Tag:

tonight

Beer beer entry 3

by tauruswrangler 7/18/2014

written by tauruswrangler

Entry 3

Beer beer I’m drinking beer. I’m gonna get drunk and overcome my fear.

I couldn’t afford it but that’s okay I don’t need money where I’m going anyway. Only a gold coin to pay the man so he can ferry me far away from this land.

All the bad memories and actions past, I’ll make them end very fast. The daily stresses and endless fights will surely be over after tonight. I’m done and spent I’ll tell you that. I don’t have to worry this beer will make me fat.

Goodbye mum goodbye dad I’m so sorry that I was so bad. Goodbye lover who was only […]

7/18/2014 2 comments

Exit tonight

by too young 7/14/2014

written by too young

Hey again, second post and last post.

I feel that I’m ready although my methods sucessrate is questionable, I’m going to jump tonight but I can only access 10 meter fall to a stone fallpoint… so head first seems important. If you wonder Why I can’t do”better” about the height, here is my original post with background story, if you would wonder.

Please, help me

I’ve written all the letters and my requests for my funeral. But this will destroy my parents and it makes me panic… I want them to be able to continue their lives… can anyone give any tips for mental preperations without any […]

7/14/2014 9 comments

Ugh! Why bother.

by New Shoes 7/13/2014

written by New Shoes

Ever had someone laugh in your face for trusting them? I never trust myself or my own judgement because my head is so fucked. Someone convinced me to give them a chance and that I was being irrational which is normally the case. Well tonight they literally laughed because I trusted their intentions and settled for less. I feel so stupid and so used and I am just trying to survive when I would rather be dead. I have prayed for death for so long and tried to kill myself several times. Why do I set myself up for heartbreak. I am not important to […]

7/13/2014 18 comments

I like how

by Remnant The Unbroken 7/6/2014

written by Remnant The Unbroken

My dad only tells me he loves me when it’s convenient. He calls our house and is like “Who is this?” when I answer. I couldn’t tell if he was joking, but I say sarcastically, “One of your kids”. He then says that one of my sisters calls, and I tell him I’ll let her know that he called back. “Alright, bye.” Then hangs up.

Lol that’s the most I’ve talked to him in about 2 months. Yeah I know some people don’t get to talk to their dads at all. Sometimes I wish he was completely gone so I didn’t have to be tortured by his superficial asshole yet nonexistent […]

7/6/2014 4 comments

I don’t know if I’ll survive today

by darkshaman 7/5/2014

written by darkshaman

I planned to go tonight. I have the pills ready. I honestly don’t know if I will or not. I had a partner last summer, we got ready together. She drove to my place (where I live with my mother in the middle of nowhere) to pick me up and we cuddled all night and talked and watched her favorite show. But on the day it was to happen, I backed out. She didn’t and sure enough her obituary showed up on the internet and her friends posted messages about her. She was part of a community who really misses her. I only have a […]

7/5/2014 5 comments

Can’t get over it: /

by lookinggirl 7/4/2014

written by lookinggirl

I have been reading stories on this site for a long time, but I finally signed up to be able to write something myself tonight. Although I don’t consider myself suicidal, I must admit I have thought about it on more than 1 occasion. I have had a couple times that I really felt like dying, but first of all I would never have the guts. Second,v believe that anything we go through in life can be turned around, but you know what? That’s not why I’m here tonight. I’m here because I figured this is the perfect place to vent and give myself a […]

7/4/2014 3 comments

I hate the voices in my head.

by Everley Sappling 6/30/2014

written by Everley Sappling

I am alright and get through my day half decently, then I don’t know what…usually in the evenings I am stirred by a torrential wave of wanting to die and self harm.

Tonight it is connected to the men I wanted to love that didn’t love me. I want to drift into oblivion when I think about how I let them treat me or what I put up with/fell for. I am stupid; I am trash; I am no one.

6/30/2014 3 comments

A suicide note; The final act- decided and will be done soon.

by LovingLife 6/17/2014

written by LovingLife

I’m off with the world, things have gotten so much worse in a couple of days; my remedy – the last working medicine gives me no avail anymore. Chest pains and the difficulty to breathe is too much. Have to get to my car and end it in a matter of days.

Why does this unjustified destiny come across for someone who has no reasonable desire to kill himself otherwise than that of the irreversible condition – and a deadly one of course. This will be hard on my family, but I’ve ruined almost every relationship beforehand already – love and hate for all, I believe […]

6/17/2014 37 comments

Going tonight

by almp 6/16/2014

written by almp

I was doing great for about a year. Started seeking PTSD treatments but unfortunately not a lot can be done at this point. So I’m taking my life tonight.

I tried my hardest and had a good run. See you in hell.

Good luck to everyone else on here. Live like I couldn’t.

