My health is gone i can’t recover

My health is gone i can’t recover, it’s been 5 painful yrs and i am still here…. I am tired of being hospitalize and being told i have nothing wrong with me and i am treated like i am crazy…. I tried eating natural stuff to cure my self and that in itself wasn’t helpful at all… I feel like i am in prison in my own body……. My family tells me not to give up and friends as well.. I have lost friends… this debilitating illness is drowning me… I feel like there’s no escaping this illness and i feel helpless…. I used to be in good health and i was a hard worker…. Always energetic and even though my life was traumatic before this illness i always pushed forward but now i don’t know these 5 yrs are suffocating me….. I can’t cry because my eyes dry up and i am in deep pain to the point where i have to put coconut oil on them so they wont hurt.. I am  just getting tired of this traumatic loop… I have meds to numb my depression but they don’t take the pain away completely… I am still sick….. I know i can’t regain my health back because i have spend thousands of dollars on almost everything.. i feel like i am in a dead end…..