This is going to be long, I apologize in advance. I guess I can start by saying I am a 16 year old girl, although I hardly resemble a girl, and very depressed. I have been depressed for almost 2 years. I self harm, but cutting usually, I’ll pull my hair in the extremely emotionally painful moments, or I’ll pinch my arms. Its been a year since I have posted here, but I’m in need of some type of empathy. My family on a scale from 1-10, is a good strong 7.5, we have our fights, but i generally thing we all do love one and […]
Tag:
Scars
my friend took his own life on march 18, 2013. he gambled with his own life as he spun the cylinder to his prized .45 revolver, looked dead into his best friend’s eyes and pulled the trigger… he had a 1 in 6 chance of death and he took that- he left no warnings before hand… i dont think he thought it would go off… Â but it did… and now he’s gone…….. he thought he had no one but his best friend- and even then, he knew he was gonna move in with his girlfriend and Robert would be homeless and living in his […]
Isn’t it ironic? A young adult takes his life and his entire community is shocked, startled…sorry. The social media sites will be flooded with posts, somewhere along the lines of “RIP *insert name here* – you were loved and will be missed dearly”. Why does no one bother telling him that before it was too late? Why do people only start to care when the last breath struck his body? Some will answer: because they didn’t know. So what? Does a person need to be openly suicidal, in order to receive some love and affection? When did it become a heroic deed to remind the […]
Hi, my name is Shannon and I am “to far out to find my way back” as I like to say. I have excepted the fact that I may never get better but I never expected to get this bad. Depression is like a roller coaster with up and downs that change so fast that outside life becomes a blur. In short I’m so lost in my own world that I may never find my way out. This scares me more than anything else because my world is like a horror film, full of death and destruction. The one thing that scares me the most […]
i’m in so much pain mentally.
can i tell you a secret? my best friend of 17 years raped and burned me with cigarettes while he was drunk. (you’re the first person i told) i have been cutting myself off and on since i was 9 because my cousin molested me until i was 12 and when i finally told them they said i was lying and i got slapped with being bipolar 2. i have one friend she is a complete ***** she doesn’t even care “it’s all about her” anyway. i am an introverted kind of person. i just turned 25 and i’m scared that […]
I’m bad at being a person, I’m bad at being alive. I’m bad at being worth it, heck, I can’t even survive.
I’m good at being a fuck up, i’m good at being sad, i’m good at having no luck, i’m good at being bad.
there are voices, and they yell, all the choices, and stroies they tell. there are demons, In my soul, and they eat me, they eat me whole. there are tears, streaming down, filling an ocean, i hope I drown. There is blood, spilling out, I really pray that, I’m not found.
I’m bad at giving love, I’m bad at giving hope, i’m bad […]
Take another step dear,
take another breath dear,
bow to your fans dear,
and poof, you disappear dear.
Take another shot hun,
Drink until your numb, hun.
It’s all a buncha fun,
Bam, shouts the gun!
Buy a bikini, dear
and make it pretty, dear.
wear waterproof makeup dear,
cause you wanna look good, dear.
now jump in the water hun,
let it take away the pain, hun
and Done done done, hun,
you’re done.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I havn’t written a poem or song for a while. I guess because things have been okay since since last monday, I started going downhill again, I have a […]
This might seem like a pointless text, but I do need help with something… You see, there’s this girl, and she really fucking awesome, and I would like to try take it further than friendship, but I have doubt, we’re almost completely the opposite, I’m shy, quite and prefer to be by myself and I have attachment issues, while she is confident, loud, and loves to be around people XD but I don’t know if its really worth it… The last time I was close to somebody like this and they said they would be there, ended leaving, and left me with many scars, physical […]
I think the thing I realize most about getting closer to killing myself is the isolation. I struggle with feeling like no one cares – or notices – when I talk about it. So, as I get closer I stop talking. No one seems to care – or notice – that either.
