I’ve been thinking alot lately and I’ve come to the conclusion that life is a waste. I kinda just want to disappear. Crumble away and let a primordial wind blow away my remains. I don’t have anyone to talk to. My “friends” only show up when they need stuff so I’ve distanced myself from them. I don’t have family. I might as well be an orphan, they let me drift around aimlessly and treat me like scum. I was a good child. Great grades. Nice job. Almost finish with college. But I guess all they see is someone to benefit from. As for love, I […]
Tag:
wind
Physically invisible,
mentally incurable,
Fiercely unstable,
I’m like the wind.
Mountains are in my way,
Skyscrapers disturb my stay,
I roam freely at bay,
I’m like the wind.
I slip endlessly into emptiness,
My existence is meaningless,
My destinations are aimless,
I’m like the wind.
For hatred it has sympathy,
In riches it lives simply,
It travels as if with a symphony,
I need to be more like the wind.
I have to tell someone before I go – see, the world has been draining of color for a while now, all the blood seeping out like snow melting on the ground…and today I saw something. It whispered in my ear to go. There was a person smiling in the orange rock by the window, and then he was gone. He had jumped to the top of the pine tree overlooking the hotel, he was waving, waving madly, his face so faint that the wind could erase it.
This reality is a lie, it’s a sham, – I have to go to the Kalahari desert before the […]
Hate is what we possess there is no other way scapegoats got us no where captured as the lies within us we’re trapped nothing in between us go on, come closer follow my soft spoken voice, I dare you I can almost hear you breathing in silence your heart beats touched by the cruel chill of your presence I’m burning, fading into dust of ashes blowing in the wind you’ve ripped me apart covered with pale white shrouds being deprived of your absence has ordered my withdraw I am no longer searching left alone lifeless goodbye my love, I hate you.
so I told you to look up , look up to the sky but I never said to say goodbye. You got those scares across your arms you know what’s wrong but not what’s right. As you smile in the moonlight I turn around (drip drop ,drip drop) are you okay? I’ll come back another day. Are you OK are OK are you okay ? You tell your mother that you’re fine you tell your friends that you’ll be alright you’ll be alright as you look at me and I look at you I could see the darkness shining right through so I’ll ask one […]
Not sure how to make since of anything.. Between hearing seeing and feeling things I’m unsure are real or not or the strange thoughts and being afraid of it all.. The other day it was pouring rain and the wind shield wipers were on high the water quickly beading and dripping down again all I could see was blood… I wished for it and hoped for it … I’m so tired of holding this feeling in.. Some ppl say it’s all a lie some just think I’m crazy but why? Why is that what I thought of ? Because of the long addiction I had/have […]
OK this is my big RANT post of the day or even the week. I call it WHATS THE POINT. (( dont read it if your sensitive ))
Ive been around for more than 4 decades and after all my days of living I find that there are certain things that just really suck about life in general.
One) Life is not fair. Some people are born into well off familys and have a loving careing family that provides a good childhood for them and able to supply them with all a child needs to be happy and to havea good education and proper nutrition etc. While […]
I need help fml fml oh my god I can’t take life anymore. The girls at school won’t leave me alone, the guys hate me. I try to be nice but always wind up being the mean one because they hurt me. Freshman year sucks I only get 3 hours of sleep a day and every night I chug down 6-7 sleeping pills hoping I’ll die but sAdly wake up the next day. everyone thinks im a whore though I’ve nevr done anything sexual in my life. Im basically my little sister second mom. no purpose here. If I left nobody would really care. Maybe […]
I sit here on my own. Just waiting for someone to realize that I am an island. I wish someone would be brave enough to row out to sea, just to stumble upon me. But instead I sit here, alone and deserted. Minutes, days, months pass without human contact. Just me and my thoughts, swirling around like a hurricane. They batter my mind like wind against a wall, they tear me up by the roots and toss me around like I’m nothing. I guess I am nothing. If an island is never discovered, did it ever exist? I kind of doubt it.
