General

Okay so idk if somethings really wrong with the way i.look or ifi just naturaly look depressed but i was having a good time laughing and joking and one of my friends out of the blue said why do you look so.depressed were supose to be having fun and i said i am having fun dont you.see me laughing the.he.said yeah but right after you get done laughing youu get this look on your face like your about.to cry or.something i sat there for a moment then left out the room crying.they all asked why i was crying and i wouldnt tell them […]

I turned 30 in October.  I have a fairly large family (six kids) and two good parents who are, thankfully, still with us.  I have had difficulty sleeping my entire life.  I don’t know exactly when it turned into full blown insomnia but, these days, I’m lucky to get even two hours of sleep a night, if I sleep at all.  I can feel myself losing my grip on reality.  I’ve been so depressed and so alone for so long, if I even had a chance to change, I wouldn’t know how.  I don’t want to die, but I’ve held on for as long as […]

Sometimesi can really feel lile im not wort the air i breath or the space i take up on this earth theres someone out there who want a life like mies way more then i do.i cant even stand to wake up every morning i always wish that like something bad happenexd over night and i didnt here of feel nothing but im dead.see when i die i dont want to suffer before i go i want a quick and painless death lile getting shot lin the heado or jumping off a 200 floor building

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=1YxAGx0Dq1E
A Fav comedian of mine …

Can’t sleep…
I vowed to myself not to eat past 7pm, and I’m eating way smaller portions than my stomach is used to. People say I’m not fat…at 135, I highly disagree. I’m disgusted with myself when I look in the mirror. I used to be 115…from highschool up until about 6 months ago, when I gained 20 pounds in what seemed like a matter of days.
But my hunger pains aren’t the only reason why I can’t sleep.

Last summer I was sexually harassed by my boss. It was so bad for me that I only worked 3 days at that job. I’ve told people […]

I really don’t know how much longer I can do this!!! I am on the edge of falling down and leaving this planet!! No one would f**** care!!! No one has ever cared, they will never notice me gone cuz they don’t notice me now!!! I can’t believe anyone now! I have lost trust in everyone!! I don’t know where to go now! I have tried everything but yet to actually commit suicide! And it’s very close at this point! My family thinks I have a secret life! My so friends r mad at me for no reason! I feel lonely everyday, depressed everyday! I […]

Nothing in my life ever works out for the better. God does not care about me. I pray for death to take me….please death take me!!!!! My life has no purpose …there ain’t one thing I like about myself…not one

I am new here… 23 yrs old, female, job I love, boyfriend I love, caring family that i love… So WHY can’t I be happy like I should be?

I am surrounded by loving people but I feel so alone.

i found this so i wanna share it
http://www.sixbillionsecrets.com/gethelp#comment-400825163

Why do I set barriers up on how I should go? I can get a gun, which has got to be the easiest way to do it, but I feel like people will “blame” the gun? Is that weird? I’m all for gun rights and wouldnt want my suicide to be the cause of more gun laws? Why do I care?

I also won’t do it in my house because I don’t want the house tainted or haunted for the next person who lives there. Again why do I care?

Leaning toward a rope in my office.

Well, getting down to the final stretch now, like Dawg indicated, a lot of the stress has been relieved by  knowing that there is an end in sight; however, although more peaceful, the number of negative and irritating things that have led me to this point do not seem to have abated much. Nothing earth shattering, but enough to make me realize that I was not putting an extra negative spin on minutia.  Halleluiah, I am vindicated. 🙂