For general topics related to the site.
is built in way that if you undergoing lot of pain in life it automatically triggers suicidal thoughts
Hey i just checked out this site.. bc i been looking for ways to kill myself and.get over the fear of pain. I have accomplished. that and bc the girl im in love with chooses to ignore me she will see ill be dead within 2 weeks. Why wait you guys say. Well i did actually attemp to od and ju,p off a bridge into traffic but i puked before i took the pills and got scared. But i ha e done my research. I will die by a mix of pills and alcohol. I will drink till my bac is so high and take […]
He left with her; ten years younger than I. How the hell can I compete? He is so beautiful to look at I want to stab a knife in my stomach and rip all the guts out by turning. I can’t have what I want. I want him. He wants her: story of my life. I saw them leave together. So I ended up drunk at some house party where I made a fool of myself and let some dumb dog chew my hands and arms to bits. I feel nothing. It felt so good at the time to let the dog chew and chew […]
http://suicideproject.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/08-Lost-Paradise.mp3
Hi guys, I’m Declan and obviously I’m new here and I thought I’d introduce myself:
I was born into a stable family. I have loving parents that care for me. Wanna know the weird thing? I’m unhappy. Mhmm, unhappy with life but I have parents who love me. That’s because I haven’t talked about my school life:
So skipping the cringeworthy moments I had in prep to grade 6. Grade 7 was when I began experiencing bullying. It was nothing physical, I used to get teased a lot because of my name. Now, one of my flaws as a human being is that  I won’t tell anyone […]
So Shakinbakin and I have decided to work on an EP together – we have a couple of pieces being produced at the moment – this is one of them. Obviously this is before the music magic happens, but thought that there might be some poetry fans that could appreciate it raw.
As always, for the benefit of those that have troubles with an Australian accent, the poem is below.
The Point
I’ve developed an overwhelming hatred of sobriety
When I’m fucked up is the only time I don’t hate myself entirely
Isaac Newton said that what goes up, must come down
So the higher you get, the […]
my parents have done so much for me
yet im failing all my subjects and im fat and i just feel so much burden. Everytime i think about one bad result, everything come crashing down and i think about my future and then dying and then i just wish somebody would kill me.
someone please kill me, ill pay you.
Finally I can have this back. Finally got *him* to leave this alone. God where the hell do I start? I was in the bathroom one day and I just filled up the tub. No bubbles. No nothing. It’s not like I was trying to have a bubble bath. And I got in and went underwater. As long as I could. Knowing that I’ll struggle and finally come up for air once I can’t take anymore. But I wanted to suffer. Feel me black out. I sat there for 2 hours of just complete silence. I’ve had a relapse and it’s horrible.
Just want to first say this:
IF YOU ARE ON HERE READING THIS PLEASE FORCE YOURSELF TO FIND REASONS NOT TO AND THEN COME UP WITH A RADICAL BUT ACHIEVABLE PLAN FOR BEGINNING TO LIVE AND EMBRACE LIFE AGAIN.
YOU ARE WORTH IT. YOU ARE, EVEN IF YOU CAN’T RECOGNIZE IT RIGHT NOW.
PAIN, DARKNESS CAN BE OVERCOME.
* * *
Have attempted suicide a few times, most recently 2007 (carbon monoxide, more impulsive and less deliberate) and 2012 (overdose, deliberate and methodical).
2012 was closest to date; received dialysis twice and woke up convinced I had irreversible brain damage. Realize that my resolve to succeed each time is growing and […]
If I could do it and not hurt her, I think I would be gone. I wish I could do it and her not think it’s her fault. I wish she knew that I did it because I am the worthless one who is trying to save her from anymore pain. She is my sunshine. With out her my world is very dark.
For starters, I’m amber. Despite what it was like growing up, I was generally a happy kid. I had my grandpa to thank for that. My family and I lived with him until I was about 10. I was very close to him. My parents didn’t pay much attention to me because of my older sister and twin younger brother and sister they had to worry about. My grandpa was always there for me, he defended me and stopped my dad from beating me. Three years ago he passed away and for three years, I haven’t been the same.
All I want is to be […]
I just want to sleep, dreamless, for eternity.
My life is destroyed beyond repair due to actions and decisions I made while having bipolar episodes. My financial state is ruined because of mania and my academic/professional state is in tatters because of depression. I have wasted time, ignored my talents, and destroyed my opportunities.
I have been on countless medications, slogged through endless CBT appointments. Nothing is working. I have no hope left. I am a ruined, broken creature. I do not have it in myself to continue any longer.
I regret leaving behind those that care for me – especially my boyfriend and father. However, I cannot […]
I know this sounds silly but, would it be ideal to wear a diaper underneath a person’s clothes when it’s time to leave? Â I keep hearing different things about how people lose control of their bladder when the die.
As it gets closer to time I’m wondering what it will be like. Will there be pain? Will I feel life leaving my body? Will I be asleep? Will I be afraid? Will I fail? If I fail what’s going to happen? Will I be hospitalized? Psych hold? What method will I try next if the pills fail me? My brain is busy processing all these questions. Has anyone attempted before that is willing to share your experience?
I hate self harm relapses. Not like being “clean” from cutting for 4 days is a big hoorah.
Just damn. I wish the blade was sharper to get more blood.
ahh…don’t listen to me ramble…im overtired and plain batshit insane hehehehe
i’m cutting my fucking self again, i don’t get posting this, but fuck off, i feel so fucking lost right now.
Anyone want to chat? Yknow, about death and stuff? Anyone at all? I really am losing my grip on reality.
Just another day of fighting with my fiancee. God, I CAN’T wait to find employment and move out of here. I have to. It’s so miserable knowing that I’m a 25 year old who will never be married as long as I’m with him. He’s verbally and physically abusive, and never sorry about it. He controls everything and takes so much from me. When his plans fall through, it’s my fault, or anyone else’s but his. He literally believes that he is God, and should actually be locked up in a psych ward. The amount of times that I should have called the cops on […]
Well, I’ve been off my med (200mg Zoloft) for three weeks. Cold turkey. I was on it for both depression and anxiety.
The only difference I notice is that the physical symptoms of my anxiety have returned. That trembling sensation in my hands, nausea, sweating, flushing, etc. Anxiety levels and depression levels are the same.
Withdrawal effects were pretty tame. Nausea, head aches, dizziness, emotional lability (i.e. uncontrollable crying/laughter at odd times)
Hmm probably should go back. The physical symptoms of anxiety are a ***** and they are mostly visible to other people which is not good and in turn makes me more anxious.
I’ve realized I’m no good my family hates me my grandpa doesn’t like me my uncle always fucks with me and makes me feel worse as for why this impacts me so deeply is I have no father all mine is happens to be a pill popper and can barley sustain himself for two minutes without going into a fit of rage. My grandpa has always thought lower of me and never did like me at times it really shows for example, he always goes on about how I’m soo dumb or how I never change when I try when he sits on his fucking […]
lot of other monkeys got attracted to it, and they also started to jump into the race
new monkeys are born to racing monkeys and they also started following parents
after some time, first group of monkeys died, remaining monkeys keep running in the race
after a long time a new monkey started asking why should a monkey’s  life wasted in the race like this?
no one has the answer.
Same way as humans don’t have answer for why they live