I haven’t been here in a while, since I have had a period of happiness. Or at least I thought I had it.
I recently got into highschool. I decided to change schools, since everyone in my past school were either complete idiots or were indifferent with my existence (my so called friends). I always felt alone and depressed. And it was worse when someone was with me, saying things like “I’m there for you”. It hurt the most because those were fake words, and people just could say them like if it was nothing, and then they could just walk away, making me feel […]
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Well, I sure did put my 2.5 cents in today on many comments. I was inspired, for lack of a better word.
Whew. Apparently, a muse somewhere struck me with the writing bug this morning. Or, y’know, too much caffeine to know what to do with myself.
I will be gone for a few days. My mother’s memorial service is tomorrow, and I’m taking the rest of the weekend to remember and honor her. I’m sad she died, but I’m relieved she’s not suffering anymore. I know without a doubt she’s responsible for the events in the past two days. It’s my mother’s undying love […]
Sigh…alright…this needs to be said. Don’t take this as me attacking anyone, because I really don’t want to cause a problem. I was here over a year ago and saw the same thing. It made me leave then because it isn’t what anyone needed. A lot of what I see isn’t true depression, it isn’t true psychological pain. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t doubt that people that post here have rough lives. Everyone has rough patches. A lot of what I see here is simple: a bunch of kids that blow things out of proportion, that assume because one thing bad happened in their […]
This is my first post… I’m not really sure what to say or how to begin…I’m not seeking attention or guidance per say, I only feel the need to vent.
All I know is that I cannot remember the last time I truly felt happy and content in my life. I suppose I won’t go into much detail, but I guess it started when my mom went to jail for the first time a few years back.
I struggled with my life over the next few years, and I still do. But lately I’ve just felt it hard. I don’t want to continue on with my life. […]
I feel like I have this disorder. It’s not official now, as it had been removed due to controversy, according to good ol’ always-100%-trustworthy Wikipedia. Still, I just can’t help but wonder why people are so positive if everyone is going to die, and we all live just to be slaves to people that have more money or fame than us. I always think about whether or not I should or if I am going to off myself. I don’t do it, though, because I have the slightest hope that something good will last until the day I die, and I also feel that I […]
Maybe apart,
But you’re in my heart.
Far, far away,
Yet here to stay.
You complete my soul.
You make me whole.
This poem’s for you.
My soul mate so true.
I love you my dear.
I so wish you were here.
🙂
i got depressed and binged drank for almost 5 years and ruined my relationships with everyone i know….iam 27 and my health feels messed up from all the drinking..i can only breath out of one nostril at a time now and i dont really want to be here anymore….my family just watched me crash and didnt do anything to try and stop me….or help me…and now i repeat the same thing over and over about how i ruined my life…and they say its annoying….
i had a mental breakdown and was put on meds……. and while i was on my 5 year bindge i made a […]
I force myself to go out alone. It is a feeble attempt to pretend I have a life. Everyone always says go out meet people do your own thing. Blah Blah Blah. I do freaking everything alone what I miss is human companionship. So, I am out having a beer watching football. I am surrounded by groups of friends and families. I am jealous and sad. I look and wonder what it is they have I don’t that. I can’t be that bad, my therapist always said everyone deserves love as is. As is in the sense of big small issues or no issues. It’s […]
You think I’m fat? Cool. You think I’m a loner ? Fine by me, love the comment. You think I’m ugly? What wait….sorry I was looking for a fuck to give.
It amazes me that people could be so cruel and uncaring towards another person. They whisper and point, my mother always told me pointing was rude as was bullying. It hurts honestly to hear what I already know. I guess the words coming from someone else’s mouth hurts a lot worse. I look in an reflective surface and immediately I feel self conscious.
I hide it. Laugh it off and joke around. It’s not that hard, […]
I just.. I feel so empty. Yeah, normally its easy to laugh it off and hide behind a mask, act normal, human even. But right now, when I’m sitting at home and in bed, all of my walls come down. I feel so weak and hopeless- and of course my parents choose this very moment to tell me how worthless I am and how I’ll never amount to anything and how I should have been more like my brother. The worst part? I agree with them.
