Fuck December. My grandma died 4 days before Christmas 2012, and my other grandma died 2 days before Christmas 2014. My great grandma died a few days ago, she was 98 though so. I hope no one dies on Christmas this year. Regardless, fuck this month and everything it brings. And to think, before 2012, this was my favourite time of year.
So a guy in my town killed himself recently. He spent his last days donating all of his stuff to goodwill. Cleaned his apartment top to bottom. Vaccumed, cleaned, sold his car. Layed out a tarp on the floor and wrapped himself in it. Left the key outside is apartment and called the cops. Then put a pillow over his head and shot himself. People couldn’t believe it but all I could think is what a great guy he was to think that much of others before he did it. Man I’m fucked up.
Always u hear on news bad things happen i always wonder why or how pple can just buy guns and or try to guns was made for protection i think they should do better job on keeping guns only to protection
who else has trouble reaching out to people about their issues?
sometimes i think i’m ready to reach out and get help. then i remember all the times i tried to do so and was burned – like when my sister called my cutting ‘stupid’, when i tried to approach the subject with a school counselor and was ignored, not counting all the times i was told to just be grateful for what i have, or to ‘just get over it’. or my favorite; ‘do something about it then’.
they tell us if we’re feeling bad to talk to someone about it… what if no one wants […]
So right now in my hometown, there’s this kid who disappeared on Monday. He’s 16 and he left two suicide notes and the whole community is looking for him and it’s all over Facebook. And for some reason everytime I see one of those posts that they’re still pushing everyone to look for him and people think they saw him on the side of the freeway, everytime I see one of those posts, I can’t help but think “just let him be.” If he doesn’t want to be here, don’t make him stay. Just let him be. And I know it’s just people caring for […]
(not about/directed at anyone here) what is it with people and getting told i’m feeling sorry for myself? we’re taught that self-pity is bad, but is it really? why must i always have to ‘suck it up’? why can’t i have a moment of weakness to feel bad for myself, and then suck it up? what’s wrong with letting oneself be human? everyone has thrown a pity party for themselves some time in their lives. we all have asked ourselves “why me?” – don’t act like you haven’t. so, why is it okay for everyone else to complain, but when i do it i’m just […]
i dont know if i can go on anymore i practically cry myself to sleep every night , i do nothing throught the day but watch tv or think about how i used 2 get high. idk what to do i see nothing changing anytime soon i just want the pain of living 2 go away its said when you have a better life dreaming then reality.
Ok, so I read a bunch of posts to day and it seems like many of you are angry and are enjoying calling people assholes (haha I love it). People seem to think that it’s not ok to get angry… that it’s not ok to express your frustration at a situation or at some dickhead who is ruining your day for no apparent reason other than his dickheadedness. So, lemme say this: if you have a justafiable reason to be angry, LET IT OUT. Don’t try and suffocate your true feelings with rainbows and carebears; grab your bat, swing at some trees, scream some fantabulous […]
I feel i dont deserve friends i dont have many but very few kno my wrongs and still speak to me the one i hurt most is done with me we dont even speak i think of __ alot i miss the good times i suck
Me and my boyfriend broke up a month ago. We were close to our 1 year, but he didn’t feel the same anymore. It was long distance so of course it wouldn’t last. I felt okay the first few weeks but now I feel like shit. My friends don’t seem to help, they try, but I don’t think they know that I think about suicide constantly. When I want to talk I feel pushed away. I feel alone and most of the time I want to be alone. I want nobody to talk to. I just want to die, I feel like everything is falling […]
We don’t know each other, but I know that at least most of you are familiar with the thought and the desire to end one’s life. I am posting these words here, to you, as I cannot share them with anyone.
I have tried so hard. I’ve been hospitalized four times and I’ve managed to avoid that in the last 6 years. I got a job and I hold on to it as if the routine and my financial independence could save me. A friend (one of the two that survived to long periods of time in which I feel unable to talk to someone) asked […]
how do I figure out, what my purpose is? i just need a sign. just to let me no why I was put here. cause at this point, I don’t even think there is a reason I was put here. just a mistake my parents made. how come over heard so many people say they’ve received signs, and they’re life has changed for the better now? Or that just wonke up one day, and they didn’t want to die anymore. well why can’t that happen to me? I know I have to be “patient”, but I feel like I’ve been patient a little too long, […]
I was adopted at birth, and for good reasons.
I never felt “true love” from my adopted parents even when they said so or acted like it, because in the back of their heads, I was there to fill an emotional hole before anything else.
I never had a friend who truly cared about the Universe. Maybe they weren’t smart enough or weren’t as curious as I am, but still it sucks when you can’t relate to anyone in your entourage, since virtually all the people you know of are actually “playing similar games”, and by doing so, miss the opportunity to look at things from other perspectives.
I […]
There isn’t a day that passes that I don’t think of ending my life. I continue to live for my family, although latley that reason doesn’t hold as much weight as it used to. I feel like all I am is a burden for them. I’ve tried my whole life to succeed and be a positive person in this world but it just seems I can’t catch a break. I’m on my 4th hip surgery and I do not see the light at the end of the tunnel anymore. I’m in such a dark place and have been here before. I’m tired of the fight. […]
My uncle killed himself last week. Drove out into the woods about 10 miles from his house and parked at the end of an old logging road. Tied his belt to his seat and hung himself. He had been missing for a few days before they found him. I wasn’t super close to him. I feel nothing. I want to hate myself for not feeling bad but it is hard to when I feel nothing. It’s hard to judge or hate when I have been considering the same thing for a while. How long did he think about it? What finally pushed him to do […]
It’s something that’s just in fairytales and movies, but sometimes I wonder if there is such a thing as being cursed? If there is something out there in the universe that causes some lives to be charmed, normal, whatever and some to be unfortunate.
I used to post here a long time ago. I had a plan to travel and if that went well I would give life a chance and if it didn’t then I was ready to kill myself. I had pills ordered and everything.
And things got better. Then bad again, then better, then bad again. But then things got perfect. I ripped up […]
It is sad to think that today you would have been 19.. I feel like people all around nd me die so young . Probably even for you all. Good souls are taken every day . Kids are being diagnosed with cancer at 2, people are being killed by terrorists, or even getting into a car accident . He died just a 2 months before […]
Do you ever just sit down, zone out, and think about how weird life is? I mean, we are all living off of our brain. Our brain controls what we do, how we behave. Our bones, muscles, skin.. Those are just the extras.
I’ve met someone. He isn’t the most loved guy in our grade. He told me he was scared. People are starting to hurt him PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY. He is so afraid of everyone. I’ve realized that so many people are so damn negative and I don’t understand anymore! It’s fucking 2015! How much longer do we have to struggle through this?
She perches on her cream-colored windowsill as a robin would upon a branch. Taking a look outside of herself, she sees all that is good around her. Look at the sky, what with its baby-blue face freckled with wisps of cloud cover. Hear the gentle crunch of dying leaves under the tender feet of newly birthed fawns, or the gentle shushing of feathered-wings taking flight. Smell the earth- the rich tone of moist soil mixed with the crispness of mountain air takes away her breath. Feel the cool breeze run his fingers over her skin, over her cheeks and lips and arms, as lovers would.
I always have dreams about a friend who killed him self when he was on lsd. He took it and walked onto the interstate and ran in front of a car and died later in the hospital . We all knew he committed suicide . He always told us he wouldn’t live to see 21 but none of us knew he was depressed . But in my dreams he’s always giving me life talks and cheering me up . I really feel like it has a meaning. I really think he’s visiting me in a way .