I’m tired and frustrated. With my crummy life, my crummy broken body, and with chronically bad shit always happening to me. I’m tired of it all.
Why wasn’t I instantly killed during the car accident? Having to slowly suffer every single fucking ache and pain and complication like not being able to breathe, not being able to walk properly, losing feeling in my arms or legs, or even holding a pen in my hand without my whole arm shaking, is a fate worse than death.
And it gets worse every year. Wtf am I supposed to do? How am I supposed to live a decent life not being able to sleep, not being able to breathe, and (2 of 3) not being able to feel all my limbs? I know being angry and wallowing in self-pity isn’t going to help, but seriously wtf am I supposed to do? All I can do is watch my body and my life slide deeper and deeper into hell.
And no, I never attempted suicide. Some asshole decides to not stop at a red light and I have to pay the price, with the rest of my life.
I’ve already had a very hard shit life before this, so what the f*ck? Why the f*ck do I have to suffer like this? So f*ck you world and all your evil plans and all your suffering. I f*cking hate you and I hate my sh*t ass life. F*ck you.
5 comments
I’m sorry.
I cannot say I understand because I don’t know how it feels. But I know how it feels to die inside. One of my best friends a year ago was driving in a car with their brother. He was severly intoxicated and he slammed into a car and that car slammed into the passager side of their car. My friend died that night. Her brother was fine, but he suffers with guilt every night. He was only 17. His parents never forgave him neither did I. Every year on June 26th I go to her grave and stay there for an hour. Talking to it like shes still there. Talking back to me. Replying with a warm hug and a soft smile. Just consider yourself lucky to be alive. It may be bad right now. But I can asure you God, will give you your body back.
Did the person who hit you get punished?
People do not think about who they may endanger with just one action.
Or one slip of not paying attention.
No, the asshole didn’t even get a slap on the wrist. He gets off scott free for running down someone and nearly committing murder. Great world we I’ve in.
Great world we Iive* in. Note the sarcasm.
that is why life is bah.