It gets better…I promise

I can relate with so many of you. I grew up in a family where my father was an alcoholic and incredibly abusive.  My ever step or sniffle was a possible cause for a beating if he had too much to drink.  As I got older I internalized all the abuse.  I attempted suicide will pills but it never worked.  I used to pray every night that God would take me away. God obviously had other plans.  I had a horrific case of anorexia as I tried to control my life. Not eating didn’t help…I was tiny and people treat tiny people like china, but it doesn’t make the pain go away.  Finally I wound up in college where I finally started living.  It took years before I believed enough in myself to actually excel-but when I did I had a 4.0 without batting an eyelash. What everyone didn’t know was that I was a survivor.   I finished nursing school and then NP school. I have a beautiful family and a husband who loves me.  i now hold my children in my arms and am so thankful that i didn’t die when I wanted to end my life.  I am so thankful for-God!!!  God was the voice that lifted me thru the abuse.  He lifted me thru the anorexia. He told me I was worth the fight. I saw HIS face in my children when they were born.  I’m now seeing patients in HIS name because they are also his children in need (just as I am). Please do not end your life because you think that you have hit a wall or because your family has abandoned you. You are PRICELESS. No amount of money can compensate for who you ARE!!!  LIVE!!  Live in the face of adversity-enemies be damned!!  Live and find your spot on this earth-YOU HAVE A PURPOSE!