I have been holding on for too long and I am slipping. I have no one up top to reach down and grab me, pull me up; and I have no one to catch me when I fall. I was once on the edge now I am dangling and ready to fall. I thought I could handle the weight of the world, fight on towards my future until the day I die. But I can’t. The world is depressing even-though there is so much fun around. I am so heart-broken even though I have friends, family, and a boyfriend who love me dearly. You may think that I am nothing what I am writing, but I may be here physically and in person but in truth, I am mentally gone, far far away, I am so dead inside I can barely breathe. My soul is shattered into nothing but ashes and dust. I am sorry for leaving those I love and who love me back but I cannot take it any more, I cannot take the fact that I will be nothing but a twit, a great expectation that does not and never will involve my hopes and dreams, a robot, and many more. I had so many people telling me to hang on, things will get better, you will become the man you were meant to be and will. I sought for help months ago, therapy, I still cannot fight on, move on any longer. I am done…
I love my family for they adopted me, took care of me, and loved me, even-though we have our ups and downs.
I love my friends for they are like family, they supported and loved me as well as helpped.
I love my boyfriend for he kept me going and I love him. So please, my love, move on, but know I will always love and be watching you.
And to my enemies, of course I feel hurt but you are not the reason believe it or not. You may be part of it but only a tiny portion.
Please do not blame yourself, do not feel sorry for I will be in a better place, heaven or hell I don’t know where I will end up but all I know is that I will no longer be stressed out majorly nor depressed.
I love you all, including my enemies and beyond,
Hunter Crowley Nightshade