I’ve been having a lot of problems at home and nothing seems to be going right for me. Today, my nan.. the person i love most in this world, the one who’s ever stopped me from doing anything (killing myself) told me to go kill myself. It honestly broke my heart so much and i’ve selfharmed, ive seriously got no reason to keep going. It is so hard to carry on when you have no one on your side, no one understands me. I dont know what to do anymore, everything i do always turns into a bad decision which i end up […]
I wanted to come here for a repost, as if once was not enough.
I’m a middle aged woman (55) whose life was wrecked by a cancer diagnosis followed by a divorce. Combo hit hard. Back then, I was tearful and melodramatic, and wrote a tearful and melodramatic post. Happily, that’s over. That is a distinct plus.
Another plus: I’ve lost my faith. I no longer believe in a life after death, and that’s a very freeing thing.
I have, I believe, been a good mother to my kids who are pretty happy, pretty well adjusted, and pretty clueless. This is a major plus 🙂
Meanwhile, I’m as suicidal […]
Been dating a girl for almost a year now and we couldn’t be happier , but I’m scared because every girl I’ve ever been with has cheated on me… I mean I’m accustomed to being cheated on :/ its beome a fact of relationships for me, but this one hasn’t cheated on me…. but I’m sure she will And the thought of her with someone ELSE is gut wrenching and painful 🙁 I’m just SO scared that the day is coming… it always seems to. I’m never good enough and its only a matter of time before she sees I’m not good enough and she […]
So i have been diagnosed with postpartum depression and put on zoloft….anybody have experience with this antidepressant? I’m just looking to see any side effects any one experienced and how long it took to kick in? Did it make the suicidal thoughts better or worse? Just any info/real experience is appreciated
Every 14.2 minutes someone in the united states dies by suicide Nearly 1, 000, 000 people make a suicide attempt every year 90% of people who die by suicide had a treatable mental disorder when they died This is our message to give hope back To those who are lost in despair
Staring blank at the wall Never been so alone Why can’t they get me? Would they care if I was gone? Spinning around all alone In my head tonight Would it all be so easy? Would they ever miss me?
You can’t let them win I won’t let you give in,
You are […]
December was when I had my last appointments with my therapist and psychiatrist, and that is when they said they’d send out new ones in the new year. A month later and I’m still waiting for the letter. So I decided to call up their offices, to find out whether they’d made one and I just hadn’t got the letter. Turns out they haven’t even fucking made one with me. What a nice way to find out even my psychiatrist and therapist have given up with me, a fucking phone call with their receptionist. I don’t even know if this means they’ve discharged me or […]
Hi Guys,
Umm…. So I think I have decided something… I’m not going to continue with these posts… Sorry… It’s just I am running out of things… My life is now boring… I mean all it is now is wake up, starve myself, go to sleep. I mean do you really want to hear that every day?
Sooo yeahh…. If you do want me to continue just leave a comment saying so…
How am I? Physically: Meh, could be better, but it could be worse. Mentally: My mind is chaotic.
My physical state… Well you know how I injured my shoulder maybe a week ago? Yeah well last night […]
This is my tribute to bullying. There are SO MANY kids out there getting bullied. And what are we doing to stop it? Nothing. Stand up for once. Be yourself. Stop being fakes. And start caring. WE can only change this world. It’s not going to magically happen. So live in the moment. Don’t bully. Be you. And stand out. You were born to be YOU. Not someone else. You weren’t born to be bullied or to be a bully, just you. So what if you were born ‘weird’, an ‘outcast’, or ‘nerdy’. It’s you. You can’t change who you were supposed to be. […]
Hi Guys,
So… Yeah I’m here… Yay? So yeah… Um yeah…
A lot has happened to me… I started talking to an adult about my problems so that’s good… Bad thing… It’s someone that’s not related… I mean I guess it’s not that bad but I don’t know….
How am I? Physically: Could be better Mentally: Could be tons better
My physical state… I don’t know…
My mental state…. Suicidal thoughts are taking over….
