So I haven’t eaten all day and my brother came over to the unit to stay it’s Tuesday bullies me as per usual then cooks dinner for people as I told him I can’t be fucked cooking because he never does… Then he hands me 2 plates of spaghetti obviously assuming that my mother was here because she was here she was at my unit bullying me because shit wasn’t going her way as per usual. So I’ll upload a pic of it… Also I’m not eating I don’t trust him he’s probably poisoned it to be honest and he’s that much of an asshole […]
Tag:
poisoned
So for the longest time, I have had this paranoia that I was being poisoned by my folks.. every time I would eat something they made I would immediately start feeling sick, my throat started burning, my chest and stomach started hurting and I got really bad headaches later on. I’ve been trying to avoid there food for a while but I had to yesterday morning, they were watching. The same thing happened. I couldn’t take it anymore, immediately I started searching around for shit I can be poisoned with. I then found this on the bottom of one of my families bag. is this […]
Do you ever wonder what it feels like to have the cold end of a pistol pushed against the side of your head? Do you ever wonder what it feels like to suffocate inside of a car? Do you ever wonder about the endless feeling one feels while falling toward the end? Do you ever wonder how bright headlights are as they come barreling toward you in the dark? Do you wonder how a rope feels squeezing your neck? Do you ever wonder how horrible it feels to be poisoned beyond intoxication?
Do you ever wonder how that last breath feels? Do you wonder how stiff […]
I am no longer myself. I remember how I used to be before seven years of depression. I used to be the most optimistic individual, but life has a way of fucking you over.
For starters, after years of hearing people say negative things about you, you start to believe. I am an eighteen year old mistake. My life was a replacement. My father was abusive and caused my mother to have a miscarriage. Their intention was to replace that baby boy, so I was born.
Throughout my years, I have heard this story so much. Eventually as my father extruded himself from our family domicile, I […]
The boy sat alone in a dark room.
The world around him simply moved on.
The boy saw it happen, but he did not care to stop it
He had become a separate entity.
Something in the outside.
Outside
The outside was dismal, dark, crushing
He only returned there for the sick pleasure the pain gave him
He knew it was dangerous
He knew the risks
From the outside he watched home, and the world continuing without him
He saw it all and was almost content.
Almost.
He saw it, hell, he looked down upon the world he once knew
But the part of him that belonged there.
It longed to be home.
The boy realized his mistake.
He […]
The boy sat alone in a dark room.
The world around him simply moved on.
The boy saw it happen, but he did not care to stop it
He had become a separate entity.
Something in the outside.
Outside
The outside was dismal, dark, crushing
He only returned there for the sick pleasure the pain gave him
He knew it was dangerous
He knew the risks
From the outside he watched home, and the world continuing without him
He saw it all and was almost content.
Almost.
He saw it, hell, he looked down upon the world he once knew
But the part of him that belonged there.
It longed to be home.
The boy realized his mistake.
He […]
after spending five minutes in my garage, with the car running do you think I’ve poisoned myself enough or should I sit here till I pass out
I’ve decided to give peace to my weary soul and shed the shell of human self. I have spent so much time going in and out of the reality of human existence, to realms far beyond the soul. Death and Rebirth without intention. My soul is eternal but this flesh is weak and poisoned. Is there salvation for aching bones and tethered flesh? A mind decayed by substance, a soul that cries for renewal. “Feed me to the bliss of abyss” pleads my soul. When i open my eyes and I realize I am myself again and I look at my skin and I […]
I just, today I took a sip of something poisoned but I’ll hold on tight. I’m coming down hard and my joints are all stuck.
Where do you go when you have so many problems that you dont fit in anywhere? No meaning to my life. No love. No one. Mercury poisoned and severely damaged. Multiple Chemical Sensitivity drives me to the wilds. Isolation even in crowds. Disabling anxiety, the slightest sound makes me jump inside. Completely disillusioned with society. Unwilling to support slavery and destruction of the earth and her creatures for my own survival… Not much left as i see it…. Not necessarily trying to die, but dont really see a way to live in this toxic wasteland. Soon to be homeless. […]
Like cigarette smoke
My world is in a blur.
Gray and dried
Like a cancer that consumed my mind
poisoned and pissed
Anger is my love
Words so venomous
I bet it hurts
¡Danger! There’s no way out
You celebrate all the time that I waste
My bones are breaking under the weight of your success
We can be alone, together
Just know that every smile is a lie
Every Words been a line
Shedblack nights
Without a dawn
Alone behind my own made walls
Save me,Lie too me,Help me home
No more ropes
I’ve run out of power ups
No recharge
If it’s not for the barrel of a […]
For the uninitiated, narcissism is a personality disorder that has (almost) nothing to do with vanity, as we commonly understand it. In a nutshell, “their behavior tends to be erratic, manipulative and centered around themselves. In some cases, a person suffering from this condition can become both physically and emotionally abusive…”
“Typically, those with this condition are unable to relate to the emotions of other people, and see any form of criticism as a personal attack. They may react with extreme rage or violence in these situations, or turn the words of their perceived attacker around to make themselves look like victims.”
A little background: my mother […]
I’m not really feeling like smiling right now, honestly. Â But I’ve heard that writing positive poetry makes you feel positive. Â So I’ll give it a whirl.
Here’s my smile to brighten your day
And light the dark routes along the way
Through the winding road that’s life
Filled with anger, resentment, and strife
Hard is the brick beneath our feet
Harsh are the people upon this street
Who smile with poisoned lips and grin
A friend outside, a foe within
But not all who walk this winding way
Wish to harm or lead astray
By your side I walk as well
A fellow traveler through this hell
Lifting my smile as a tiny light
She woke up today feeling happy till she heard the screeching of her mothers voice. She had overslept. The kids were not ready for school and she did not have breakfast ready. She was so tired from the night before from having to meet two men.
She slowly got out of bed afraid of what her mother would do when she saw her. She raced quickly getting the small children up and on the bus. As they left she slipped the money onto the piano for her mother, knowing she was expecting it. She found it not quite fair that she had to sneak out of the house […]