having peace finally is so enticing i long for it. But then seven months ago i met the most amazing person i k.ow the person thats […]
I’ve been “struggling” with depression since I was nine; I’m thirty-three now. I have been on hundreds of medications and finished sixteen rounds of ECT (8 unilateral, 8 bilateral) in May. Long story short, things are not better.
I feel a huge amount of guilt and fear about leaving my husband behind, but I can no longer distract myself from the fact that I want it to end and it doesn’t seem that is going to happen. I have been severely depressed, unable to go to school, unable to even bathe, for three and a half years now. I love my husband more than I knew […]
i have it good compared to others but i go and try to screw it up the first chance i get
by emily25
written by emily25
I am such an idiot! I see that something is finally going right, then I screw it up! I hate myself. This isn’t me. It’s not who I am. It’s wrong. I know it is wrong. I feel so guilty! Why did I do this? I know what the outcome will be. I have this small doubt still. Somehow It will work out. What if it dosn’t?! What if I lose the few people I have just because I had to say a few things like that?! I know how wrong it is. How wrong I am to do so. What the hell is wrong with […]