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General

For general topics related to the site.

Is anyone else out there like me??

by Slowly_Fading 8/16/2014

written by Slowly_Fading

I was abused as a child. I can’t remember so many things! I have so many empty spots in my memory that I can’t deal with! I began self harming in elementary school. I haven’t been clean for longer than two weeks since. I want to die so badly! I can’t deal with the pressure from my family, the disappointment in their eyes when they look at me, knowing how much more disappointed they’d be if they found out I’m not as straight as they think. I am everything they hate. I can’t do anything right in their eyes, yet they expect so much from […]

8/16/2014 5 comments

I’m so close to just beating my head on the wall.

by katiebear12 8/15/2014

written by katiebear12

I give up on everything. I don’t see the point anymore.

8/15/2014 7 comments

I Am Broken

by broken2017 8/15/2014

written by broken2017

I am lonely.
Mostly on days like today. I feel so completely alone though I am surrounded by so many people. So many people who might care, if I told them that is. But the thing is, even though I am surrounded by caring people, none of them notice.
Some days I get asked a simple question, “Are you okay?” and I know that I should quit lying. I should stop pasting on a smile and giving them some bullshit answer such as “I’m fine,” or on days I can barely muster that smile, “I’m just tired,”. As if lying to everyone around me will […]

8/15/2014 8 comments

“Become one….”

by PeelASquid 8/15/2014

written by PeelASquid

Just done tryin,

Tired of cryin.

Got nothing to give,

Got no reason to live.

No one will care,

No one will be there.

Just me all alone,

Just want to go home.

Walk into the sea,

Let it swallow me.

Become one with the deep.

Eternal sleep.

8/15/2014 0 comment

Questions and Answers To Life

by apple21 8/15/2014

written by apple21

The big question whist happens after we die, where do we go. Do we go into a spiritual realm for tortured souls, do we go into nothing, do we go into a dream world for good, do we see others that are past,do we go to heaven, do we go to hell? These are the questions that every one wonders, even the most religious person must think in the back of their minds I hope there is a heaven. So to kill yourself is a sin and then we end up in hell. Whet if you think life is hell, why is there such a […]

8/15/2014 10 comments

I suppose it’s time…

by nozmoking 8/15/2014

written by nozmoking

I’ve been away from the site for a couple of weeks and I have to weigh in on Robin Williams. Nobody seems to understand how personal pain can be so great to drive a person to destroy themselves in such a violent and agonizing way. Think for a moment (if you haven’t) how horrible it would be to hang from the neck using a leather belt – not “hang” as they do in a calculating way to snap the neck but to hang, suffocating in violent pain until you pass out – maybe more than once.

I write this not to be morbid in any way but […]

8/15/2014 3 comments

My story

by Paige 8/15/2014

written by Paige

Let’s just say, the last six years of my life haven’t been easy.. and now I’m at a point in life where I’m starting to struggle. When I was fourteen, I lost my mum to cancer, and that was when my world started to come crashing down. I went off the rails.. I spent all of my time drinking, taking drugs, trying to shut everything out and for a while it worked. That was until my brother got ill, since we’d lost mum, he was severely depressed and wouldn’t leave the house. He started to act strange and had a few episodes in which he […]

8/15/2014 4 comments

I FEEL LIKE DYING

by pinkclouds 8/15/2014

written by pinkclouds

ITS INCREDIBLE HOW PEOPLE LOOK AT ME EVERYDAY AND CANT SEE THAT IM IN SO MUCH PAIN. THERES SO MUCH I HAVE BEEN HOLDING IN. I CRIED LAST NIGHT… IT DIDNT HELP AT ALL. I STILL FEEL LIKE SHIT. ITS LIKE IM ON THIS BIG SEARCH FOR LOVE THAT WILL NEVER END. I DO GET A LOT OF ATTENTION ALL THE TIME. GUYS WANT TO DATE ME AND BE WITH ME BUT ITS ALWAYS WRONG. SO I DECIDED TO BLOCK EVERYONE FROM MY PHONE.. NO INSTAGRAM FOR A WHILE. I JUST WANT TO DISAPPEAR.. AFTER THIS I WILL SEE WHAT I DECIDE TO DO..

