Attempt one will be tonight, three hours from once this has posted, and I’ll be drinking bleach. Fingers crossed.
I can’t take it. He keeps hitting me and touching me and I can’t make him stop, you’re not allowed to tell your own fucking father what to do. It hurts. My hair is falling out slowly and he’s noticed when he pulls my hair and that kind of makes it worse.
As I’m typing this I’ve got three bottles of tequila and will be downing them as I go, I’m sorry if this becomes hard to read.
Everyone tells me bleach burns, but honestly, I like the burning. I drink alcohol nightly and the burning doesn’t effect me so hopefully this will be the same.
Before I chug the clorox, I wanna share this part of my story.
Three days ago I ran away from home. I obviously didn’t get very far because my dad found me immediately and pulled me into his fuckong red truck. I didn’t say a word the whole time hom. He threw me in the basement and losked it up and I stayed there for r night. He came down the enext morning, I think, and he made me toch him.
I think hell be home soon
Shouold I do it tinight?
If I make it out alive in will oost tomorrow.
12 comments
I wish I could help you….I hate fuckers that do shit to their kids. I’d kill all those that harm kids without a drop of remorse. Dont let him end you…fight…have you tried to get him locked up?
Thank you for your support on this. I’ve never called the cops but I’m honestly really afraid to. There’s no physical proof on me that he abuses me so if I were to call the police they probably wouldn’t do anything and he would just get even more angry
I can only say that I hope you reconsider. You’ve chosen a terrible way out that isn’t very effective and can leave you with horrible damage to your body.
I know you’ve considered calling the authorities and turning him in and that you probably have a fear of reprisal or other things that prevent you from doing that but if you can just once muster the courage to take action you can turn things around. I can’t and I won’t promise you the perfect outcome if you do that but if you were in a position to see the bigger picture you might believe that whatever the outcome it is better than the current path you are on.
I sincerely hope you reconsider, and if you do I wish the best for you.
You will be in my thoughts this evening and I know in the thoughts of many others even if they do not post a reply. You deserve much better than this.
-peace
Your comment really helped me through so thank you for that. I didn’t end up drinking it, just the tequila, he got home before I could do it. I’m very scared to call the cops on him because I don’t have any bruises or proof currently that show that he beats me, and if they don’t have any proof they probably wouldn’t do anything, which would just result in him becoming more violent than before, I think. Thank you for the help though.
Please definitely reconsider. None of this is your fault. Your dad needs serious help. And so do you. First thing you need to do is find a family member you can go to, and call the cops in a safe place. And then get the help you need. He’s not worth ending your life. I know things are so bad right now, but none of this is your fault. I truly hope you reconsider. Please talk to us. Before that, find someone you can stay with and call and have him locked up. He has to know he can’t get away with what he’s done. Stay strong, and we’re here if you need to talk.
Definitely do not drink bleach. You will end up in the hospital and destroy your vital organs but you won’t die right away. You will suffer agonizing pain for weeks and months as they try to keep you alive. We don’t live in a culture yet that euthanizes people so think of something else if you’re going to still do it.
I concur with the others, tell the police, your dad will go to jail. Here in Canada, they take child sex abuse very seriously-even an accusation can destroy a person’s life. You sound like a great person and I don’t think you should let your father win by ending your own life. Make him end his or get the cops after him and live with some other family member. Do not drink bleach, it is one of the worst ways to go and you will regret it after.
Do not do it. Get help.
This is not your fault. I was sexually tortured/assaulted from the time I was a baby to six-years-old. After that I moved to a violent home with my father. I am now in college. It’s rough; I cry and shake often. I have been in therapy for several years.
I don’t known why shit like this happens but I do know you don’t deserve a bit of it. There are sick people out there (most of my family). But there are good people, too. Find the good ones and get help.
I did want to mention, I got away from my abusers and my father. I have a long road of healing ahead of me but it is possible. I promise.
I met this guy who knew someone who tried drinking bleach. The shit basically ate away his throat and he survived. He regrets it.
Hope u don’t put yourself through that.
Do some research.
fuck that guy if you call the cops they will believe you and even if they dont they will still get him away from you
Don’t drink bleach..
If you don’t have proof on your body, get it on tape. You might not feel comfortable showing it to the police but I’m sure it’d be better than what you’re going through right now.
I hope you’ll get through this, take care.
I don’t have any great answers but just wanted to say that I am very sorry for your suffering. I don’t know what I would do if I were in your position. I guess I wouldn’t kill myself to get away from an asshole father. I don’t think bleach is a good idea. I totally understand about liking the burning. I self-harm and the burning feels good. I’ve heard that bleach isn’t that successful causing death. You just end up with severe internal injuries. If you do choose to die, I wish you a peaceful journey.