Annoyance

So yesterday my mom decided to pinch at my zits because I am ugly as hell. I naturally dislike this since it hurts a ton. Well needless to say she got all pissed off, and that got me upset also. So she makes me apologize for being angry and I do so but not actually caring. So she yells at me some more and tells me to fuck off. I go up to my room and start reading some Zelda manga. That helps me forget about whatever bad things happen, so I like video games. So my mom comes upstairs and interrupts my ritual, and gets me raging even more so. She want a conversation, which is really her just trying to prove her point. Long story short, my dad comes home and beats me up for being such a bad son. I don’t know if you can tell but I am very emotional. Nobody at school knows, but I only have extreme emotions: ecstasy, rage, and depression. This all started with my mom trying to pop my zits (only pain in my eyes, which=rage) and eventually lead to depression. I know that I have a pretty bad problem, and I also have another personality; suicidal. Duh. Every time I get really angry and depressed, I start thinking about dying. It comforts me when I think about how shitty I am. I’ve also decided to try scratching, and I’m going to try when I gag the chance. This all feels like me trying to get attention, so I feel guilty somehow of writing this. I’m obviously not as angry now, and I’m going to do another little statement every now and then, it helps me vent. Sorry, I suck at writing so this isn’t written very well. Please leave help or whatever you want.