New Comer

How many of you would actually care if I died, and if you did, for how long? I mean if I died the sun would still rise and set, the seasons would still change, my death would change nothing in the world. I’m nothing special, so why do you care what happens to me? My existence is meaningless, so therefore I believe that I do not need to stay. I mean, do you even know what it’s like to feel so damn sad and empty all the time and just wake up everyday to just fake a smile and pretend to be oh so very happy when you are oh so very not happy. I don’t understand why people want me to stay, it’s like being tortured everyday by your own thoughts. The only reason they want me to stay is because they don’t want to have to be in pain when I’m gone, well how the fuck do you think I feel everday. I’m miserable and you want me to keep going even though I’m the one who’s suffering. You don’t even think about how I feel, all you want is for you to not be in pain. I’m waiting to see if life Is actually worth the pain, which I’m pretty damn sure it isn’t, I’m going to kill myself sooner or later so why should I just wait when I can end all of this pain and suffering. I mean everyone gets over a death eventually right?