I want to kill the fucking voices in my head, I feel suffocated
They love to torture me until I sleep.
I want to be alright, I really do but they yell at me horrible things.
“WHORE” “UGLY” “WORTHLESS” “YOU SHOULD DIE NO ONE IS GOING TO CARE” “INVISIBLE” “POINT LESS” “WASTE” “FRUSTATED” “TALENT LESS” “KEEP CUTTING, KEEP STARVING KEEP SELF HARMING YOU REALLY DESERVE IT” “YOU ARE A SUICIDE PSYCHO ***** THAT’S NOT GOING TO CHANGE”
I just want them to stop, I’m not that kind of mean person. JUST STOP.
5 comments
Sorry to hear that you have voices in your head that persecute you all the time. I’m assuming you have schizophrenia, I don’t know if they have any medication for that.
I only have one voice in my head-my own, and sometimes I’m hard on myself but fortunately it’s a voice I can turn on or off at will. I think the for you to remember is that all the voices are in your head, you control them, you can make them go away and silence them. Perhaps you can also alter their messaging so they become supportive of you.
The “other voices” I’ve heard is when people have said certain things to me, but for the most part very little ever sticks-I guess I’m pretty independent that way. Maybe there are mental exercises or techniques you can use to shut off those voices-good luck.
I don’t have schizophrenia I’m talking about voices as a metaphor.
Ok that makes it easier then because you can decide to turn off to change that self-talk whenever you like.
I’m sure when your voices tell you such things they may seem ‘true’ and probably something that may be repetitious. I’ve had that kind of denigrating self-talk as well. Perhaps they contain a grain of truth, but only at the expense of other valid ideas/statements.
Perhaps expand that self-conversation to include, that you’re also a very good person who helps others, etc. Hope that helps.
*hugs*
These things you/they say are not true and you know it.
You’re not ugly, you’re not worthless, you are not talentless.
You’re not a psycho, and you don’t deserve anything bad like hurting yourself.
You haven’t done anything wrong and you have no reason to be this extremely harsh on yourself.