I am cold and callus. I am a *****. I am always tired, no matter how much I sleep. I am always angry, always upset, and my days seem to have become very very long. I am very young but I despise the person I am. I always have. Not even eighteen, and I already believe that it isn’t going to get better. I am unhappy. I can’t be proud of myself. I can’t be around my friends anymore. I have no love in my life because I don’t know how to accept it. I am too afraid to talk to anyone. I need help. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know where to start to fix this. My family wants me back, and my friends want me back… but I just don’t feel the same anymore and sometimes I don’t want to be here.
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I had some tough times before I turned 18… and I was tempted to do the same thing and withdraw from friends and family. For a while, isolation lets you collect your thoughts and breathe a little. But being lonely for an extended period of time doesn’t help you… and it can make things harder.
So much can change after you turn 18. High school ends… and college, the military, or the working world begin. You can make new decisions, move somewhere you like, and have the freedom to try things that you’re not doing today. To get to that point, you need to work hard today. Build your foundation for the future. Most importantly, DON’T GIVE UP!
Where to start? Re-connect with the people in your life. Don’t go through this alone.