Why bother

I’ve felt like this since I was 10. Its hard to tell if you’re “aware” or just naturally a depressed person. Its just implied that you go to school, get a job, do the 9-5 grind, go out for drinks, sit in for movies, get a wife, get a house, have a kid, repeat, repeat, repeat.

Now you’re 65 and 70% of your daily life from 18-65yrs has been spent in the grind working for some higher up douche in your company you’ve never met, and now its time to “retire”.

Now you’re 65 and too tired to really “live”, so you sit on your ass and watch tv all day, taking a daily assortment of pills, and generally doing nothing. Maybe you have a garden, or are the more distinguished; as you move to vancouver in a beach house and read philosophical books and drink wine.

This thought drove me insane. The only option in this scenario is to try and achieve a life of excellence. Have the opportunities of a retired person at 25, and live a stimulating, fast paced, spontaneous, and adventurous lifestyle.

Get jacked; dress like your a somebody,
Work for yourself; make passive income in your sleep,
Study Social Psychology; learn how to talk to people,
Become Spiritual; let go of ego, and fear, become truly confident and humble,

Oh yea, then achieve this and break part of your neck and upper back and end up on SP unable to think, altered brain chemistry causing fear, anger, depression, anxiety, paranoia, adrenal fatigue, generally sick and watch your eyes bulge and burn red all day.

Feeling more bitter today