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i am weak

by souptool

All I want is to die, why is it so hard to kill myself?

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souptool 6/8/2016 - 12:17 am

I wish there was some rare I could just go, fall into a hole and die.

Iwantpeace2 6/8/2016 - 12:22 am

Would yu mind tellin me why ill tell yu why im here

souptool 6/8/2016 - 1:42 am

I’m in pain.
unexplainable pain.
honestly I have everything. Good parents, good looking, smart I EXCEL at everything I put my mind to.
BUT… I have shifty friends, no girlfriend for the last 4 or 5 years… and a drug and alcohol “problem”… even then 5 months of sobriety I’m just as miserable.
I think what it boils down to is I just want to be loved

restrictingheart 6/8/2016 - 12:38 am

You know I have asked myself that question so many times. I wish I could give you an answer that would make some sense or would help you but I haven’t found my own answer yet. I hope you find yours. Maybe it will be a reason to live. Someone once told me that the reason I couldn’t go was because I had a reason to stay. I just had to find it. Maybe you will find yours reason.

SeeSmith 6/8/2016 - 1:02 am

You are not weak. There are parts of you that ain’t ready to die. You need to have a conversation with those parts of yourself.

souptool 6/8/2016 - 1:45 am

Just tried hanging… aparently not rdy to die that way either
I don’t know why I cling to life like I do… what keeps you going?

shatterediris 6/8/2016 - 4:02 am

I know the question isn’t aimed at me, but most people do tend to have an urge to not die…. Mine is actually quite strong which is annoying, as I actually want to die but I will instinctively avoid harm and such things…. It’s just something I can’t really turn off at all…. I assume a lot of people have that. I assume I’ll get over it with enough time, just like I got over the things that prevented me from hurting myself with enough time and exposure. But really it’s probably best not to try to work around them…. I would much rather that people don’t

IControlmydestiny 6/8/2016 - 8:36 pm

Make better friends. Doing volunteer work will put you in places where you can meet awesome people and make good friends and maybe get a relationship unexpectedly. Changing your environment might change the outcome for you. Dying is painful whether by your hand or another’s. Our basic instinct is to survive, so do that for now. GL

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