My pain.
Staying up all night wondering why your even alive.. Asking your self is it even worth being here ? Looking up to the moon and the stars while your tears are falling down your face. Looking down at your wrist and seeing all your scars. You close your eyes and reminiscing when you where that happy lil girl full of joy and faith. You open your eyes and your back to reality , where you hate everything about your self. You get out of your room and take a glance at your family apologizing to them in your mind for all the pain you’ve put them trough and your scared your going to put them trough even more pain. Now that question pops up again .. Are you even worth being here? Daily that question pops up at school you always have to fake a smile and fake being happy. Everyone around you thinks your just that girl who is always laughing and smiling and taking but do any of them know that’s just an act? That your just faking all of that so they don’t see the pain your feeling inside. No none catches the signals that your slowly dying inside. And hating the feeling of telling someone how your feeling inside because they might think your stupid or pathetic. So you just keep it all inside.. You can’t even tell your family because your Afraid that you already have put them trough enough so you don’t even tell them. Your back home locked in your room like always crying on your pillow letting it all out hoping they hear your screams but somehow they never do.. Your screaming for your life in your mind but in the out side you say ” I’m fine ” just to make everyone around you happy. At the end of the day your just that girl who has been suffering for a long while and no one has ever heard your screams for help because you blind them with that fake smile of yours and the biggest lie you’ve ever said ” I’m fine ” that they always believe.
1 comment
Yup I know what your talking about I think about suicide every week