I’m sorry this is short… It’s been a rough day…
Here’s your poem:
i don’t know much
im afraid to speak my mind
im afraid to say
im afraid so much
i don’t know a lot
all i […]
Today I told my mom pretty much that I hated her. We got into this big arguement about nothing. Then we got into another one and it was about my best friend/sisster. She told me I was hanging out with her too much and asked me if we were gay. I said ” You know what I’m getting tired of being accused of being gay. But I’m not and neither is she. Maybe she’s not old enough to be my mother but at least she’d treat me like a mother is supposed to because obviously you don’t give a shit about me. And if you […]
So im 33 and have hoped my life would get better…the past week or so has proved me wrong and there is nothing left to be hopeful about.I have several health problems any of which could kill me at anytime.I have 3 girlswhoi lovemore than anything even tho only one talks to me anymore.Within a week or so after i postthis i plan on taking my life,i know its a selfish act but there really is no other choice.It feels good just to write this down thanks to anyone who reads.
I don’t know, I’m bored. I slept all day. I have nothing to do. So I guess I’ll tell you my story. I’ve been cutting for 4 years now, it started out as something small. Just one cut, then two cuts, and then before I knew it I was cutting all the way up my arm and on my legs and thighs and my stomach. It’s now an addiction. Wether I’m feeling shitty or not. I need to cut. I want to cut. But I’ve tried suicide multiple times, I’ve chickened out a couple times, I’ve failed a couple times. But I woke up one […]
I want to say hi
But do I dare?
I don’t want to be annoying
I don’t want to be clingy
I always start the conversations
Maybe you’re busy
I don’t want to annoy you
But I worry
So much
I guess maybe another time
I’ll say hi…
Hi Guys,
It’s day 12! Woo!
So today was a snow day for my school. Which is great! So my friend and I went to a humongous library!!! It was amazing! I love books and libraries and it’s just gah! So that was awesome. I was feeling great. I was feeling happy for once. Then my sister had to go and ruin it. She threatened me again. *sigh*
Let’s start from the beginning. I woke up late today. (woo!) At around 10:30ish. I got up. Read a little. I did have breakfast/brunch. 😀 It was pancakes. Then I started talking to one of my friends and […]
Hi Guys,
Welp its day 11. I just want to thank all of you who stuck with me. No this is not a goodbye note, but just a thank you. Your comments (well most of the comments) helped me and comforted me. 😀 So thank you especially to Michael, OnlyLOVEisReal, and The Koji, you guys have helped me so very much and I hope you continue to comment on my posts. 😀
Another note thing is that I do post poems, but sometimes they’re at random times, and I’m sorry for that, and so maybe you don’t see them. So I just wanted to put that out […]
So, I’m about to return to school in a few days, and I’m supposed to contact my counselor upon arrival to set up our first appointment of the semester. But I’m torn. You see, I’ve already gone way over the “limit” of visits supposed to be available to students, so I am beginning to feel like I have no right to continue going. Plus, it’s been almost a year of consistent visits, and at this point, I feel like I just talk in circles, but my level of depression remains consistent, even despite changes I make in my life. I am trying so hard, but […]
Hi Guys,
Yes I posted yesterday…. It was a bit earlier than normal… Sorry.
So today. Today was an sdjkjsskfjk day. Nothing really exciting happened… Well I guess I shouldn’t say that. A new semester began today at school. Which means a new schedule. Which means new seats. And new teachers. Well of course in one class guess who I get to sit by for a whole semester (about 90 days) MY BULLY. Wooo…. Not. So that’s that. On the bright side I moved to my honors English class :D.
So yeah. How am I doing? Emotionally: Unstable. Physically: In Pain.
I don’t know how long I […]
for as long as i can remember, i’ve always been different from everyone else.
eventually i came to accept it; i basked in loneliness, despite the fact that it was “wrong” in the eyes of others. it was wrong to sit in my room alone. it was wrong to ignore others. it was wrong to not be like everyone else.
so i put up walls and i lived behind a mask for years. it was nearly perfect, as everyone bought into my lies. they believed that i was the person who i pretended to be.
yet one person knew.. he was the person closest to myself. he […]
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