Today I was going to do it. I was really going to just die. I had it all planned. I’d take some painkillers, benedryl, sleeping pills, whatever I could find and go to sleep and never wake up. I’d listen to the song Asleep by the Smiths, and then it’d all be over. I wouldn’t have to worry about not being able to work, because of how depressed I am, or about the slowly mountain of debt that I’ve built up. I wouldn’t have to worry about being 29 and still living at home, and most of all I wouldn’t have to worry about being alone anymore. Death would just wash over me like a blanket. It’d all be over. What made me stop?? I don’t know, maybe it was this site, maybe it was all the posts I’ve read of people who have it bad. I don’t know if I’ll keep living tomorrow, but I do know that I’ll live for the moment.
7 comments
7 comments
Thank you so much mr madder, for staying in this world with me.<3
Glad I’m here, for now. Thanks for the support, but it’s Ms. Madder lol
I’m glad you’re here, too… Things are tough here at the moment… but we can work through our worries.
I appreciate it, and I’m here for you guys if you need me 🙂
Morrissey. I miss the 80’s.
Seems like you found a source of inner strength.
Bully for you.
May it carry you to the next moment and the next.
you have it better than me. I think about suicide almost on a daily basis, cry myself to sleep and I am only 12 years old. all the quizzed that I took say that I have moderate to severe depression