Lately things haven’t been looking up to me. It’s been brining me down to my lowest point, to the point were I don’t feel like my family or friends care about me anymore and I want to die. Everyone always compares me to someone I’m not and that makes me wish I was someone else. I wrote my suicide note out to my closest friends incase I make the drastic decision. I know who to send the message to and hopefully they will allow me to go in peace. I’m not taking my life anytime soon (I don’t think) but if things don’t look up for me, I might just do it.
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2 comments
I’m not making light of what you say but going the way of suicide might be a little drastic for what very well be something short-term for you. I make no judgement however. It’s tough being compared to people, why can’t you just be appreciated for you, right? I’m sure that you feel compelled to defend yourself every time you are compared and that’s not fair. Being compared can drain you and hamper your sense of esteem and other things I am sure. It’s tough.
I’m not entirely sure what you should do but perhaps consider talking with the person/persons doing the comparing and ensure that they understand your feelings. Sometimes people make comparisons to motivate, not understanding the negative impact. Some comparisons are normal but it can sometimes become excessive and it is this that can wear a person down. Consider talking about it openly, at least give them that opportunity before you do anything else.
I don’t know everything you’ve been going through, but I think things could look up for you. However, it doesn’t sound like you have any plans to make improvements. That’s understandable and it’s completely fine, but resting things on fate is taking a bit of a risk, especially when you’re in a very negative mindset. You’re probably more likely to see the bad in what happens next, and see it for worse than it is. Try to keep that in mind. I agree with Mark, it also could help to talk to the people doing the comparing. Best wishes to you. You can get through this. 🙂 And please keep posting here if it helps.