I have been reading stories on this site for a long time, but I finally signed up to be able to write something myself tonight. Although I don’t consider myself suicidal, I must admit I have thought about it on more than 1 occasion. I have had a couple times that I really felt like dying, but first of all I would never have the guts. Second,v believe that anything we go through in life can be turned around, but you know what? That’s not why I’m here tonight. I’m here because I figured this is the perfect place to vent and give myself a pity party I guess for the way I feel. A couple hours ago , I was feeling worse, but this is now 5 pills, 2 blunts and a shot of Remy later. Feeling better;) for now. Anyway, I had a relationship that I was in for 5 years+another 2 years of off and on break ups. 2 years ago, I found out he had been cheating on me for years with a willing to be a secret ass hoe.. That’s what we will call her. I honestly didn’t know. I found out because she threatened to tell me and he beat her ass and went to jail. His family tried to lie about it for him, but the truth always comes out. The secret hoe forgot her place!!! She contacted me and told me everything!!! I was destroyed!!! I dated another guy for a little bit after that. Rubbed it in his face!! That was 2 years ago. Since then we have dealt with each other but things have never been the same. I still was there for him because I was all he had. Yea, you would think he would act right because I was really good to him. I don’t believe in cheating and I never cheated on him. That is probably why I am taking this so hard. I want to live again, but not him. I really wish that would have worked though because I love him. V he thinks because he kept it away from home and in the streets I should just get over it., but yet he can’t get over me being with someone when we broke up. Well, I’m going to end the story here for now… I feel better. If you are reading still.. Thanks…. Feel free to message me.. Love to help people
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3 comments
I love your terminology. Them damn secret ass hoes.
I loled at your way of describing that woman haha. But yeah, it’s difficult for someone who cheats to change his ways, and sadly cheating goes along with lying. Do you want a relationship with someone who cheats and/or lies? even if there is love you’d always be in the danger of being cheated again. And just because you do something that you consider a big gesture (being good for him) maybe for the other person it means nothing.
In that sense i can only talk based on a vaguely similar experience i had (forgived a technical infidelity and i was dumped and replaced for a better option when i needed support), but you should never expect too much from someone, that’s only bound to go wrong.
The good thing is you already made the step to move away from him. Hopefully you’ll find better people in your future, and congrats on the don’t believing in cheating thing. At times i think people who don’t cheat on others are a dying breed (sadly).
Totally agree with you M. I also had a similar experience with having forgiven a cheating partner, only to get dumped again. I should have set my expectations low to begin with and then I would not have been so disappointed. Despite all of the nice things that I did for him and all of the emotional support I provided to him over the years, it didn’t mean a hill of beans to him in the end.