I’m not anything special; I don’t have any outstanding talents- and trust me on this. I can read people […]
The utility of this platform to convey inner thoughts and true emotion is unmatched. I can express myself even though I’m talentless. Look let me skip the formalities of how I usually write and just get to it. I feel guilty. I was reading the first post on SP (this was approximately 1 month ago) and I realized this is a website where you’re supposed to share experiences of suicide. Anything else is viewed as unnecessary. I’ve only posted here a few times, but most of my pieces do not spare detail. But never have I wrote about my suicide attempts, nor do I plan […]
A few weeks ago I came across an article in the New York Times about a man and his love for his cat. It was surprisingly interesting despite the subject matter and reflected on bits of human nature that would be applicable to more than just ones relationship with their cat/pet.
From the article: “I’ve speculated that people have a certain reservoir of affection that they need to express, and in the absence of any more appropriate object – a child or a lover, a parent or a friend – they will lavish the same devotion on a pug or a manx or a cockatiel, even […]
my real name is Mark, but I prefer to be called Maciee. I came on here to find advice and possibly a way past this time.
it started when I was 7 or 8, wanting to be dressed up as a girl and to wear makeup, to be beautiful and comfortable in the pink and frills instead of the disgusting monster truck t-shirts and baseball caps. my mom died before i turned 5, but i know if she was still here she would have supported me now. i’m 12 years old, (soon to be 13 in a week counting today!). I live with my dad and […]
You stood there, stood there and start to slowly back away,
You said that those close to you didn’t think that speaking to me was healthy, that it had thrown your thoughts into disarray.
It’s not worth the trouble or the heartache they told you,
And somehow you decided that it was true.
“There is no reason to stay as she’ll never see things clearly.”
With this you pacified yourself, never seeing that it might cost you dearly.
I stood there, stood there forgotten and alone.
You had said that my stubbornness was something that you could no longer condone,
But stubbornness had never been the problem.
In order to reach you, I had […]
He’s stood by my side through my depression, went above and beyond, more than anyone else would ever even think about. He stayed with me after my last attempt and tried to get me help. I can’t explain how much i owe him. Now though I’m nothing more than a burden. He see’s me as a parasite and i can see it in his eyes when he’s angry hed love nothing more than to squash me like one. Or if i just dropped dead everything would be ok for him, everything would be better. I’ve been on meds for a year now and they have […]
Hi. My name is mike. I’m only 22 and I have two sons. My life has been a train wreck. In had my second son with a woman who stole my heart. She is my everything. I messed up in the beginning of the relationship, talking to other girls online. She found out later after we got married. Yea we worked passed it but we had problems thru out the marriage. I was always drinking when I got emotional and down. I threatened to cut myself or not take my insulin. Things I should of never done. We would have problems an I would run […]
If ur ready to make a life choice to go on your next journey make sure u know what is there waiting for you.in ever life you are given only one gift of true love ..if u didnt respect the gift of love God gave you .and u think your all alone ..pray to God to have mercy on you and to grant u one more gift of love that you will not abuse .one love you would be willing to sacrifice your life for ..I did now I have a perfect wife and 3 perfect children ..that I will sacrifice my life for ..and […]
The only time when I am happy
Is when Im out of this reality
Its when I close my eyelids
And dissapear from everything
I wish I dont have to wake up
I wish I could be like sleeping beauty
Sleep till the true kiss wakes her up
And live happily ever after
But im no princess
Im just a slave to every person that I know
I’ll be suffering all day long
But not when im asleep
Hey everyone, I don’t know if anyone here knows who Frank Iero is but I absolutly adore him. Last year he made a demo of a song called ‘joyriding’. The song, and the lyrics, is so breathtaking beautiful, relateble and feels so true. Let’s just say I cried and listen to it on repeat when It came out. And now, he has released it as a real single for his upcoming album! Thought Id share it.
Lyrics:
i’m not sure what they said, but if it’s true i’ll bet it’s just one more thing i’ll regret. i hate my weaknesses, they made me who i am. “yea, […]
So I wrote a post, actually my first post on this site entitled “Wasted Life”. It was pretty much about the story of me and my ex-girlfriend and the effect its had on my life for the last twenty years. It was a story that I felt I needed to share with somebody…anybody to show the extent that one person can have on your life when you focus all your love on them and no one else. I received some good comments from others on there when I posted it, and today I received a few other comments, which surprised me since I didn’t think […]