exactly how feel all the time..but i see it as, me fortunate enough to get the death sentence. like thats ganna happen? i try and try to get out it never works. im stuck in hell of earth as a prisoner but i will never be set free…this sucks:/
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A few more years honey. Just have to make it a few more years….I’m sorry it’s like that.
@zacurious: thanks, and yes a few years..to many
Fakingit. I know but you’ve hung on this long. I want you to be able to get out on your own. Things will be so different.
@zacurious: i know but life is hard
Fakingit- way too hard, I agree. I don’t want to deal with life anymore than you do. You are dealing with a lot. I hope you can just vent here and talk to us so you don’t do anything to hurt yourself. You’ve already been through enough.
I wish I can say or do anything to help … Great strength comes from enduring pain. Experiences will soon teach you to be wise. The night is darkest just before the dawn. And I assure you, dawn is coming.
@zacurious: i post daily unless the rare days im actually living life. im trying not to hurt myself but the urge tonight is strong..i have been through a lot but no where near as much as most people on here
@BlueHappiness: ok well since u just me if i say whats going on it wont make ANY sense but my strength comes from giving in i do EVERYTHING cuz in a way im a mom (a horrible one if anything) my parents dont parent i do most of it my sister has no rules my parents parent me i parent my sister my parents suck at parenting me and im abused by my sister making my parents and i not even parents in ayway my sister wns every battle and i just dont care what my parents say they put me through enough hell..sorry this probably makes NO sense
@fakingit I’m trying as hard as i can to understand. So you take care of your sister but she’s also abusive to you? … Anyways, THERE IT IS !! “I just dont care what my parents say” .. You have the key to your own happiness. Stop caring about them. Think of them as house guests or people living next door. Just hold on until you graduate and your life will turn around.
@BlueHappiness: exactly, so my parents parent me and i parent my sister except she abuses me. and haha yes thats exactly what i do with my parents their just guests. but that still doesnt make me happy im just unhappy i will be happy when im no longer in the house which is in hopefully 3 yrs but thats 3 yrs 2 many..ive considered running away but if i get caught id eventually have to come back home.. i dont want that.
@fakingit. Don’t down play what you’ve been through. It’s a lot. I’m on here almost 24/7. At work at home, all the time. I just don’t post like I said before. I have that same urge too almost every night, but I give into it. I hope you can hold out for your roller coaster to go up a bit and maybe not hurt yourself.
@zacurious: i doubt i can hold on any longer i just wanna be done
@fakingit You CAN!! Okay? You will hold on. Please don’t let them win. I know you think they already have, but you know better. Don’t give in!
@zacurious: im tryin but now im in tears hanging one handed off a cliff i wanna let go but dont wanna hurt the people i have
@fakingit if you do let go, you’re going to hurt me too … 🙁
@BlueHappiness: ahhh, just another person i can add to the list why i fail at suicide, i HATE hurting people.