the unwanted

i feel unloved and not wanted… my friends seem to only use me for there own needs but when it comes to my feelings it does not matter. im a nobody… why wont anyone listen to me? why wont anyone lend me a shoulder to cry on? everyone constantly makes fun of me and my looks… i know i dont look good but i still… if they only knew how fucked up i was then maybe just maybe they will care for me as much as my beloved did. at the same time i have a feeling that most of my so called friends would leave me, they would rather not put up with my crap… they all say i will never find a person to love since im apparently so flamboint… do you know how hard it is for me to hear something like that or no one will love me because of who i am?