I can’t go on anymore. Â The pain is to much for me to handle, no one wants me, my mother kicked me out, my father is on the brink. My life is just lies. LIes about school, love, and health. I am not fine…so why do I keep saying I am? I am broken and bruised the only way I feel anything is when the cool metal of the blade touches my skin, I promised I would stop. I can’t .
Death th constant in my life- thoughts,actions,success- my goal, my one and only goal
13 comments
Yes you can go on. Why is that you hurt yourself? Dont punish yourself anymore.
You can change your life and make it all better, it will be hard, but it can be better.
I think this wont be of any consolation, but at least it seems you got reason to be sad about. Imagine me, I dont really have reasons, I am just broken inside.
Don’t do anything silly. Hold on to life, and use it for something you will be proud of. Life is already, many times, a dark place, dont make it worse by leaving.
And stop thinking of death. Think of what you like about yourself, there has to be something. Think of the future, although it seems grim, if you work hard, it can be great. And maybe talk to your mom about how you feel, if she doesn’t know what you are going through, she cant help you. And dont be afriad to say you are sorry. Tell her you are sorry for anything you have done that could cause you to kick you away. And tell her how you feel. You are still in school, life, love and health, all will get better, but just if you believe in yourself and work hard. I believe in you. You can do it.
I have been living in this hell bordering on 6 years and it has only gotten worse. I just want the eternal bliss and emptiness.
You should be brave and struggle on. You are so young. When you feel the same way when you hit 35+ you have a reason. There is so much help out there if you are hurting. Please reach out because your future could be amazing and you’ll never know.
I may be young but I am old enough to know that nothing I do will make the love of my family return I want to live but not like this. It is an uphill battle and I am not making it any closer to the top
Have you looked for professional help? Have you talked to your parents about it? I tell you, family always loves you. Even if you do very crazy stuff, you just push them away because of disapointment, but you can gain them back.
And you have to work for it.
There is no bliss in the emptiness, and if you fail, there could be terrible consequences 🙁
I have tried professional help numerous times it doesn’t work I am always the one in the wrong
Well it sounds like you are very younge. At that age is harder, but just keep working hard, and everything is going to get solved. Talk to your mom, I think that is important.
I know how you feel, you just want to say no to everything and just keep going in that negative train of thought, believe me I know. But stop it.
Focus on good things, there has to be something at least, that you like about yourself. What is it? I know your life can be better. And I know you can do it. Just for once in your mind, say yes, and try it for you. You can be happy, and make this world better. By leaving it, you will make it worse. If anything, think of it as a challenge, an epic fight. You are fighiting and so far you are wining. So everything is not wrong, you are strong. It is just that what you are dealing with is extremely hard.
I wish i could help you more, but believe, your life can be better, it is just matter of time and work. And i know you can do it 🙂
I’m fifteen. I try so hard to hard it is exhausting. I am tired all of the time. I want to die but I am scared. I cut but I haven’t done it in a while I have been trying to stop but I cant keep myself any longer it takes to much effort. I am so depressed. Everything I love has just become so mundane and boring even writing, my one and only release besides cutting isn’t fun anymore. I don’t know what to do anymore
Are you eating and sleeping well?
Have you told your mom about your problem? You don’t have to fake you are fine with everyone. I think you need to visit a professional regularly and talk to your mom about your problem. Improve your eating and sleeping patterns is very important too.
You are only 15, but life wasn’t too happy at 15, and although it may seem impossible to believe, you can make your life better.
Do you have a particular reason to be sad about? Or you are just sad and cant tell why?
You have to do things you used to enjoy, even if you dont enjoy them now, you will get back to it again. And there are things that you will have to do you dont enjoy, like I dont know maybe studing geography, try to look for a partner to do that. Someone that will make it easier on you.
I promise it can get better 🙂
I’m barely eating and I sleep way too much and when I am not at school or sleeping I am in my bed laying in the dark hoping that my family will forget that I am there. I would talk to my mom but she is the reason I am like this. Everytime I see her it is a constant stream of hate that never ends. I am a horrible daughter and she doesn’t love me, I have tried to talk to her but the last time we got even close to talking was when a friends mom told her that I was cutting again and she didn’t believe it because she couldn’t see them I was “trying to get attention”. I feel so repulsive because not even my own mother loves me and before now I didn’t think that was possible. I have tried to kill myself before and she didn’t care at all. I don’t talk to my mom because when I do things get ten times worse. I know you’re trying to help and I am grateful but I have been dealing with this borderline 6 years, I used to believe that it would get better but I’ve lost all hope now…
Look, your mom is just scared, is hard to believe and accept what you are going through. You are not a horrible person, you are just sad, at the very least, and I know how you feel at your mom. You need to forgive her, for her limitations. You got a friend in me, if you need to talk, I will talk to you. Don’t do it, because really things can get better, and with time you can even get along with your mom. I have told my parents I want to die many times, I do this when i loose control, and I know they dont understand, they are afraid deep inside to believe such thing. It is just normal.
Start eating well, and sleep in a better pattern. Bad eating and bad sleeping, makes you feel 200 times worse, and this is not just dumb talk, this is for real. It is very important that you fix that. I can asure you, it gets better. Doing excercise it is a good thing too. WHen you start feeling stronger and more powerful, it makes you feel much better with yourself. You are younge, your life is all ahead. And even if was 6 years, is nothing compared with the time you have ahead to enjoy. Hold on, fight it off, I know you can do it. You seem a nice person, and I know you dont really want to do it, if you need a reson, you are the reason, you can make this world better.
Why is that you hate your mom? IS because how she has reacted about your depression problem? Or is other stuff? If there is just teh depression problem, well i tell you, it can be fixed 😀
When it comes to this depression stuff, well you are teh adult, and she is the child. She doesnt understand. Have you asked her directly “please mom help me”? Sometimes is more the way you approach than the real problem.
You are not repulsive, and even if your mom is the worst person of the world, it is not your fault. I dont think this is the case. But if she is crazy it has nothing to do with you. I think some sort of activity, like martial arts would really help you.
You are angry, and i can so totally relate, but you can get better and be happy, please dont give up.
Thank you…I tried to do it but I couldn’t…I can’t do it. Your right .
Well you just need to work on yourself a bit more, so you can talk to your mom. I am here to help you in any way I can. I tell you, i am sure you can do it. And i know things can get better, and will be better 😀