I am definitely in a bad place right now. I started cutting again and i am desperate for someone to talk to openly, admitting i have a problem.
There is one person who knows this and ignores it by saying i should know better, and it makes sense. But it is not easy to stop just like that, i have some good periods and than it gets worse. I cut so badly, i cut all the way through the flesh, and it disgusts me the other day. People are already noticing i have to many scars, i keep lying but i don’t know what to say anymore. it becomes obvious. that is why i started to cut my legs and the scars are big and terrible. it hurts like crazy and i am afraid that it will get infected or sth and i don’t know what to do, i already bought an aid kit for emergencies like this. I am so lonely and i wish i could tell someone about this and every time i think this through i know it will only make things worse. Â Right now i am so numb, i do that for that feeling, after i cut instead of sadness i fell this numbness or nothing at all. I really need someone who will tell me what to do. When i stare at the wounds i know i should get help, i am aware of it now. I really want to get out of this bloody hell, but don’t know how???
2 comments
The sooner you stop cutting the easier it will be. Like an addiction every time you cut you only reinforce your need for it. If you type in the words/ on depression and associated philosophies /into the suicide project search bar and click on my post it has a section on cutting and seeking help.
You don’t have to be in this “bloody hell” forever.
You are brilliant. Look at you.
How aware you are of how helpless you are. You are a good friend to yourself.
Listen, that person who tells you “you should know better”
doesn’t know any better
sadly.
The cutting isn’t the issue.
But what is?
What causes the cutting?
That
is the issue.
What causes the cutting..?