But I will sit […]
i can feel the sting as the blood trickles down my arms
i can feel the water rushing in my nose, my ears, my lungs
i can feel the rope tightening and my breath slowing down
i can feel the wind whipping past after i step off
i can feel so strongly that i sometimes feel nothing at all
8/09/14
4:10 am
He had eyes like coffee and hair like bread, skin like winter and brain like hell. He had lips like razors and heart like sun. He had beard like leafs and touch as cold. He loved me like spring, and left like the wind. He changed like the seasons, forgetting me.
I dont want sex, I dont want children, nor father or mother, brother or sister. No matter how hard I try to distance myself from others my body craves warmth. I just want warmth, to hold someone regardless of gender, to feel safe even as the world crumbles to dust. No words, no thoughts, just the sound of leaves rustling in heavenly wind, the smell of fragrant flowers eternally blooming in my dream, and the feeling of another close to me as I sleep eternal. Would any of you be so kind as to look pass the base desire for procreation […]
“She stood in the storm and, when the wind did not blow her way, she adjusted her sails.” – Elizabeth Edwards
Listening to my immortal right now by amy lee, it looks like my past has come back to haunt me, like death is silently calling me, someone is calling me in this wind, someone wants me, loves me, and i need to commit suicide to see that person. the years i have lived are nothing, im empty as my soul, i have nothing to live for, like.. my parents mean nothing to me, nobody means anything to me. do you understand how i feel ?
down long rodes we ride
no light insite no end near
scars on my arm like wrighting read only by me
i know evry line ever virse
i know the name of ech of the people who put them there
im a cobweb the strans are cut in to my flesh
i cach no flys just pane and greef
my head is a monster ready to rip my heart out
it sends me screeming in to the nigh
“that girls not really there”
the girl at the end of my bed isunt there
the blood on the floor isunt there
im a child […]
6 frends dead and gone ash and rot and blood jumping swinging bleeding out my hands coverd in blood dieing loseing razor cut were i cant scrach the itch i had there names in my skin and now there gone in the wind like there last breth the world forgot them quickly i never will but there names are lost forever the faces are in the front of my mind i love them all i love them all
I am my feet, and my ways. Guided by peace to this day. I need my needs, cause I am sand. So I will slip in to your hands, and beyond your reach.
I speak the words holding me, like clashing these bricks and these swords, cutting deep through my soul. I reap the rewards for good seeds and still retain some sort of piece to myself.
I am my feet, no, not my name. Guided by hate through this game. I need release from this place and the chains still draining me until this day.
I am my search and my sins. Guided by […]
Our time together felt like a storm, like wild wind and rain, like something too big to handle but too powerful to escape. It blew around me and tangled my hair, left water on my face, made me know that I am alive, alive, alive. There were moments of calm and pause as there are in every storm, and moments when our words fork lightening, at least for each other.
I’ll come, soon….and we’ll have our love again.
My material possessions are starting to consume my life
There is just too much shit I don’t need and I’m paying too much for living expenses when I could be saving tons of money. This isn’t survival, and it’s not working. I have some debt too.
Gonna start selling off and throwing away pretty much half of everything. Ill have to give up my fish tank I guess 🙁 I really wanted to keep them for the next 10 years or so but I need to be light on my feet and go where the wind takes me. I need to get the hell away […]
Like fleeting winds we travel, dipping across the slope of currents, lying suspended in the grasp of ebbing free fall, sucked into the satisfying regression of ephemeral flight. Your essence is wrapped around me, coating my spirit in the intensity of all your aggregated passion. We bear wings but no consciousness of them, allowing us to maneuver without thought and guided by the subconscious will of pure sentience. I’m beyond captivated by your presence, inebriated by the sustenance provided by your existence and the warm, chilly elation buzzing in my skin from your touch. The night swirls around us, breezes twirling and propelling our ascent, […]