8/15/2014 14 comments

i feel like i have been through so much

by pinkclouds 8/15/2014

written by pinkclouds

i swear i have been through so much in my 21 years of age, any other person would’ve killed themselves.. im not there yet. but there isn’t a time that i don’t think about it. im at the point where its so hard for me to hold anything in. i just wanna cry and get away from everyone. everyone always ends up hurting me anyways. lol. im just looking for love.. Arent we all tho? isnt that the only thing that kills us. we all crave it and need it. and every time i find it, it turns to shit. its like every time its […]

8/15/2014 0 comment

Poem

by apple21 8/15/2014

written by apple21

The darkness is death – we can speak, but we are not heard. We can scream but they turn their backs. We can run, but we cannot catch them. It is the dream where arms and legs won’t work they way they should, and the air is too thick to breathe. Loved ones walk a mile ahead, forgetting to stop as we fall behind. This is the reality of the darkness. We are buried alive inside ourselves. ”
– Dana-Christene Umanetz

8/15/2014 1 comment

Seven cups of tea.

by monsterly 8/15/2014

written by monsterly

If you feel like talking, there are trained listeners who will listen to you 24/7 about anything that burdens you.

Give it a try.

8/15/2014 15 comments

The eve before the big event.

by All But Over Now 8/15/2014

written by All But Over Now

Today felt different. Not really a good or bad different. I went to work today as I had been out the last few days due to the fact I was not mentally able to go. Today was just a strange day. I did my normal routines, handled my normal business. I spoke very little. A couple co-workers told me I was a “bit off” today. They asked if everything was alright. I assured them everything was fine – from my perspective anyways.

The ride home from work was different too. The sun was well past its zenith, the shadows were long, a light breeze in the […]

8/15/2014 15 comments

Night of peace……

by PeelASquid 8/15/2014

written by PeelASquid

For those of you who want to be in peace…… video I made… 🙂

8/15/2014 3 comments

To be set free

by nias 8/15/2014

written by nias

I know that people in my life, at work etc. will wonder why I took my own life. Suicide seems to be viewed as a tragic loss, especially by those who don’t suffer from depression but I feel that once hope is truly lost, it should be considered as finally being set free from the cage of mental anguish, the ending of all the misery and suffering that someone has endured. To succeed is the ultimate goal but I personally fear failure and rather than the endless sleep I seek, will it be the torment of waking up to the knowledge that I’ll continue to […]

8/15/2014 1 comment

I just can’t

by crazycatlady 8/15/2014

written by crazycatlady

I had my daughter when I was 21, and her dad left when she was three. From then on, it was just her and me. Over the years, as she got older, she and I became best friends, and I sort of just let my other relationships die. It was easier. I’m awkward, and relationships aren’t easy for me. With her, it was. I feel like I kind of grew up with her…well, as much as I’ve grown up. We had a lot of fun. She was this bright light in my otherwise very dark life.

Last summer, I met this guy. He was younger than […]

8/15/2014 10 comments

all but over now

by fenceguy2 8/15/2014

written by fenceguy2

hey, all but over now, where you at?

fence

8/15/2014 2 comments

I feel that life is ultimately pointless.

by bornfordying123 8/15/2014

written by bornfordying123

I really do, i feel humans invent these fake ‘gods’ to make us feel like there is some point to it all. Its like that line in that Dylan song ‘All along the watchtower’ : ‘some of us here feel that life is but a joke’ its like ever since i heard that line many years ago i feel it resonate with me.
Its like who cares ‘who’ you are, how much money you make, how much you impress other people at the end of our existence what does it all matter anyway. Who cares if you indulge in certain unhealthy activities, life is short just […]

8/15/2014 2 comments

Self-medicating: Drugs, alcohol and sex — I’m all for it!

by Flintstone 8/15/2014

written by Flintstone

So we suffer, some of us not so silently.

We self-medicate, I need a couple cocktails in the evening. I have a friend who likes “reefer” (it does nothing for me.)

We (you all out there) also use sex as a drug (some of you anyway) to lose yourself in for awhile. Sometimes 10 or 15 minutes, in my case an hour and a half… 🙂 but it helps for awhile anyway. And the planning, arranging when to meet, where, etc. takes some time away from our collective misery.

Now I’m sure many if not most of you out there have heard the usual BS from your mental […]

8/15/2014 8 comments

Just A Cut

by Kelly_Kaulitz 8/15/2014

written by Kelly_Kaulitz

Just a cut,
Just a scratch,
“What’s that mark?”
“It’s just a cat.”
Just an excuse,
Just another lie,
“What’s with all the bracelets?”
“Just fashion, why?”
Just a tear,
Just a scream,
“Why were you crying?”
“Just a bad dream.”
But it’s not just a cut,
Or a tear, or a lie,
It’s always,
“Just one more”,
Until you die.

8/15/2014 8 comments

one.

by Kelly_Kaulitz 8/15/2014

written by Kelly_Kaulitz

It’s so hard to talk when you want to kill yourself. That’s above and beyond everything else, and it’s not a mental complaint-it’s a physical thing. Like it’s physically hard to open your mouth and make the words come out. So you just keep quiet.

8/15/2014 2 comments

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