im thinking about ending it all tonight, i just really cant bare to be apart of this horrible world anymore, ive been getting nothing but depressed evry single day and each day it gets worse, nothing good is happening to me only bad things, im being bullied by my own family, and i just cant take it anymore. and on top of that i ran into my friend or should i say ex friend/ someone i liked and she was at the counter and i was standing in line at tim hortons and she didnt even wave at me she was freaking facing me too […]
i dont know how to explainn it but i feel empty inside… its like ive given up on everything, my hopes, my will, and dreams…. ive completely frozen over, i dont show any emotion anymore and if i do, its all forced, it’s fake, i cant take it anymore…. i thought maybe its because i didnt feel anything about my friend who died recently or maybe ive just gotten use to death being apart of my life… idk anymore but this thing, this depression has changed me, each and every time i wake up i seem to be getting deeper into the darkness and soon […]
im scared of letting people know about my suicide thoughts, im scared on how they will react and what they would say. there are only 3 people in the world that ive told and 2/3 have forgotten about it and the other one died… im scared in what i’d do to myself in an hour and even in a day.. i cant trust myself or anyone else with this secret… no matter how hard i try to get better, it seems like i have nothing to live for…. and then i just quit, after a few hours of thinking i truly have nothing to live […]
i dont know what to do… i like my ex agai… ive been waiting for her for 5-6 years now and shes in a relationship, but thats kinda going dwn the drain and ive been talking to ppl and they say she’s just using me and or toying with me. one minute she would flirt with me and the other she will keep her distance… were already doing “couple like things” where whang out everyday and text everyday, and even talk on the phone till we fall asleep every other day. ppl say that im her fall to guy but i dont want to be […]
i started to cut again, the urge in me gets stronger and im just falling apart. i feel like my world that i slowly built is falling down on me. its hard to breath, and i just cant take it anymore. if anyone else found out that i started again i dont even know what they would do to me, they probably beat the shit out of me again. but i just cant take it anymore, im one cut away from taking my own life. im just stressed out about everything, college, work, art, friends, family, my future… theres just no escape… even right now […]
who am i kidding im a nobody. im no artist im not even worth calling trash. i try and try but im still not getting any better with my art.. i cant even design my own original characters without it looking like crap. so y should i even bother. im a failure as a human and an artist…
people tell me im ugly that i will never find someone to love because of who i am, for what i am… im actually sarting to beleive them… who would love someone like me? suicidal, always depressed, monster? in this world i am at the bottom i am ugly im a monster. i try working out i tried diets and other stuff that will help me get into shape but no matter what i do im un loved… im already struggling as an artist and trying to get my art work out there but no one seems to actually care for it my friends just […]
i feel unloved and not wanted… my friends seem to only use me for there own needs but when it comes to my feelings it does not matter. im a nobody… why wont anyone listen to me? why wont anyone lend me a shoulder to cry on? everyone constantly makes fun of me and my looks… i know i dont look good but i still… if they only knew how fucked up i was then maybe just maybe they will care for me as much as my beloved did. at the same time i have a feeling that most of my so called friends would […]
yup remorseless thats me i feel no remorse no pain…. i gave myself that name because i dont care for my life i never did…. im just a monster who does not belong… when someone dies it doesnt hurt me… i stop trying to find someone who would get me, someone who would accept me but turns out theres no one… day by day as i looked for acceptance in this world i only end up hardening my shell because i know theres no one out there… so i stoped caring, i stoped taking care of myself and i someone gave up on my art…. […]
i just found out litterally 2 min ago that my friend holly died last night in the whitby fire….. she was a good friend even though we never met in person but we still texted each other… we were close and she would help me with things…. right now i feel nothing, y is that? this would make 8 deaths now and i feel nothing :'( am i truely a heartless monster…. do i really live up to my art name…. am i really someone who shows no remorse someone who feels no pain? what the FUCK AM I!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i dont feel like i belong anywhere in this society. im struggling with my art and life… i practically dont even have a love life… when im with my friends i feel left out like a lost my connections with them like im in a different world… i already know im not apart of my family… im what you would call the black sheep in the heard… my dad despises me because im nothing like him…. just today we got into a fight because i said i was not commuting all the way to wounderland andi told him.. well more like reminded him im alergic […]
i fell in love with this one girl her name was samantha right from the bat i knew she was suicidal but that did not stop me… i thouhgt she could help me escape… she and i were very similar in many ways… people would tell me we were soulmates… we were sappose to die together that was the plan…but i wanted to finish something before i died she had agreed that she would wait for me and she did… little i knew the more she waited the more her pain… our pain grew… i told her to use my body in hwat ever she […]
i feel used by my friends its like they would only call me when they need me… but not once have they ever took the time out of there worlds to ever say whats wrong or to even notice that im in pain inside…. they just think im being just my regular self, but if only they knew what twisted chaos that goes inside my head… i know for a fact they could leave me… everyone leaves me… so y should i bother to stay in the unloved world when im being used by the people who i should trust… if only i had my […]
hi im new here and i dont know how i should start off…. but i guess i can tell you some background story…. ive been suicidal for a really long time now. when i was around 6 or 7 i tried to kill myself… i slit my wrist but sadly it was not deep enough to finish me off… ive been struggling with this depression on and off and i dont know what to do anymore… i can feel the thing inside me getting stronger… the urge to kill myself… ive caught myself a few times and stoped what i was doing or going to […]