Ive decided to go get a rope tomorrow from the hardware shop instead of going to see my doctor. Everyday im getting worse, ive been on various types of antidepressants and they have all made me even more anxious and fucked up like i was on a pill or something. Im done trying to get better, I dont give a fuck about what happens to me anymore. Ive got a bunch of pills i plan on dropping with some alcohole before i jump.
My options are as follows :
ramming my car into a tree at high speed
taking all of these pills i have and putting a plastic bag over my head
jumping off my local bridge into oncoming traffic
hanging myself
ive deciding hanging will be most effective as i will most certainly die that way.
Ive become bulimic again and i feel like absolute shit everyday. My whole body is in pain and im convinced it is possesed by something evil and sick. My head is killing me.
Im sick of living in physical and emotional pain every fucking day. I cant even cry anymore.
A few days ago i was at the local cemetry looking for people the same age as me. I think thats where ill hang myself.
4 comments
Don’t die instead if you really want help, talk to someone. If you don’t have someone to talk to then talk to me, I’m willing to help. You can keep your details anonymous and I’m not going to question your personal details. What matters is just letting out how you feel to someone who can listen. I have been through the same but then i went and met my college psychologist to whom i told how i felt. We had meetings often and now i feel much much better and not depressed. She also told me what i could do to be happy and feel meaningful again. Always know you’re not the only one, there are millions of people just like you. I really hope you are feeling better and i will pray for you that you will feel happy and cheerful again!! 🙂
I really wish i could dedicate this to you on the radio to make you feel better…
Well, I know the feeling
Of finding yourself stuck out on the ledge
And there ain’t no healing
From cutting yourself with the jagged edge
I’m telling you that, it’s never that bad
Take it from someone who’s been where you’re at
Laid out on the floor
And you’re not sure you can take this anymore
So just give it one more try to a lullaby
And turn this up on the radio
If you can hear me now
I’m reaching out
To let you know that you’re not alone
And if you can’t tell, I’m scared as hell
‘Cause I can’t get you on the telephone
So just close your eyes
Oh, honey here comes a lullaby
Your very own lullaby
Please let me take you
Out of the darkness and into the light
‘Cause I have faith in you
That you’re gonna make it through another night
Stop thinking about the easy way out
There’s no need to go and blow the candle out
Because you’re not done
You’re far too young
And the best is yet to come
So just give it one more try to a lullaby
And turn this up on the radio
If you can hear me now
I’m reaching out
To let you know that you’re not alone
And if you can’t tell, I’m scared as hell
‘Cause I can’t get you on the telephone
So just close your eyes
Oh, honey here comes a lullaby
Your very own lullaby
Well, everybody’s hit the bottom
Everybody’s been forgotten
When everybody’s tired of being alone
Yeah, everybody’s been abandoned
And left a little empty handed
So if you’re out there barely hanging on…
Just give it one more try to a lullaby
And turn this up on the radio
If you can hear me now
I’m reaching out
To let you know that you’re not alone
And if you can’t tell, I’m scared as hell
‘Cause I can’t get you on the telephone
So just close your eyes
Oh, honey here comes a lullaby
Your very own lullaby
Oh, honey here comes a lullaby
Your very own lullaby
Thanks for your kind words and enthusiasm but this has been going on for years now and in the last few months ive just gotten worse and worse and worse. Everyone is sick of me being around i can just tell.
thanks anyways
Maybe they are a bunch of losers.. Honestly, i think you’d find better people who’d love you for who you are. Don’t give up just yet. What do you want to be happy again? I prayed for you yesterday and i won’t stop. I have a good feeling that you’ll be happy again and feeling suicidal will be so yesterday. I’m praying hard so you’d be fine and i believe it’s going to work! Don’t worry.. Take Care