I Should Have

I do believe in God. I was in a car accident when I was three. I was in the back seat, my Dad was driving. As we were turning right at a stop sign we were t-boned by a huge SUV. My Dad was knocked out, had a dislocated shoulder and a concussion. I didn’t get a scratch. It wasn’t a terrible accident. The car was totaled. But not a scratch? Not even a shard of glass cutting my arm? After the accident, everybody told me that I told them about a lady in white with wings. They said I said she kept me company, sang to me until the ambulance got there. I have no memory of the lady, but it’s kind of cool to think about, right? But lately I’ve been thinking that the story about the lady in white was just a ruse to get me to believe in God. It was somewhat of a christian household after all.

God interfered. I should have died in that car accident thirteen years ago but God interfered and now I have nothing inside me but hate and anger and sadness. Funny, I never acknowledged the sadness until just now, writing this. Anyway, today is my sixteenth birthday, I told God if he didn’t let me die before this I would do it my self. So, yeah. Happy birthday to me.