The reality of suicide is that you’re alone in it. You will go alone and you have to be able accept that. Whether others care or notice doesn’t matter. No one can or will save you. Until you accept that, you’ll stay. When you accept that, you won’t try, you’ll do. It’s simple, I […]
If I were to be honest for a change and told you what was inside me. All the demons I fight every day. How much regret I have for everything I have done. If I told you that I want to kill myself. Would you understand? Probably not. Everyone looks at me like I’m insane. All the scars on my arms and legs it reminds me that my past is real. Every day I look in the mirror and hate what I see not just the outside the inside too I feel so ugly. I’m full of anger and sadness. I’m deprived from happiness. I […]
I’m tired. My body detests me. I’ve put it through hell. The scars can attest to that. I can’t fall asleep without a drink in me. I close my eyes at two in the morning and wake up to non existing screaming a couple hours later. The men in my life have all disappointed me. I’ve been bought off with money and sex. And yet, whose to say that it’s not my fault as well? I can’t find worth in myself. I don’t know if I’m pretty or pretty stupid. I don’t know. At the time I sure as hell didn’t care. I just want to have that […]
How my life has changed these past months. I have officially stopped cutting for awhile now. I feel weird sometimes because i know that people can see all my scars and they immediately judge me, but dont say anything and i feel like maybe i shouldnt make other people uncomfortable like that..
Ive had my ex, the one from before, ask me back out and i couldnt do it, i had a really good friend ask me out too and it was awkward because i couldnt bring myself to tell him no to his face, i never answered him, I feel really guilty now. Im currently […]
I am currently 16 and i have strughled with depression, suicidal thought since i8th grade. from the time i was 6 yrs old i was treaded like crap by my strp dad and me being the oldest dint help any. i was starting to strugle when i turned 11 i moved i always hped things would get better but i started getting bullied at school. after 6th grade i moved again and got transfered to a new school things were better for a while but then everyone started making fun of me, i ignored them for awhile but then i couldnt do it anymore and […]
Last night I was gonna kill myself. I had everything set up. Â I was actually starting to feel better knowing that I would not have to deal with the day to day suffering. I was not going to say good bye. I was just going to go away. Then I heard my dad telling me good night he told me he loved me. I just started crying I’ve been not letting myself do that. I realized that everyone feels pain. My mom shes depressed too. My brother has to deal with his past. My dad is full of regret. I can’t just go away. I […]
When will i feel accepted, or truly beautiful .. When will these scars leave my body forever. Why does this “god†hate me so much.
does anyone have any good tips or idea on how to cover up bad and noticeable scars? It’s getting too warm for jackets and I can’t use bracelets as they are too high up?
Secretly it hurts… it hurts so bad i feel like ill break down… should I be with someone I crush on or had been with and trust… depression or lies… who what… make it all stop, Jason make it all stop i need you… Take me away and with that my memory, oh please it hurts im the marionette of a whore… secretly it hurts and id rather scream than smile.. mommy saw my scars.. bubby is so sad because Im not sure if i want him… the sub yelled at me all day.. give up because you cant be a string player… no no […]
stop all of the dreams,
and start all the nightmares,
Listen, to them scream.
but nothing is there,
your all I’ve got,
your my only hope.
but now even you
seem to be cutting the rope.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
it’s a fucking mess
and there’s no escape.
my wrists are red.
someone save me.
drowning in this sea,
this sea of blood.
death stole innocence,
with the bang of a gun!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
with every breath you take,
you want to stop it all.
the blade is your friend,
it helps you when you fall.
love is a joke,
your only love is rope,
it made you a […]
This is it.
Day in, day out. Staring at the four walls of the room. Depression, Anorexia, they say i have.
Suicidal thoughts.
I’m sat in a mental health hospital, Tier 4, 7-day resident. I never leave.
I’ve been here for months, and now, months later, life is still the same.
I look at something and think, can i die using that?
I self harm, i cut, i burn, i don’t stop, razors, straighteners, on my skin, i don’t feel the pain.
I have scars, all over my body, each one telling a story, each […]
Hello everyone ! I’m doing this project i call ‘Tell me your story’. I did a facebook page & a blogspot. But I need YOUR help to make this work.I want to provide a way for everyone to interact with each other. This is how it works. You tell me your story, I tell everyone else. You could be known or stay on anon. It’s all up to you. What matters is that your story will be heard. People will know that you exist. You will leave a trace that you once existed. You will help other not do the same mistakes you did or […]