I’m out. 🙂

6/16/2014 3 comments

I dunno.

by lifenevermattered 6/11/2014

written by lifenevermattered

I just started this thing tonight. I needed a place away from everyone else. A place I could hopefully make someone understand but at the same time I hope no one does ya know? People shouldn’t have to understand what this feeling is. It nags at me constantly. Maybe I’m different from everyone else on here and maybe not. I dunno. Don’t care either. I wanted to kill myself when I was 30. That was a year ago but my roommate’s dad died a week before and with my horrible sense of obligation I tried to stay and help. But now? Now I’m feeling that […]

6/11/2014 2 comments

Can I just go?

by gulfcoast1113 6/10/2014

written by gulfcoast1113

I’m just tired o being the fuck up of my family. I’m 19 and I go to community college and work part time and am not allowed to move out. Meanwhile my 2 sisters both got in to Ivy League schools (one is attending Harvard grad school in the fall) and they haven’t worked a day in there lives and get a monthly allowance. I’m family ignores me and everyone moved away. I live with my grandparents and we have nothing in common my grandma is 80 an my grandad has dementia. Tonight was just the final straw we went out to dinner and he […]

6/10/2014 2 comments

by lalalonley 6/5/2014

written by lalalonley

those who are there helping,listening and offering advise,

you are heros. the greatest people alive tonight. bless you, your are brings of great passion Â EXTREMELY strong hearts

6/5/2014 2 comments

Ideation

by EroticNeurotic 5/27/2014

written by EroticNeurotic

Hey there baby, you looking fine
again tonight like always
I’m so bad with these corny lines
but you never judge me
instead you stand far away and let
your vertiginous glory pluck at my nerves
ready to catch me when I remove
80 feet of concrete between us

Remember when we first met?
I was so young then and you were the same
soft shade of aquamarine that I feel
flling my nostrils and bluring my sight
Your presence a promise of an eternal
unbearable comfort hugging me tight

How much has changed since then?
Nothing at all, as you of course know
except that your […]

5/27/2014 0 comment

Another Attempt

by JiminyCrispies 5/18/2014

written by JiminyCrispies

So I told my psychiatrist about my overdose a couple weeks ago; they now know of three of my suicide attempts. And each time they haven’t done squat to help me. Yet again I was told of Â the dangers it can cause my liver and all that, he asked my how likely it was that I’d try again. I said there’s a 50/50 chance I would. So I was basically telling her that I probably, almost more than certain would do it again. So what did she do? Tell my mum what happened and tell her to remove all medication from the house; […]

5/18/2014 2 comments

Gonna be a tough night

by bayareaguy 5/13/2014

written by bayareaguy

Well, for some unknown reason I am just so deeply sad tonight and the tears are flowing.Â I am leaving early tomorrow morning toÂ make the 5 hourÂ drive from PHX to L.A.Â Â …..Â Perhaps I should just keep on driving and make that visit to the GGB………yep…..it’s a bad one tonight….where is the positive energy I’ve been trying to offer on SP…..it sure isn’t with me tonight.

5/13/2014 2 comments

Afraid

by nowheretoruntowards 5/8/2014

written by nowheretoruntowards

I want to die, tonight. But, I’m afraid that someone close would find me. I want to raid my family’s medicine cabinet and drift away in my sleep. But, I’m afraid of the person that would try to wake me up. The sad part is, that no one fully gets that something is wrong with me until it’s something turns into a disaster. But, they will be afraid that it was already too late.

5/8/2014 2 comments

Mesmorized

by whitneyirene 5/5/2014

written by whitneyirene

I cut while taking a bath tonight for the first time. For some reason it was so much better than cutting dry. The blood swirled around in the water, seeping from my skin. It was beautiful. I was almost hypnotized by it.

Also, nothing is better than going to bed with fresh cuts I’ve decided.

5/5/2014 5 comments

Probably gonna fail here

by Remnant The Unbroken 5/3/2014

written by Remnant The Unbroken

Don’t have a headache but took two headache pills that contained aspirin in the hopes of maybe thinning my blood some before I cut. I didn’t last night, but I’m going to do some experimenting tonight.

Doubt it’s gonna work and I’m gonna get globs of coagulated blood on my arm again.

Ah well. I’ll just take some more next time. Then more. And more. Then sit in a nice hot tub. And sleep.

You know what’s funny is my friend texted me today saying her boyfriend is having suicidal thoughts and I’m over here trying to give advice like a damn hypocrite. I told her a […]

5/3/2014 9 comments

The Blue Beetle

by Bisban 5/3/2014

written by Bisban

Le Bettle.
The Ancient.
Into the dust. Millenium, this rust.
The Sphinx, of the Atlantis. God.
In the shape of Dog. What such life.

Lucifer has you by the ball. The horn penetrates.
Into the world that makes no sense.
Battle-cry. Battle-cry. Warriors of Atomic Era, tally zero.
We have already lost the countdown, thousands and millions.
The Devil in the ass. Fuck you, ************.
FBI, save my ass. Be a good cop. Be a good man.
Be a good shepherd. The blue assistance is dead.
Holy… Getting fucked in the ass. You let yourself and your mother.

Hey, that’s not how I wanna end, the night; […]

5/3/2014 3 comments

i wanted to cut tonight

by Remnant The Unbroken 5/2/2014

written by Remnant The Unbroken

But my uncle said that if I really wanted to show I love him I had to not cut tonight so tomorrow I could tell him “good news”.

I mean, I told him to not be mad if I slip, which is proving difficult….but if it will make him happy then okay, I’ll try my best not to. We’ve been through a lot together and he’s almost like my best friend….so I guess it’s the least I could do for him.

Ugh but I can hear that blade calling….”let me kiss your skin….it won’t hurt for long at all”

maybe some music and a good movie will […]

5/2/2014 3 comments

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