I don’t no how to start but i am going to start by saying all of this pain i have is making it into suicide
- ~~I’m always home watching my brothers and never have any freedom to do what i want i never see my mom at home spend no day with us no more that hurt because we always used to hange out and have time to share anything with her when we need help or happy or sad or mad but not no more i keep it all to my self deep inside AND never tell no one it hurt to have to fake that ima perfect which i am not i cut myself when i am mad or hurt i smoke weed when i wanna feel good and get dronk when im happy and dont have no one to share it with i dont have my dad in my life because he chosen to cheat on my mom and sell drugs and get high he left at the age of 4years old that hurt to no i feel that i dont have any of my parents in my life butt i do butt they dont show it because they dont show the love to me but they do to there boyfriends or girlfriends they putt they partner before they own kidds it hurt to no that it show we are not important to them soo i want to die when i am in school i sit by myself do my work alone dont talk to anyone like that never eat lunch and never laugh always sad,mad anything that mean sad or mad and when i come home i get on the computer and look up dead [picz] of peoples killing them self or go up stairs to my room and draw [picz] of me killing myself or listen to music load and start crying screaming laughing cutting myself i lost my besttie zaida for good that hurts because she was my heart when i cutt myself my blood is the color of the love for her i treated her wrong a couple times and now that she gone i am sad i lost my cuzzo junior all because he bisexual his mom send him away far far away he was the closest person to me i talk to him about ever singel things hanged out with him and he was there for me when my mom or dad was not now that all this is changing all i can say is i want to take a razor putt it on my hand and cutt myself blaming my self for everything that happen in my life thinking if i die my mom will come back home and spend time with my brothers and my family will changed how they think about gay people and my friendz wont kare if i die now all this will make them move on with out me and happy because i want to die all i can say is goodby. by carlos g martinez jr
- If anybody wants to ask me anything about my life or anything don’t ask me on this site give me a call my cell is 215-954-3411 call anytime any day i am always up i never sleep crying for help sad,thanks for taking your time reading my story.