i can’t be happy if I’m not dating someone

i feel awful when I’m alone i feel like no one loves me or wants to be around me. which is probably true, i mean people just don’t like me. idk why I’m always nice maybe ill tell some bad jokes that aren’t funny sometimes but the good jokes come a lot more often than the bad. Maybe I’m not the coolest guy ever but people love me when we’re drunk i guess because its easy when neither of you can follow in conversation and just say whatever pops into our heads. but i guess my deep seeded hatred of myself comes from my inability to be happy without a woman in my life. That feeling when you have someone to be there for you and love you is the best feeling in the world and when its gone it feels like I’m going through opiate withdrawal my head feels like its going to explode. All i can think about is getting another hit however i can so that i can kill the pain, my only problem is that all of my dealers got arrested( this is part of the simile i’m not a drug addict ) and not I’m alone my head hurts and i have no one to fall back on… this is rock bottom for me