This f*cking sentence… change your attitude. They are not only implying that whatever you are going trough is your fault, but they have not a single parcel of empathy for you. I have had a lot of friends who never seemed to take me seriously and told me this shit. They think that they are so strong for not being like you, like they do right in life and you are only there in pain because you want to. You genuinely decide to suffer and be “negative” and cut yourself from the wonderful beauty of life.. yeah sorry to see things as they are. They said they have gone trough bad moments too but kept their head up and kept thinking positive. Well their shit is nothing! They have never experienced 1/10 of what we might feel everyday but they still have the fucking arrogance of reprehending you. They do something and it hurts your feeling but it’s your fault anyway. Why the people who claims to be happy try so much to make us feel like shit even more? My “friend” for months kept doing a lot mean things toward me and never including me in anything. I tried to talk to her really politely exposing what was hurting me and asking if she could be a little bit more careful. I really don’t understand why but she got reaaaally mad at me and started to do worst and I mean what the fuck. Then she told me it was because of my negative attitude I let myself in the misery because I liked it and ugh just fuck you, seriously. This so-called friend selfish and self-centred never do anything wrong it’s well known. Now she’s still mad at me for fucking no reason and how can you be such a bad friend like this? Change your attitude… well instead of supporting me, not judging and acting like a real friend you just acted like a **** and you know what? When you learn from a friend that I wanted to suicide you asked why I never told you and said you’re there for me but when it was really time to be there I realize it was just bullshit… Well congrats now I want more than ever to die. I’m sorry if I displeased you with my emotions I didn’t want to shadow your perfect existence .
(English is not my first language sorry for the mistakes)
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“Change your attitude” is usually used when a person demanding respect or more commonly used when someone thinks you have the potential to be better (so don’t take that as a bad thing if you can’t see it in yourself).
Everyone will experience hardships in their lives.. and they will be to varying degrees. Someone who hasn’t been through a lot, may take consider something you feel is a really small contribution towards your pain as a lot because of their lack of experience. So someone who is going through something minor may be feeling the exact same level of depression/sadness as you are depending on their coping mechanism and their past experience.
Sure, you are right in saying that there are quite a number of people who don’t seem to fall very far when they are unhappy. But you have to understand that it’s quite hard to comfort people on a level that you don’t understand. They’re going to be worried about encouraging more negativity from you if don’t say positive things. In addition to that, honestly they probably just want you to snap out of it and enjoy some of the good things that you’re missing out on/overlooking because you’re so fixated on the bad. They just want to see you make the most of things.
Honestly, if you do want to hang around your friends and be invited to places you’re going to have to at least try to be more pleasant to be around or enjoy yourself when you’re with them. That’s what friends are for right? Enjoying each others company no matter the occasion and no matter what’s going on on the inside. Some people are actually very negative and you can really feel it in the air.. it’s difficult because it can make others feel really bad too and ultimately it can make them depressed as well if its bad enough – do you really want that?
With regards to your friend saying “Change your attitude”. I would take that as an ultimatum (you may want to look that up). She’s trying to tell you that she’s sick of your negativity and at the same time you desperately need to change your outlook on things before its too late and you’re stuck this way forever – which I doubt you want. She is also saying that she cannot help you with it – that’s something you need to fix and manage on your own. It is beyond her control/help.
From what I see, you do perhaps lack the encouragement from friends and family. However at the same time its not their fault that they can’t relate – and you can’t make them either, it’s something you have to experience first hand. You also have a lot of positive energy from your friends who tell you to ‘look on the bright side’, etc. which I highly recommend that you listen to before its too late. This is because soon all of this negativity you choose to think about all of the time is all you’re going to know.. and you won’t know how to be happy when time comes (if you even still have the capacity to be happy that late in the game).
So just try and enjoy yourself every now and then and let your troubles slip away when your friends need you to be there to have a good time. You need to build up that bond – a genuine bond – with your friends again if you want to really talk and that’s going to take time.. and when and if you do, you need to be careful that your talks don’t get so heavy that they aren’t comfortable with it.