So school starts tomorrow. I’m so not happy about it. I’m losing my best friend to someone who’s just like her, and apparently is so much better than me. Clearly, everyone’s better than me. Last night, I was alone. I could barely breath, I just felt like a huge weight was on my chest. I cut my leg with a razor blade that I’m going to take to school just in case. The past couple days I’ve been numb. I can’t feel a thing. I’m so depressed recently. I’ve stopped eating as much as I used to, and I rarely laugh. I was […]
I sit alone in my dark corner, my insides are dead and my eyes are cold.
My eyes are flat as my sight turn to my companion, so shiny, so sharp, only one of many weapons I use to slice my wrists into shreds.
My companion’s name: ‘razor blade’
I wrap my wrists in the sleeves of my jacket.
Voices around me scream my name as I lift the barrel to my head, I place my finger on the trigger and close my eyes.
I drown out the screams to stop,My heart stops beating and I fall to the ground.
The gun falls to the ground away from me barrel still […]
So yeah yesterday the 21th was my brothers birthday. He turned 6 this year. He was really happy, we had pizza, hotdogs, and a soccer cake. It was going really well… until dad came home from work. Like always he was drunk. So when it was time to eat the cake my dad started crying. Do you know how hard that was for ME, seeing my only father cry. I started crying as well… I was scared! My grandpa told him to calm down and eat. But then my dad got up went to the kitchen and grabes a knife. He then […]
I typed out a million different ways to start off the breaking in of my first post here, the only thing I could think of was “hey so I tried to kill myself this one time” that’s what it came down to.
Kind of sad to think I made all the effort to sign up to this and yet that’s all I can think to say. So let me tell you my story.
It may not be as eccentric or shocking a most people’s here but I’m not looking for a condition. I’m just going to give the honest truth.
I work hard for everything I’m not […]
Bummed out and angry – no reason for it. I feel like I’m going to cry, shatter, fall apart.
Oh well. Here goes my razor blade, slicing into my arm again.
(I hate how this is what I have to resort to)
im staying at my friends house ., she isn’t here and i feel like im going to kill myself i just carn’t stop crying and thinking about sliting my wrists and up my arms to i bleed out im shaking i just carn’t live anymore all guys want to do is use me and make me feel like a prostitue idk what to do anymore iv tried everything nothing works !!! i have a razor blade in my hand i can feel it touch my skin
I may be metal and have no heart
But in your life I have become a part
As I carve and carve at your tender wrist
I feel in your brain there must be a twist
Is it normal to turn to me for help?
When if I scar another they scream and yelp
Your feeling empty and rather alone
But I’m not left sitting alone in your home
In your bathroom cabinet I’m normally sealed
Although next to your heart your dreams become real
You use me to express your raw self hate
But should I be used in this way to create
The […]
I keep reaching out to those closest to me. One person in particular who says she cares. But evreytime i reach out she says the same couple things like im sorry i know and suicide is stupid. It just seems like she doesnt care as much as she says. And then noone else will take me seriously. Why wont they believe me why do you think i always wear long sleeves and when im not i always hold my arms close to my body. Do they not realize im dying inside. Ive told them i am. But they just look at me like im crazy. […]
I’m a FUCKING psychopath and I know it! I’m the sickest person you’re ever going to meet. I can’t remember the last time I felt the SLIGHTEST BIT of empathy. You don’t believe me? I don’t need you to. I’m a sick ***** who gets enjoyment out of other peoples pain. And my own pain as well. I’m a sadist who enjoys looking up serial killers and their ‘modus operandi’, the more horrible, the better. I manipulate people for my own enjoyment, still not convinced? I watched a real video of a real suicide (that was back when I wanted to kill myself, it was […]
i cut. not too much. i wasnt gonna do as much as i did. but its not too much i dont think. it doesnt seem so bad to me really. well ill just post a few pctures of it. so yeah thats it. i find them to be beautiful. please dont judge me.
i just have to. i cant not do it any longer. im going to cut. once again. the last time i cut was in early october. that was a really long time ago. at least it seems to me like it has been forever. every night i think about it. and i am CRAVING to do it. last night before i was going to sleep i was going to do it. but it was too close to the time my brother and mom wake up and i cant risk getting caught. my mom already wants me to do some psychiatric thing. i dont want to […]
Well, it’s about that time…again! I am awaiting the police to serve my warrant and take me to jail for defrauding my bank (1800.00)…but I had too, I had to pay the rent, bills and put food on the table for my family! I tried to explain to them, but money matters more in this world than life or so it seems! I already have a criminal background in fraud from years ago, always trying to support my family seems to get me in trouble. Yes, I have a job but it does not pay all the bills and we get further in debt everyday. […]
Ever since my mom died when i was 14 i’ve been depressed. I was a momma’s girl, i slept in the bed with her till i was 12. Alot of things happened to me as a child. My father left when i was 3 and I was molested by a friend of the family when i was 8. I remember being really shy as a child and scared of everyone and everything. I was constantly teased by my older sisters for being so cringy and i’d cry. Then one friday morning, after fighting a long battle of breast cancer, my mother died in her bedroom. When she died noone even acknowledged my presence. […]
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